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TA driving me crazy
10

southernharp · 26/09/2017 09:37

Bear with me. This could be a bit long. I have not been well this year. Suffering from depression and very stressed. Have taken some time off. First time I have taken time of any significance (apart from maternity leave 11 years ago) in the 14 years I have been working at this school. Some parents have been very difficult about me taking time and I have had lots of hassle and criticisms from some quarters, which has not helped my mental health at all. I have a TA who is the grandmother of one of my class. Her daughter is a parent who is increasing my stress. The TA has been with me for 6 years. She started great but in recent years has become interfering, undermining and reluctant to do work that she considers 'beneath her'. Drives me a bit mad, but I try to be patient . I have heard from a reliable source that she is constantly making comments about me to anyone who will listen. Along the lines of 'harp should be over this all by now' and 'it's the children I worry about' and 'that class needs some stability' . Lots of whispering about me to relieving teachers and parents.

Now, I am thoroughly tired of it all and I have concluded that the toxicity of the environment isn't helping me. I used to love my job at this school, but no longer. So I decided to apply for some new jobs and I have been offered three! Without wanting to blow my own trumpet, they were falling over themselves to offer me something. I feel really positive about this and think it could well be a turning point for me. I have accepted a job at a lovely new school with a great reputation and the loveliest children. And I have been given a leadership role. Do I confront my TA at some point or at least let her know that I am well aware of what she has been saying and of how unhelpful this has been to me? Whenever I think about her whispering and undermining I feel so cross.

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HelpfulHermione · 26/09/2017 09:46

No. Be the better person, lift your chin and rise above the pettiness.

Congratulations on your new job!

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honeysucklejasmine · 26/09/2017 09:48

I wouldn't, but if your school does exit interviews I would raise it then. They can't afford to lose teachers because of a TA.

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southernharp · 26/09/2017 10:08

No exit interviews, sadly.

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MiaowTheCat · 26/09/2017 10:43

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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TheRollingCrone · 26/09/2017 17:52

I would - people like her are psychic vampires. She deserves be called out. Good luck in your new post, I'm sure you'll be really happy Flowers

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Lowdoorinthewal1 · 26/09/2017 18:00

Why are these TAs not being put on capability and removed? School hours jobs are like hen's teeth so it's not like they are hard to replace.

Can't believe you had a relative of a child in the class as your TA. Shock. None of the parent TAs in my school are allowed anywhere near their own kid's class.

Congratulations on the new job. Sail off and enjoy.

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Saucery · 26/09/2017 18:04

I wouldn't stoop to her level and confront her. It will only give her something else to gossip about when you've gone.
You're going on to better things and you've managed that while dealing with some horrible personal issues. That's the only revenge you need.
Good luck in your new job Flowers

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AssassinatedBeauty · 26/09/2017 18:23

I would feed it back to your line manager as the reason that you are leaving, and I would feed it back to her line manager before you go in order that her behaviour is challenged. But I can appreciate that this is a fairly confrontational approach. She's driven you out of your job though, and contributed to your health issues, so I think she needs dealing with!

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Chottie · 27/09/2017 01:33

I would not stoop to her level either. All the whisperings you have heard are 3rd party repeats. What is to stop her denying everything?

Congratulations and enjoy your new job.

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TheSnowFairy · 01/10/2017 22:49

Look at it this way - if you hadn't had the 'push' you would never have gone for the better job.

Congratulations Star

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