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The staffroom

Whether you're a permanent teacher, supply teacher or student teacher, you'll find others in the same situation on our Staffroom forum.

Original poster

Ten parents evenings a year - this is fucking stupid!

143 replies

10istoomany · 23/04/2019 20:11

It's infuriating because the logistics it causes me in childcare is horrendous, but aside from which it is surely not reasonable?

The problem is that the PE doesn't technically start until 4:30 and goes on until 6:30, so two hours, but there's an hour and a half of trapped time in there.

OP posts:
Original poster
10istoomany · 25/04/2019 20:00

What Nellie? Confused

Whether I am in the right job or not is beside the point as I am not going to make my kids homeless am I?

I have had the last 3 pages of people whining at me

OP posts:
unicorncupcake · 25/04/2019 20:01

I will have done 12 parents evenings this year, plus reports every half term for every child. I am leaving at the end of this term!

eastertulip · 25/04/2019 20:02

I'm sorry, OP. That does sound stressful. I have a job related to teaching, and all of the research on behaviour management is agreed that the SLT has to take a fair and consistent response. If the SLT are dis-engaged it won't work. It really is impossible when you only have carrots and no sticks. (I am a massive advocate of carrots, but they don't work in isolation.) I get that you'd rather not have 10 PE. My kid's school only has 1 each year group.

My kids are fine, I always wonder if teachers want me to attend and be supportive and interested, or stay away.

I have to do open days at the university on Saturdays. I complain about those.

Mistressiggi · 25/04/2019 20:03

Nellie ODFOD. The child threw a book at her
Is that how your darlings behave at school?

notacooldad · 25/04/2019 20:07

10 I’m surprised that a school would go 4 months without sending a report home - at my school I think we send 5 a year
I was surprised and a bit angry at the time as there was no indications that we were aware of. No letters, no phone calls. I did say that the school made a huge emphasis on the parents and school working together but how could we do that if you don't let us know what's going on.The lad had detentions but told us he was either walking home from school ( an hour and hzlf) and would get a taxi home!!!!
Anyway all is good. He's a working man now but was a pain at times. Never missed a day of school ( literally 100% from juniors right the way to the end if secondary )but did naff all when he was there!!🙄

cantkeepawayforever · 25/04/2019 20:10

10,

I was just wondering what 'the norm' is for Parents' Evenings in a secondary school? In an all-through 11-18 school, I presume that many teachers in the smaller departments would attend at least 7, and perhaps 9 as the exam years might have 2?

So in an 11-16 school I suppose the minimum would be 5, perhaps 6 if there was an extra one for the exam year? Would that be the norm?

DC's school seems to do either 1 per year group plus a full written report, or 2 but no written report.

i can see that those extra parents' evenings must be the final straw, but it does sound as if it is the other aspects of the role which are the ones that are REALLY getting you down. Are you OK?

Piggywaspushed · 25/04/2019 20:11

OP did you post a few months ago under a different user name. Are you the HOD whose line manager is unsupportive?

Original poster
10istoomany · 25/04/2019 20:12

IME most teachers teach most year groups.

That's not unusual.

So in an 11-16 school it's ten parents evenings and it feels pretty relentless tbh.

OP posts:
Ginger1982 · 25/04/2019 20:14

It sounds as though the parents evenings are kind of 'the straw that broke the camel's back' and that, in reality, there are a lot of other issues you're struggling with.

Wolfiefan · 25/04/2019 20:20

I made you cry? Confused
You need a new job.
I taught for nearly 20 years.
You’re confusing poor behaviour in class (which management needs to address) with hours worked and what’s expected of you.
You can’t come at this from the point of view of you managing childcare. You need to look at your contract, speak to management, try and manage your workload and stop spending your money on students. Are you in a union?
OP others aren’t whining. You are. If you’re that negative about your job you need to get out.

TheEmojiFormerlyKnownAsPrince · 25/04/2019 20:20

The insidious creeping horror of academisation is one of the most hideous things to happen in schools

Cleanmywindows · 25/04/2019 20:25

You are coming across as a tiny bit unreasonable.

10 parents evenings over a whole year is less than one evening a month? I'm sure there are things youd rather be doing but I wouldn't describe a once a month event as relentless.

Having kids in class who don't want to do the work sounds pretty normal also, although obviously frustrating.

Having said that, you obviously feel how you feel. If you don't want to change careers, or job roles it might have to be your attitude that gets adjusted. I'm not sure what other options there are.

