When the WHOLE frickin family come to parents evening

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and then discuss the whole family history of who liked what subject or ( more likely) was crap at it, thereby lowering all the aspirations of the kid

FGS - one of you stay at home with the preschoolers, the other one bring a notepad

YABU about the whole family coming

YANBU about the discussion.

Why shouldn't both parents hear what is said?

Having said that, ds parents evening is on Monday (year 7) , my mum is babysitting so that we can go without the younger siblings, even though I know that they can sit and read while we talk.

In primary, the whole family often comes. I put out construction and colouring etc for that reason.
I doubt that it's the only time they discuss how bad, useless or essential the subject has been in their own lives and that it has impacted on the aspirations of the child you teach. One more brief burst isn't going to make much of a difference.

Or when it's mum and nan and you know straight away you're in for a revelation about terrible divorce and abusive dad. In front of the kid. "Oh I see. How awful. Erm...Johnny needs to remember to proof read, really..."

I once had an older sibling brought along, who proceeded to sit on Mum's knee (sib was about y8) while parents berated younger DC in every respect. Younger DC was a delight to teach and all round lovely child!

At DD last school I was waiting to go in when one of the other mums turned up with all four kids (one toddler, the others YrR, 1 & 3) and 3 fathers...then proceeded to ALL go into the classroom.

DDs teacher caught my eye and just shrugged. I waited for another half an hour.

Depends a bit what you mean by whole family. Both parents - fine. Both parents, both stepparents, variety of younger children - less fine.

I still don't see the problem, but then I tend to keep to time whoever turns up. One parent or the entire clan, you get 10 minutes.

I've had to take siblings along before, if no alternative available, but that's because dh is away with work! I wouldn't dream of it if both of us were around - one go, one stay with dc, surely?

Ds has to come along to dd1's parent meetings, but they are during the day, and no one bats an eyelid -dd1 is at SN school. Whatever ds gets up to formthe hour or so we are talking doesn't matter - the staff have seen it all before!

ok so say an 8 year old has to come, I dont see why they arent left with the noisy ipad they are invariably using on the seats 2 metres behind the conversation. OH no they have to suddenly sit on the lap of the parent and totally distract all of us

or the kid says I dont like PE ( or whichever subject you dont teach them) and the parent says ' Yes you do' THIS GETS MY GOAT

i have had 4 adults before for one measly kid.

If both XH and I have been at parents evening either the DC sit outside the classroom or they've been at home. Can't see why they'd enhance proceedings if they were there tbh.

Really?
I just see them as a marathon that has to be endured with a reboot every 10 minutes.
Paperwork-check
Positive input-check
Next step in learning-check
Sheet for notes and comments-check
Quick swig of vodka-check
And smile....

4 adults for one child, if that is both parents and stepparents, I think YABU. If it is a 50/50 split then I think they are all invested in that child and fair enough.

If loads of other children or grandparents etc then that is the problem where I think YANBU.

For me, parents' evenings should hold no nasty surprises for the parent or the pupil.
If I need to say something serious that takes time, then I'd be arranging a meeting with the parent separately to discuss the specific problem.

I thought that was a given. I am not saying i would lurch into suggesting their kid is an axe murderer.

I don't think both step parents need to come as well as both bio parents. Can't couples communicate with one another? It's ridiculous and bloody intimidating for the teacher I'd imagine to have 4 on 1.

I take DS to parents evenings (am a single parent) but he sits in the corridor with an ipod (no sound). Wouldn't dream of taking him (or indeed sundry other children) in with me.

We will take both children. We don't have family nearby and don't want to pay childcare for a 10 min meeting. Dh and I both want to hear what's discussed and show we are both interested in ds's education

Last time we went both children just read where's wally happily on a sperate table.

Four parents there is ridiculous- I mean, what are they expecting to find out?

One person goes and reports back anything surprising is surely the most efficient use of time.

with my own children, I go and take the kid with me whose parents evening it was. When they were younger at primary school I think they played outside in the playground or something or I swapped with a mate locally. Tit for tat.

I dont need H to be there to 'show the teacher' he has an interest in the childs education.

agree John Farley - I make notes if need be and report back. Mind you I am not one of those ( normally Y7 ) parents who has to see EVERY SINGLE TEACHER

All of them showing up might be that they are trying to show the child that they are all interested and involved in their education, whatever the combination of adults in their lives. ithout thinking of the inconvenience to the teacher.
Likewise, think of Y7 as a transition learning experience for parents, they are often used to a more involved role in primary, and they want to put names to faces of all the subject teachers. I did.
By the time he hit Y8, I'd learnt which teachers were a waste of space when discussing DS and which ones I wanted to see.
DD was much easier because she was a straight A for most subjects and not a problem.

Please tell me you aren't a teacher in the South of England? Your attitude is not one I want to come across.

But that's what parents evening is for, both parents. It's a chance for both to ask questions based on what the teacher says. I know that dh would ask different questions from me, so I feel it's very beneficial we both go. I think it's also nice children see both parents showing and interest in what they do

It's 10 minutes, who cares about how many show up?
I still don't see the problem. Talk 1:1, talk to a group.
Now if you were talking about intimidating behaviour and aggressive comments, that's a different thing altogether.