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The staffroom

Whether you're a permanent teacher, supply teacher or student teacher, you'll find others in the same situation on our Staffroom forum.

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Original poster

Teachers with children...

40 replies

newbiebaby · 21/10/2014 22:35

....retraining next year as a teacher, how do you all find juggling the childrens day with your own? I know I will miss out on assemblies, drop offs and pick ups because I'll need to be at my school and wondering how you 'deal' with this emotionally? Thanks

OP posts:

Philoslothy · 23/10/2014 16:44

I think it can be a great job to combine with a family, if you are determined to make it work and you will not fall into the trap of working all the hours God sends.

I became a teacher to have more time with my family. I made sure that I left work at least once a week on the bell. Being able to be home by 4pm at least once a week was a gift. I left work most other days at around 6pm, but I live near school so was home by about 6:15pm which was a similar time if not earlier than in my previous job. I also liked the flexibility that I could work once the children had gone to bed and of course I had the whole holidays to enjoy with them.

I work in the school that most of my children attend so I do go to assemblies, sports day, I even get to watch rehearsals or sports practice.

I left teaching because I knew that I would be pregnant with number six shoots still on ML with number five and I thought it was wrong to take that much time and pay out of a job when someone else could be there doing the job. I am also not one of life's hard workers so combining six children with any job was not for me.

Original poster

newbiebaby · 23/10/2014 17:36

Definitely something I want to do, have left another profession so used to working at similar level but have had more autonomy with time so think the regimentation of the school bell and seeing how much parental involvement that is expected at primary has worried me a bit! Think I'll have to go with it and deal with the events on a day by day basis rather than worrying about it all at once!?! Thanks so much for your replies

OP posts:

BellaBearisWideAwake · 23/10/2014 17:41

I'm part time (lucky to be able to to, I know, both from a money perspective and from a perspective of being able to get a part time job) and that's how I make it work. I haven't worked full time since I had DS1.
I'm lucky that assemblies day is also my day off, but also that I have very good SLT who are very happy for paid time off for these sort of things. When it wasn't my day off, I took the time with no problem. I do understand it's not like this in every school though.
Part time is also the reason I rarely work at weekends. I do marking in the evenings after DC in bed usually. I do 0.6 over 4 days.

Hulababy · 23/10/2014 17:41

Some schools are better than others.

My current primary school is sympathetic to teacher parents and does allow staff to have time out for key assemblies or shows, so long as the TA in the room is happy and able to cover (and vice versa) and it isn't excessive. They rationalise that they want parents to attend our assemblies, etc so they nee to allow our staff to do the same for their children.
I managed to go to all of DD's key shows/assemblies and even a couple of sports days. Only big one I missed was her big leavers one (though not speech day) - I was gutted tbh as it was a key event, but I was on a school trip with my school so couldn't arrange cover.

However, some hT's are not good at allowing this, so you have to be prepared to miss out on events.

CindyLou · 23/10/2014 18:04

Philoslothy - no way can anyone say you are not an incredibly hard worker when you have already combined with several DC! And I can't imagine anyone does a FT job with 6DC unless they are Helena Morrissey, earning ££££ and with a SAHP.
I also made a career change into teaching, although I was lucky in my previous career that I had a level of seniority where I was able to negotiate a term-time only office presence, and also able to work at home a lot and so did not have to miss more than the occasional assembly etc.
I had always wanted to teach, but did think it would be feasible to easily combine with young DCC for the reasons others have mentioned.
So I retrained when they were in secondary and did not want me anywhere near their school need me so much.
Even so, having seen several NQTs at their wits' end, I decide to do supply instead for a while. three years in, am loving it ( well, loved it from the start) because I can leave when the bell goes, have no planning or marking ( although when I do primary - which I am regularly booked for, even tho' not trained in it - I do make the books anyway before I go so as to save the regular teacher the burden, and because primary DC work is just lovely!
I work more than the days I would choose to, but only because sometimes if I have decided to have a day off, the agency calls up asking me to go to a school I particularly like, so I agree.
But I can work as many or as few days as I like, and always have the option never to go back if the school is horrible (very rare, and only one this year has been girls' school in a state of the art building in SW London).
Is great to be home by 4, with a book and a glass of wine gardening, with no planning/marking/data/displays to do...

