Help - day one, already cried! how am I going to this?

[VeryEarlyDays]

I work in a specialist unit. I have a new team and some new pupils and I'm pregnant. It's tough and I need some good ideas.
The needs of my pupils mean that it's not the classic "X is kicking off so get out the way" situation and certainly not "miss is pregnant be gentle". Behaviour can be far more unpredictable. One girl walked up to me as I was at the front of the class today and slapped me with full force round the face. The biggest problem is I cried!!! I think its a hormones thing it just shook me up. Hopefully the kids didn't see but my team did. I can't spend the next 20 odd weeks crying....
Anyone been in a similar situation. I feel like I'm going to be letting everyone down. What can I reasonably ask management to do? Any good tips for dealing with a lively group as I get more unwieldy...

Sorry I'm not a teacher but...is it normal to be slapped at work?

I know it sounds extreme but yes it is fairly normal. To put a bit of context these are pupils with severe learning needs - not naughty kids or kids with no boundaries etc. We do use positive handling techniques (heaven forbid it's called restraint) to ensure pupils do not hurt themselves or others - e.g. we might (carefully and safely) hold a child whilst the rest of the group left the room or "escort" them out to a safe space. It's not something I thought too much about before I was pregnant, the odd bruise is par for the course.

PP - It's normal in some circumstances, yes. Someone is going to work with challenging children. There will be times, sometimes lots, when they slap (and worse, of course).

OP - sounds like a tough day. It might be hormonal. How did you used to react to and feel about your students? Can you tell your team how you're feeling? Mine are all hard as nails but would rally round in an instant if I were feeling vulnerable.

You need to get a risk assessment done and stick to it.

I work with similar pupils and remember the hormone induced tears when they got rowdy. I had to hide in the staff room and bawl my eyes out when one lashed out at me when pregnant when I'd normally have taken it in my stride .

When I was pregnant, in a similar setting, I made specific risk assessments around each pupil. One had particularly challenging episodes, directed at my bump, and for a time we ensured we were not in the same room. We did calmer, more predictable, favoured activities together.

Do you have some more predictable students? Can you avoid working directly with the less predictable? You're still planning, preparing etc, so not abandoning them.

Would there be anything you could do with your environment to help give you more time to have another member of staff come between you and child?

Maybe you could teach from behind a desk and have a member of staff at each end of the 'horse shoe' of children in front of you so they could always intercept a child coming your way (not ideal I know, but might help you feel less in the line of fire).

I was CharlesRyder btw but lost my username during 'the attack'.

for the bad day. It's the start of term- they will settle.

I have a child who regularly comes for me when I'm class teaching. I have my group table tilted round so his 'corner' is close to the calm room door. A TA usually sits on my side of him and if he gets up looking cross the TA just gently guides him to the calm room door.

I work with SN pupils and I would hope that your team wouldn't see crying as a weakness. My team, especially senior leadership, always check we're ok, send you out for a cuppa / breather if you've been involved in an incident.

TBH I don't think the kids seeing you crying would always be a bad thing. It could be a learning point about other people's emotions, the consequences of their actions. (Obviously I don't know if this is appropriate with your children's needs?)

It is bloody hard, but if you school has a behaviour system stick to that like glue. And rewards / praise / bribery / distraction can get you surprisingly far! Even though it's exhausting, especially when they're being horrors. Please don't beat yourself up, it's only day one.

We have a code word at our school. If you call the office, or you send a student with the office with a note with a certain word contained on it then one of the senior team will arrive and find some reason for you to leave the room (phone call, parent, meeting, etc) and will take over from you for a while when you go for a cup of coffee, cry, scream, throw things, etc. Even the most experienced teacher may need a time out sometimes. Especially dealing with students with high needs, this might be something work incorporating with your school.

Thank you! Lots of really helpful suggestions. It's really nice to hear from others who understand. I get a lot of "you shouldn't have to put up with that" sort of attitude from friends and family and whilst i know that comes from a place of love its really not very helpful and means you just end up defending your pupils and feeling rubbish.
Had a much better day today, still got slapped but felt more in control and used some new strategies which made a difference.
Teaching behind a desk made me . I should have mentioned that they are all working below national curriculum and many are non-verbal. Sitting behind I desk i really would be Charlie Brown's teacher waaa waaa waa waaa...
Have a great weekend

Sorry! Not a very appropriate strategy then. Mine are all cleverer than me very high functioning but very challenging.

Glad you had a better day and felt more in control.

I reckon we've all cried at times unexpectedly in the face of sudden whacks from pupils! Nothing to be ashamed of. I found sometimes it was tears of frustration when things had seemed calm/nice. Staff all need to be allowed time to recover/have a cuppa/dry their eyes in these situations. Keep a close eye on stress levels, make sure you keep talking to your line manager and don't feel bad if you need to change roles/go off on medical grounds as your pregnancy progresses. Ongoing risk assessments too.

My friend was transferred to a different lower risk unit for her last trimester- an option?