4 months from finishing teaching degree and already exhausted..

[avocadosarentmiddleclassed]

I am so exhausted at even the prospect of my NQT year this September... All the planning, givernment pressure, marking, time consuming resourse gathering, the expanding nature of it as a job. My degree has been long and hard and I'm so worried when I hear teachers talking about that knot of fear in their stomachs. Life's so short I can't justify being a stress ball for all of it. Please someone reassure me!

Yup-17 years in for me and can't imagine doing this for another 1, let alone 30. Are you ok, Countess? are you part time or signed off? PM me if you want a shoulder xxx

Thanks rollon. I'm full time but couldn't face the world today.

Any chance of PT or supply? Going on supply has been a joy for me.

I did supply a few years ago. I couldn't go back to it. Financially, I need to stay full time. I'm trapped.

Countless, this is what I would say to anyone at my school and what any other member of SLT should say - no matter what their own stresses or cheapness:
Please, please don't go in tomorrow, this week or for the rest of this term. Go to the doctors. Get signed off. You need some time away from school to rest before you make any decisions. Lack of sleep, not wanting to continue are clear signs that you are genuinely ill and warrant time off.
School will manage. It is your job; it is not you or your life. They will get supply and will cope. Leave them to their competitiveness. You should still get full pay for quite a while, I think, so money shouldn't be affected.
You need to rest and let yourself recover. Once you're rested, take a bit more time off. Use it to get ahead - Spring planning, start reports, whatever will help you. Give yourself chance to remember what you love about the job and perhaps to rediscover it.
I don't know how to private message (as I've lurked for a couple of years but only recently started posting) but I am here to help if I can.

I agree-go to the Dr tomorrow.

Thanks guys. Dp wants me to go in tomorrow. I don't think I will.
I'll be ok.

Deffo see the doctor. Do you mean DP wants you to go to work or to the Dr?

Have you been projecting the illusion of managing, of coping? Keeping up appearances in front of him? Or is he the sort of person that tends to push through things he's finding difficult.
Either way, if he loves you, he has no idea how close you are to breaking or he wouldn't have suggested it. Don't go in. Doctor and then if they offer counselling, go for it.
You need a complete break, and then possibly a different school. Or a different job. Or you will end up in a shuddering, non-communicative heap under a duvet. Don't push yourself to that point, please.

Thank you for your words.

Skating, you are speaking sense.

Avocados, sorry for hijacking your thread.