Faithless12 · 25/04/2019 20:29

@agteacht I agree that sometimes with any job you have to stay late. Although I have never had to stay until 10pm twelve times in a year other than when I was teaching. I also taught 7-13 but sixth form were on the same night. Plus if I’ve stayed late, I’m told to come in late, that just doesn’t happen in teaching.

Faithless12 · 25/04/2019 20:34

@notacooldad that is terrible from the school and the teachers point of view. Nothing at Parents evening should be a surprise. If his behaviour is/was terrible that should be communicated to the parents prior to parents evening. I personally think the opposite is true as well, as teachers we are quick to call home when it’s about bad behaviour but not for good behaviour.

DumbledoresApprentice · 25/04/2019 20:37

I mean this kindly OP. I really don’t think the parents evenings are the problem. Two per year group is high but not unheard of. Having said that your school sounds like an awful place to work. Honestly, applying for a new job might sound like more hassle than it’s worth but your job is clearly making you miserable. As I said before, we have a similar number of parents evenings but behaviour is good, staff at looked after, we have a light-touch marking policy, no written reports, teacher emails are not given out to parents and parental emails are only forwarded on when they can’t be dealt with by admin or other support staff. The workload isn’t that bad everywhere. Get out.

BigBooBoo · 25/04/2019 20:38

Honestly just do everything that you can to leave teaching, the grass is greener. Downsize your property, move to another area, anything!

BogglesGoggles · 25/04/2019 20:42

It would be fine, most people I know work all evenings every week. But they get paid properly. Unlike teachers. You have my sympathies OP. Sometimes I think it would be better for everyone if schools did it all on a Saturday or something instead. Or if they didn’t bother for older children unless necessary (it mostly isn’t with older kids to be honest).

notacooldad · 25/04/2019 20:52

Faithless12
I wasnt impressed and got a metaphorical kick up the arse and I became a pain in the ass parent by getting the lad on permanent report until he left school. It worked and thank God the school days are behind us and ended up a grafter and has had a good job since he left.

notacooldad · 25/04/2019 20:54

*faithless, I meant HE got a kick up the arse!!!

Jane1727 · 25/04/2019 20:54

Don't teach then!

Mistressiggi · 25/04/2019 20:56

OP has never said that the only evenings she works late are the parents nights

notacooldad · 25/04/2019 21:05

OP, I'm another one that is not a teacher but you have my sympathies.
I go to a lot of CIN meeting in school and quite frankly the vlolence and the language that I have seen against teachers is unbelievable an horrible.
Of course there are loads of lovely teenagers and I work with them as well but it only takes one or two to make the class hell.
I've sat in a CIN meeting wit a SW an IRO, a parent a teacher and the child has said things like ' yeah, well I fuckin' kicked off because Sir, wouldn't let me out and I needed a fag, that's why I then a chair at him , fuckin' pedo'
It's outrageous, and sadly pretty normal in a lot of cases. This isn't a PRU or specialist school but regular academies or Church schools.

OP! There's got to be easier ways to earn your crust!

MsRabbitRocks · 25/04/2019 21:25

It’s such a shame when teachers can’t even discuss their own topics on their own ‘staffroom’ board without the teacher bashers having a go Hmm

Mistressiggi · 25/04/2019 21:33

I know MsRabbit. I’m going over to the Tack Room section now to tell them they shouldn’t have bought the horse if they didn’t want to pay the vets bills. Or the Forces Sweethearts to say they should LTB if they are lonely as they knew what they were getting into.

donquixotedelamancha · 25/04/2019 21:47

Well this has been a very lengthy thread with little use. @10istoomany, if I may make some suggestions:

  1. Stop replying to stuff you don't like and focus on facts only.
  1. Are you on normal teachers pay and conditions? If not clarify for us all what you are on, or no one can help.
  1. Assuming you are on TPAC then get a copy of your directed time budget.

The following is supposition (but it will be right):

  1. They will fob you off on the directed time. Set a week's deadline to get it then write your own (I have a spreadsheet if you like).
  1. You will be way over. You have probably done your contracted extra hours already this year.
  1. Stop doing anything extra once you have done your directed time for the year (unless it directly benefits students and you want to). You are not even being paid for the pointless crap you are doing.
  1. Have the regional union rep come in for the meeting where you tell them this.
  1. I bet you don't do it. It will make you a better teacher and you owe it to your kids, but most teachers chicken out. Prove me wrong.