Full time teacher with small children...need positive stories please!

[littlebid]

I’ve gone back to full time teaching after mat leave #2, eldest is 4, youngest about to turn 1. It’s a supportive department, non core subject, shared planning...workload has never been an issue. I’ve been back just over a term and going part time is not an option for lots of reasons. And generally, I love my job. I’m a really annoying super job-positive teacher.

But I’m looking for - and not finding - another voice, a role model, just someone else in the same boat. Literally every other teaching mum with kids under 11 seems to be part time. Is anyone else doing this? And can share positive stories about it being possible?

I’m full of end-of-breastfeeding hormones, sleep deprived from a non-sleeping baby and at the end of a very intense exam season. Please tell me it’s going to be ok!

(And please don’t tell me to go part time: I really just need encouragement, as ostrichy as that sounds)

Hi. I went back full time after both of mine when they were 7 months, as HOD. They’re now 2 and 7. It’s got it’s tough points, parents evenings and meeting nights are hard. What makes it easier for me is a DH who does the childminder and school pick-ups, food shop and cooking. So I get home and tea is made. He works nights in order for this to happen, which means I have to do all bath and bad alone through the week. Which after a full day at work gets tiring! I get them in bed by 7.30 so I then have me time or get work done. If I didn’t have them in bed by then, I think I would lose my mind! I also have to do mornings alone. Getting all three of us ready and out by 7.40 is stressful. But we’re in a routine. I’m organised. Everything laid out the night before, bags in car etc. The boys are good at doing it all without fuss thank goodness. But yes, it can be bloody hard being full time!

I should add that the hardest bit is dealing with challenging kids all day, being emotionally and physically drained, then coming home to my boys being noisy, wrestling, annoying each other, demanding, being difficult. I want to just walk back out sometimes! So I often walk the dog before DH leaves for work, just to destress and be a better mum. I do feel bad for being impatient with them at times

Sorry. You wanted positive stories!!! It works. You get the full time money. Consistency. I wouldn’t be part-time to be honest!

I'm full time with a 4 & 2 year old. Like PP I tried part time but for the 20% pay cut But in no way 20% less work as I was still teaching every year group from 7-13.
It is hard and my head isn't flexible at all, his favourite word is 'parity'.
But it makes so much more sense for my family than part time - we can really enjoy weekends and holidays and they can do lots of extra curricular activities. I do still get twinges of guilt and as all teachers work life balance is difficult to manage. Im aware that I'm very lucky too as the dc are always with family or friends whilst I work.

I do work late though as I do all my extra bits when the children are asleep. I find it hard to know how bad teaching and parenting is because I've never done any other profession so I do t know if the grass is greener or if we're lucky with the hours (in the school itself) and holidays?

Of course it's doable! Lots of us have no choice due to financial pressures, but also, my job wouldn't be a PT role.
I'm hod in a core subject, 2 primary age DC (been doing it from them being babies) and 5 years ago, my h left so doing it all on my own.
Lots of difficult moments. But on the whole, we run very smoothly. I try to be organised but things do get missed. You just need to let the little things go.

And just think of the reward in 5 weeks time 🛌

Oh and also pension - part time really does impact your final pot/ability to retire earlier!

I'll admit I didn't work for a time, mainly due to moving a lot. I went back to full time primary when the kids were 8,7 and 3 but I was abroad and had onsite child care and a 5 person team to share the planning which made it easier. I'm back in the UK, was PPA cover but have been unexpectedly placed in a class since Easter, it's report writing time for a class I don't really know and another member of the year team has gone off sick too. The kids are now 12, 10 and 8 but I'm also now caring for the husband who's been having radiotherapy and chemo since November. Still smiling. At the job at least. House is a compete tip though (oh, and we're just waiting to complete on a house move)

Thank you all so much, this is making me feel much less alone. It’s so true that going part time doesn’t mean that much less work; but is a big drop in income. And the holidays are such a treat (especially with the money to do something in them). Plus no issue with holiday childcare. I do know we’re in the right place for us, these early years are just so intense I guess. Maybe whatever I were doing, I would feel this way somehow.

I’m still an RQT (retrained after DC1) and I am ambitious, so part time really wouldn’t be the right choice in that respect either (and yes to pension too!)

You’re all making me feel much better...I hope someone else doing the same searches I did, comes across this thread x

I teach primary full time and I have a 5 year old and a 1 year old. I love it, wouldn't change it for the world. My job is a huge part of my identity and I wouldn't want to go back to part time (did it before). I went back to work full time when my youngest was 9 months old. I am tired, and I hardly ever have any me time, but I think the mental health benefits of working are worth it. I feel more relaxed at work (I teach year 6) than I did at home with a colicky baby!
I work in a large school, and we have several mums on staff who work full time with young children. We all support each other. Good luck OP! You can do it!

