Is this unprofessional?

[missfoster]

I have name changed and would like advice on this Hypothetical situation....

Pgce student, female in early 20s is being mentored by experienced female teacher in mid 30s. PGCE student is doing well but at points finds it tough and in particular has classes that are pushing the boundaries. Student gets lots of support from mentor.

At the end of an especially hard day, PGCE student cried and mentor comforts her and gives student a cuddle.

Is this cuddling unprofessional?

Having been in a similar situation I think it shows a human side! Obviously everyone and every situation is different but I think it's fine

I'm interested that anyone could find it unprofessional. Is there a hypothetical person that has?

Not at all

I'd think it was supportive, reassuring and just what the student needed. Assuming they have built up a relationship where it would be appropriate and appreciated, rather than a more formal relationship where is could feel awkward to either party.

Not at all.
PGCE is a bloody hard year, and having a mentor that shows empathy is so helpful.

Is there more to this hypothetical situation?

Not at all. Vet normal and caring

Nope, not unprofessional, doing a PGCE is really hard!

Not at all, mentor sounds fab

Nope, definitely not unprofessional

Nope. Sometimes we all need it. As long as the student wasn't bothered, it's not your business.

It's human. She sounds like a caring mentor. I would have appreciated it when I was training.

Generally speaking, probably not but I hope the mentor would have asked her mentee first if it was okay to give her a hug. I hate people invading my personal space and would really not like being hugged by a colleague. I used to have a manager who was very 'huggy' but she always asked first which was very much appreciated and stopped it from feeling like it was inappropriate or unwelcome.

Are you asking because you have a problem with it or the mentee has said they have a problem with it?

Well, I am the HOD but someone from SLT has commented that it is unprofessional. I understand the point re personal space but The mentee has felt very supported and is v appreciated.

Appreciative

So the mentor is fine with it, the mentee is fine with it but the member of SLT has a problem?

That is ridiculous. We are human beings not robots, where is the humility?

Yes @Mrstumbletap essentially. I always remember a deputy head holding my hand after I'd had bad news at a pregnancy scan and finding it such a humane, kind gesture, I've never forgotten it. I really don't think this is unprofessional at all, so it has rankled me.

I think some schools have gone slightly crazy over professionalism. I'm SLT now but I had my fair share of hugs as a student teacher. I think I would have left the profession without some kind of emotional support. Even now, my Headteacher would find time to grab me some tissues/chocolate/dish out hugs. This is an amazingly testing job at times, we all need to support each other.
In reference to your "hypothetical" situation, I would challenge it head on. You can't have idiots over thinking/over sexualising (or whatever) every single thing that goes on in your team. Sit them down and ask them to explain the issue.
I suppose it could be that the student teacher has said something... it seems unlikely but so does someone getting a bee in their bonnet about two consenting adults hugging,

Also what sort of person sees someone crying and doesn't offer a hug. Your hypothetical SLT annoy me. I haven't vaguely got the time to go round policing staff hugs.. maybe they need some extra work.

It’s a trainee teacher. an adult not a pupil.

We have to have humanity when dealing with our co-workers in teaching.

I've been that student and that mentor!!! And the hugger and huggee with colleagues. Sometimes a hug is exactly the Right Thing to do.

I'm a HoD with young staff - young enough to me by daughter. The other week after a fraught day one of them said to me - alone in our office - 'can I have a hug?' and I was happy to oblige.

She isn't actually very touchy feely - but she'd had a shit day and wanted some reassurance that she was doing ok. I have no problems in telling her 'actually you could have handled that better' - and equallly I have no problems in saying to her, 'you are doing fab and working hard, and sometimes kids/parents are just arseholes. Keep going - you're doing ok'.

SLT are occasionally too removed to know what it's like.

To be my daughter. Gin has been taken. A level tomorrow

I hope I have a mentor like that come September.

I am just like that trainee. Sometimes you just need a hug! And I am not a touchy feels person, at all.

The only thing I would say is, it probably shouldn’t be in view of students.

Out of interest , how does the member of SLT even know?