If a student questioned the way you apply your rules in their class...

[CharlotteCollins]

... How would you respond?

This is during the class. My instinct is that it's not acceptable, but I am too quick to question myself. And I don't want to send someone out and then be made to feel I've overreacted.

I've just changed jobs in the hope that a different school would be better. It is better, but there's still that constant negotiation about behaviour. Of course there are school rules and policies, but when it comes down to it there are lots of allowances that dilute the impact. I called for support with a difficult class yesterday (in my last year they were nearly all tremendously difficult) and one of the things the HT suggested to me was that get respond well to Mars Bars as rewards

That kind of approach goes against my principles. Apart from the obvious misgivings about bribery and healthy schools, why would I reward a couple of usually disruptive pupils who had decided to toe the line for a change, and not the quiet ones who are just waiting to get on with it? And if I rewarded all but the disruptive element, that's a couple of quid on Mars Bars per lesson!

After 15 years, I'm ready to concede that teaching isn't for me. Perhaps I'm just not personable enough. I don't want to spend my time coaxing and cajoling kids to what they just have to get done, or no progress / result.

She said it as if it was an obvious strategy. I like the HT from what I've seen of her in terms of the way she manages staff, but my heart dropped at that suggestion.

Do you have ideas or plans of something to do instead, Jennifer? (Yes, I'm looking for ideas!)

I don't really. I live in a small rural town and I'm never going to earn half what I do as a teacher. Unfortunately I lost out to an NQT in the local school I really wanted to work in. I'm thinking about getting some generic business / accounting qualifications.

That said, the couple of shocked responses to my earlier post has validated my pov, and I'm going to see what happens if I stand my ground. Didn't stand a chance of that working in my last school, in the face of total denial from SLT. At least in this school behaviour is generally better.

Euphemia Your school sounds like it might be in the area I grew up in!

Actually another thing I sometimes say when they say "but Billy was talking too" is to look confused and say "oh no don't worry, you're not in trouble because of him talking, you're only in trouble because of YOU". They don't really have an answer for that.

Or sometimes if they mutter "that's pathetic" I chirpily say "oh no you're not pathetic, you just made a mistake!" They then clarify "no I was saying this is pathetic!" and I just airily repeat "Ohhhhh I thought you were saying that about yourself!" And just wander off.

Psychological warfare? Don't feel sorry for them by the way, these are often kids the police spend evenings chasing around and getting lip from.

And unfortunately also the ones who won't meet their targets, resulting in loss of pay increase for us (see my post on AIBU).

Euphemia that sounds like a very badly managed school, surely there is some system of warnings followed up by break/lunchtime detentions, what happens if they do something serious like hurt another child?
I work in a school with ten times as many pupils and no pupil, not even our most smart arse year 6s would get away with walking out on me if I had told them they needed to stay in. Luckily I know that if they even tried to do it a member of SMT would haul them in, they'd be put in lunchtime detention and made to apologise to me.

It's a ridiculous and short-term money-saver. It means that there is no support or discipline system that can work. This leads to the teachers feeling (and being) unsupported in what is a difficult job, which will lead to them being unhappy and wanting to leave. Then there is a recruitment problem. Then there is the fact that the children, due to the lack of supported discipline, are not able to be taught as effectively as they should. This leads to poorer outcomes and has a knock-on effect on their own future choices as well as the economy generally if there are other schools sharing the same stupid model.

OP - are there no schools in the area where you can rely on more back up than a busy secretary?!

A bounty = account, of course.

Jennifer - I feel for you. A behaviour policy only works if everyone is singing from the same hymn sheet and you are essentially being undermined and not supported.

Can't believe an SLT member brought a pupil back in and told you she couldn't sit at the front! That's outrageous.

Our school has it's faults and maybe a deputy head would have privately thought another strategy might work BUT they would have discussed it with you privately and not blatantly undermined your authority like that. That's shocking tbh.

Euphemia I'd try and get the football "unbanned", regardless of the size of your school. I've had years when I actually took them for football (dinner ladies refused), because it led to a lot fewer issues with behaviour at lunchtimes and a lot less trouble for me to sort out after.

I also don't tend to have children questioning my rules. There are only four rules in my classroom. They are more than capable of following them.

We can send out, though. They will go to a partner class (as written in the school's behaviour policy) and sit there for a few minutes. Any more poor behaviour and they get to do lunchtime detention with SLT (so sometimes that's with me...great). In the past, I've had someone refuse to leave the room. They were collected by the deputy or our headteacher and suitably bollocked, followed by parents being asked for a chat and child being put on SLT report. I refuse to enter into a discussion at that point.

I do take minutes at break or lunchtime off children for poor behaviour, but they tend to be minor things...a little silly behaviour, which has stopped us from getting on with our work, or a silly comment shouted out. If they are unlucky and I happen to be on duty shortly after they've been annoying, they can stand outside on the playground with me and watch their friends play.

On the flipside, I try to make a point of letting parents know when their children have been lovely, worked hard, set a good example and done themselves proud.

I point out they have misinformed if they think my classroom is a democracy, it is in fact a dictatorship. At the very least it distracts from the current behaviour and on to another subject