Not cut out for this

[StrugglingTA]

How long do you give a new class/job role before you decide you just can't do it.
I am coming home complaining and in tears tonight and DH says I should ' jack it in because all I do is moan'. I know if I did this we would struggle a lot financially but I'm so unhappy at the minute.

I can't even put my finger on what's making me so unhappy as I enjoy being with the children. I love explaining stuff to them. I love it when they get it. But our class is tricky. As well as a third needing support to even write the date we have at least 3 with medical needs and AD/Adhd. They do not have one to one support. I'm one of 2 TAs in the class but as the other one has been working with this class and teacher forever I feel like I'm a cuckoo in the nest. I am making mistakes at the minute i know that. I don't know the way they work or their system. At no time has the teacher ever made me feel this way I have to say.

I just can't do it and I also have to provide interventions and show progress. It all seems overwhelming and I don't know what to do. I am exhausted and is only week 2😮

Do I give it time or give up as im not made of the right stuff?

I don't really as she is very busy, it's a very full on timetable and the class seems quite demanding. The other TA is always in much earlier and much later than me (hours are 9-3, I tend to do 830-330) Also i think it would further highlight my ineptness against the other TA!

Going to ride out the rest of the week and just try not to burst into tears today!

You sound like me, you're your own worst critic. I bet no one else is thinking about you like this. Give yourself a break.

In some ways youre putting the cart before the horse. The relationships with the other adults will be developed over time (or won't, because not all adults get on). The teacher /line manager has a responsibility to you to tell you the things you need to know to get on with your job.

• class list /groupings
• planning for lessons so you know what youre expected to do
• behaviour management system

You aren't in competition with the other TA, and if that person is working over and above paid hours that is their choice. You need to (in the nicest possible way) remember that you are an adult in the classroom, you are in a professional role, and you have an expectation to be spoken to respectfully. If these things as aren't happening you need a meeting to discuss the settling in issues, with a plan to work out how you can get up to speed. Being afraid to talk to the teacher and hiding in the loo is not addressing the issue for you.

Are you sure you're not getting negative vibes from the other adults. Otherwise I think maybe you're expecting too much of yourself. Handling SEN children is by definition a bit hit and miss. Sometimes something you try will work other times it won't. The same thing may not work the next week. Is the other TA super confident. That can really undermine your confidence I find.

How was today op?

It's Friday! I made it to the end of the week 😊
Not sure if it has been any better and I'm not any more confident but across the year group none of us feel the week has gone well. I'm being observed next week, I hope that I don't get it too badly wrong and it isn't too crushing
I have managed to catch a cold though which I think is an achievement by week 3!!!

Well done! Hope you've had a good weekend, and good luck for tomorrow.