I'm full time with a DS 6 and DSS 11, I went back when DS was 5 months old. Me and my husband are both full time teachers (in the same school), so there are definitely tricky periods; parents eve, open evenings, ofsted is a nightmare. But huge benefits, the holidays all off together are fab. What works well for me is a small commute, means that on occasion I can pick up my son from after school club and be home by 4 and I try to do this about once a fortnight. I manage to fit in running as me time, I go one evening a week which has just become part of our routine and then try and get out at the weekend. I think scheduling in a slot of time for yourself is important and by doing it the same time every week it becomes part of life.

I'm full time with a 5 and 9yo. It helps massively that they're at my school with me so I'm there for every class assembly, sports day, celebration etc etc. In fact lots of staff have their kids there and the head is a huge advocate for family first. I rarely take work home.

I’m full time! I have 14, 12 and 4 year olds. I teach a primary class, am head of a KS so have a TLR and support other schools in my key area. I’m also doing external moderation for the LA this year so paperwork is a bit of a juggling act but I wouldn’t go back to PT (been there, done that). The things I find hardest are the children's after school activities as they are many and varied 😕, and their hospital appointments (2 of my dc have additional needs) The hardest thing for me is trying to be 100% present in my job and also for each member of the family. I really miss not being able to take my little boy to school and attend all of his special assemblies as he’s only in reception, but my school are very supportive so I go to what I deem the most important. Sometimes I feel like I’m being stretched in too many directions but c’est la vie. The holidays are a really special time for us all.

Yes, I think deciding to do something - like making time for a hobby - is almost the hardest part. And once these little baby days are past, I think it will get easier.

My school seems quite supportive of letting us take time for sports days etc, calendar / cover permitting, but I haven’t done that too much yet. My eldest starts reception in September so I’ll see how that goes then.

Even full time, I pick them up at 4.30 every day and 4 on a Friday (parents evening etc excluded) which I’d never have been able to do in my previous job in business.

There really are so many positives to hold onto, along with the fact that every other working style / option would have its downsides too.

I’m part time for now but I will be back to up FT or at the very least 0.8 in the next year or so.

I’ve done nearly five years of 0.6 secondary English and have come to the conclusion that PT only really works in a true jobshare. Otherwise the job is no smaller, you just have fewer hours to do it in and less pay for the privilege. I am fully accountable for my exam groups’ outcomes each year, even if I only teach two thirds of their lessons. I bring significantly more work home than my headteacher DH.

Loving this thread . Have had no luck looking for a PT NQT role so thinking FT may be the way to go. I struggle at home on my own all day with a 9 month old (older DC at school) and loved the buzz of working when I was doing my PGCE

How have you been getting on OP? I'm currently debating FT vs PT. Two DC 9 & 4 and a supportive but sadly often absent DH. I'm just getting so tired of not feeling like I have any scope for promotion or progression as am PT . Wondering if I would be mad to try it when I dont "have" to.

I’m a full time and have two DC aged 5 and 2. My youngest has quite complex health needs that means he needs surgery at fairly regular intervals. I’m SLT as well and it can be very hard.

But a few things make it just manageable. My DH (also a teacher) works part time and we pay my Mum to have the DC on the other days. My Mum is amazing and will do a lot of the emotional load stuff like replying to party invites and remembering the 50p for dress up days etc. If we run out of milk in the morning, she will pick some up and I won’t have to have a million little things running around my head constantly.

It also helps that I work for a HT who also has young children. My school is generous with time off for sports days / nativities etc and have been really understanding when I have needed time off for hospital appts and surgeries.

It’s still really hard and I occasionally feel very guilty about not being the primary caregiver. But I do enjoy my job.

I'm full time after doing 4 days for a couple of years. I do the same amount of work for more money so it suits me! I love my job and go stir crazy during the holidays so it was definitely the right choice for me (single mum with one DD aged 6 plus an amazing childminder who is happy to have DD late where needed.)

Nice to hear some updates! Things have gotten better here. My kids are super happy at the childminders (being able to pick them up by 4.30 is such a plus for me, but the 5yo often kicks off because she’s having fun and doesn’t want to come away yet 🙄). The extra money is helpful, especially- being all grown up about it - thinking about pension, as I’m a career changer and didn’t start teaching til I was in my 30s. The job itself in some ways gets easier every year and that I feel so passionate about it makes a big difference.

The other thing that’s made it much more doable for me is a supportive school / department. I think that’s the make or break factor, really.