Philoslothy · 23/10/2014 20:09

I have worked quite hard in the past, I am lucky enough to be in a position where I do not need to do that anymore, and because I am not somebody who wants to work hard or gets some kind of natural kick from doing so I choose to not work anymore.

Applejack2 · 25/10/2014 20:27

Hi,

I am hoping to retrain next year too. I am currently in a part time NHS profession so I have been able to attend most events at school over the last 10 years.
My eldest will be starting secondary next September so the days of nativity plays and other school events will be over. His secondary school (that he will, hopefully, get a place at) is a bus ride away so he will leave the house at 8am.
My youngest will be going into year 3 next September. Our school only does nativity plays up to year 2 so that is one thing I won't miss. As for assemblies, they seem to be dwindling off lately. We haven't been invited to one for ages. If one of us can't attend then one of the other mums will act as a 'stand in' and we help each other out. We have no other family members to help out with things like this.
Sports day is not the fun it was in my day. I wish our school would split the infants and juniors but they don't so you end up sitting through countless races and your child only runs once or twice. The children like you to go to that one though. There are quite a few parents who are teachers and they always seem to get time off for nativity plays and sports day.
It is cruel not to let teachers go to their own child's nativity play!! Surely, they can be covered for a couple of hours?
Oh, and the novelty of school drop off/pick up wears off as the children approach the higher end of the school. My son is year 6 now and, although I only pick up and drop off twice a week, he is really starting to grow up and I am starting to feel redundant! He wants to walk home with his friend and not me anymore.

bigTillyMint · 25/10/2014 20:36

I think it can depend on where you work and how flexible they are. I chose to take a step down to work in a provision near home and have been very lucky. I worked part-time for 11 years. On the days that I worked, they went to breakfast/after-school club and I was always able to slip out if necessary.

Are you training in a school or doing a PGCSE?

Phineyj · 25/10/2014 20:54

It doesn't bother me - DH and I both have a long commute so it wouldn't really be practical and if I had a non-teaching job it would be just as difficult to get the time off. I think the holidays and the fact I can pick DD up at 4 if I want to, make up for it. Also, DH's work (he's not a teacher) have been very helpful about letting him cover illness and cancelled childcare,which is much more important - definitely wouldn't want to push it for non-necessary stuff! I think schools are very unrealistic if they expect parents to go in regularly during the day. It probably helps that neither of my parents were sentimental about these things?

PrivateJourney · 25/10/2014 21:05

At our (junior) school we have several class teachers working 9:30 to 2:30 so they can do drop offs and pick ups. Classes are covered by TAs before 9:30 and after 2:30. SENCo also does 9:30-2:30.

It depends how easy the school find it to recruit and how much they want you (or mostly in our case, how much they want to keep you)

rollonthesummer · 26/10/2014 21:20

At our (junior) school we have several class teachers working 9:30 to 2:30 so they can do drop offs and pick ups.

Wow, I've never heard of this happening! Do they do this every day? What about meetings/marking etc? Or if parents need to talk to them at the gate?

Bitlost · 30/11/2014 03:40

My husband is retraining and we're finding it impossible to combine with family life. I earn 4 times what he earns, yet have to make myself late for pick ups and drop offs. He's going to quit because we can't put my job as the main breadwinner at risk. This has been the biggest mistake we've ever made.

If you're not giving up an existing career, go for it.

If you are, just don't do it.

NoelleHawthorne · 30/11/2014 04:50

Or with your vast wealth you pay someone to do it?

NoelleHawthorne · 30/11/2014 04:51

Wrt assemblies you get a good boss who lets you do the odd one / swap with a colleague

Bitlost · 30/11/2014 07:20

Noelle, I am a super dedicated mother who's working very, very hard to provide for my family. We live in London - it's not vast amount of money. What I am saying is that in my experience schools tend to put an awful lot of pressure on the non teaching partner. Our family is being destroyed by that school.

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