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Getting married / name change
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chamenanged30 · 24/08/2017 10:00

I'm starting at a new school next week and then getting married in just week 5 of term. Wwyd re name? I'm really excited about using my married name but don't want to confuse the children.

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chamenanged30 · 24/08/2017 10:03

Oh and is it really awful to ask for some pre wedding unpaid leave given I've not even started yet? Blush

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Bishybarnybee · 24/08/2017 10:07

I'd probably use your new name from the start, even though that will feel a bit weird to you.

I think it is unlikely you will get any unpaid leave agreed. It's very rare in schools, Heads don't like giving it, and it's very early in your new job to be asking.

Most teachers choose to get married in a school holiday because of this. It might be different if you had flagged it up at interview stage, but really wouldn't go down well to ask at the start of a new job.

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chamenanged30 · 24/08/2017 10:13

I told the head at interview and again when accepting my job and his job offer letter details the date of my wedding. It's a private school.

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emochild · 24/08/2017 10:20

I'd go with your married name from day 1

I know people get married in the summer holidays and use their married name on transition day before the summer -so no change for the children

I also know people with really complicated surnames so use a completely different name at school

Unpaid leave I'd say your chances are slim to nonexistent

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chamenanged30 · 24/08/2017 10:25

Well he's just been chatting about it with me. (I've come in to prep). Asked if I've got my dress sorted etc which is nice so I know he knows iykwim.

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Bishybarnybee · 24/08/2017 11:31

Well ask him then.....

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chamenanged30 · 24/08/2017 12:30

Bottled it. There's a form to fill in apparently so I'll do that nearer the time

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Cakesprinkles · 24/08/2017 15:13

I think it's highly Unlikely that you'll be given any extra unpaid leave for your wedding if you've only been at the school 5 weeks. Do you work Saturdays? When I worked in a boarding school that had Saturday lessons we were allowed discretionary leave to go to weddings/important events on Saturdays with plenty of notice as the head realised that most weddings and family events happened at weekends.

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PotteringAlong · 24/08/2017 15:14

I got married at October half term and I changed my name in the September. Far too much hassle to do it once the school year has started.

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PotteringAlong · 24/08/2017 15:15

And I would say you've got no hope of pre-wedding unpaid leave.

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chamenanged30 · 31/08/2017 15:55

I've got 1.5 days leave on top of my part time contract so I actually get 2.5 days Smile

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SenecaFalls · 31/08/2017 16:05

How old are these children? Unless they are tinies, they should be able to adjust to the change.

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socktastic · 05/09/2017 22:48

I did 8 weeks at new school as maiden name then changed after I got married. Didn't see it as confusing the kids at all (although one kid, 3 years in still yells out 'hi miss sock!' Whenever she sees me!)

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CarrieBlue · 07/09/2017 08:14

If there's a form to fill in do it now - give as much notice as possible that you would like some leave. Asking too close to the time you want isn't fair on the school

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Mistressiggi · 11/09/2017 22:07

Of course getting married doesn't actually necessitate a name change, so your thread title is a bit confusing.

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