Can I take leave to watch my own child's nativity?

[wreckedteacher]

As the title says, can I ask for time off to watch my own children's nativities? I have to spend hours on end rehearsing my class to present their Xmas show to their parents; can I watch my own?

IME it is more likely to get approval if you come up with your own plan to cover your absence, and present it as a package:

"My LO's nativity is on x date, and I would need to be out of school from time a to time b. The first half hour of this is assembly, and i have asked P (TA or fellow teacher) whether she could keep an eye on my class that morning. I have planned and resourced the Maths lesson so that Q (HLTA) can teach it, and in return I am taking Class 8 for an hour of my PPA in order to release her to do what she would normally have done that morning. I have swapped break duties, and I should be back by 11 am for the start of English"

Present it as a solution, not a problem, with all your absence covered (it will depend on your school and how PPA works, but the easiest is often swapping your PPA time) and it is IME MUCH more likely to be permitted.

The thing is that people who don't teach choose not to use leave to see their children's nativity or assembly or whatever. It might be because they need leave to cover the school holidays but that's still a choice that person has made.
A teacher has no choice, they can't just book leave. I'm not a teacher btw but it's not the same thing at all.

The thing is that people who don't teach choose not to use leave to see their children's nativity or assembly or whatever.

I am not a teacher, i cannot chose to not book leave either

Another reason why I am never leaving my lovely school! It has always been the culture where I work that my family life is as important as anything else. My amazing head would say yes to this without even thinking twice. She'd cover my class herself if needed.
Her flexibility about things like this creates a fiercely loyal and hard working staff who are prepared to put themselves out and go the extra mile for school when necessary. Everyone wins.

Jesus Christ, you don't have to find childcare / miss your children for all the many many holidays so deal with it

To be fair, Sprogletsmum, there are lots of jobs where it simply isn't possible to book an hour or so of leave - or even an isolated day - to watch a school nativity.

Could you ask the school to put on an evening performance, or at least one after school hours, as well as / instead of the in school time one? IME it is quite rare for a 'performance' - as opposed to e.g. a class assembly - to ONLY be in school time.

A teacher has no choice

Actually they do. They chose to stay in the profession and every career has its up and down sides.

I am an ex teacher an only am no longer teaching due to I'll health.

you don't have to find childcare / miss your children for all the many many holidays

As a teacher, i absolutely recognise the fairness of this point. It is the only thing that keeps many of us in teaching one of the great benefits of the job, and IMO compensates for the absolutely all-consuming nature of the job, and its inflexibility, during term time.

So being able to go to see the nativity in another school is a privilege, a favour, not by any means a right. If approached with that mindset, you could be positively surprised - but if you can't go, rejoice at all the things you DO get to do with your children, rather than focusing on the things that you don't - and get your OH / grandparents / family friends / whoever to attend the Nativity in your stead.

I can't even watch the evening performance of my child's nativity play because I have to supervise my class's evening performance (different schools). I can't get to the daytime performance as I'm teaching. It sucks, as DH, also a teacher has an evening performance at his school too, so she will have nobody watching her. I know I have to miss things like assemblies and sports days because of being a teacher, but on this occasion I am having to put school ahead of my family in the evening too.

Oooops!! Sorry

Why are non teachers commenting on this? It's a staffroom thread

Ah and so the "teachers get so much holiday" comments have started.

Most of the summer holidays I spend in school planning, sorting the classroom out, training etc so still need childcare.

My DD is in a private nursery and the nativity is at 4 so that would be possible for a teacher, if close by.
The EYFS play at my DS school has 3 showings incurring a 6 pm.

Why are non teachers commenting on this?
In my case because I can demonstrate how my DCs' school/nursery could have accommodated you.

Why are non teachers commenting on this? It's a staffroom thread

It's an open forum on the internet

A teacher has no choice, they can't just book leave. I'm not a teacher btw but it's not the same thing at all.

Many other people are in that situation and can’t dictate their shifts/hours or when they are able to take leave. It sucks, but it’s not unique to education.

The upside of working education is not having to juggle those school holidays. Missing the school things definitely sucks, and I sympathise. But the notion that all other workers are at liberty to choose exactly when to take leave is a bit odd.

If you’re not sure the main issue will obviously be staffing. Can you check the school diary for what’s on when your dd’s play is and try to think of a good way to make your absence as minimally disruptive as possible? Can you swap PPA for example or if you’re pt swap days with the other teacher? Or double up for xmas play practice; have a HLTA supervise a simple activity? If you go with a plan you’ll be more likely to get a yes than if you just ask.

I’ve worked in 4 different schools and have always been allowed to watch nativities etc. Perhaps it helped that it’s never been more than a 20 mins drive, meaning I’m only out for a couple of hours at a time. Max. Mostly because of reasonable heads. Once because I gave them no choice.

As a teacher, i think it is entirely reasonable for a non-teacher to comment on this - for example, to point out that many non-teachers find the timing of school productions very difficult, or to demonstrate how many other schools manage to time performances in working parent friendly ways (OP, does your school do evening performances, so fellow teachers who are parents of your pupils can attend? If not, suggest it, as if it becomes the local norm you will miss fewer events).

I do also happen to think that pointing out the balance - that yes, termtime leave is impossible, but while the holidays are not all work-free, they are at least more time to spend with your family than is the norm - is fair, because it is easy to see the disadvantages of a job when inside it, less easy to appreciate some of the advantages.

Let's face it, even if all of us worked half of every holiday - which IME is pretty much the norm for teachers - we would still have more than the 5 weeks of holiday that the vast majority of working adults have each year.

Or in other words what cantkeep said

My old school (Primary) always allowed us time out for assemblies / nativities / awards. Schools my friend’s work in also seem to do the same.
If they expect parents to attend the ones at your school, they should allow you time out to watch your child.

There are dozens of jobs that put a bar on booking leave through December, not just teaching.

My school will consider these type of requests and often grant unpaid leave which I think is fair enough.