Would you bow or curtsy to royalty in a social setting?

[WhatWouldGinDo]

If you met a member of the RF in a social situation where you are there in the same capacity (e.g. you're another mum watching your DC play sport, or you're at a private house as you have mutual friends), should you bow/curtsy? And should you address them as YM /YRH when you're introduced.

It's not happened to me yet (only met them when they're working and therefore did curtsy/YRH them) but I've always been intrigued what people if they end up sitting next to them at the school concert.

That’s sounds interesting @Redflagsabounded where was was that? I’m fascinated by other cultures when I’ve not heard things before!

I have attended court, and also tribunals and the occasional inquest, with a judge present. Also had a glass of wine with one, socially. I am not on a legal team though, more of an expert witness kind of thing. I am amazed at the curtsy stuff though, you really curtsy to judges! I could understand maybe a little nod of the head.

Not a curtsey. A bow to each other. On rising and sitting. Not just a nod of the head.

edit: forgot to add
also if exiting or entering court room mid session then you bow as well!

Absolutely not

I probably would, out of sheer nerves/shock at suddenly realising I was watching the nativity play next to royalty. I’d mess it up of course…and make a right tit of myself! 🤦‍♀️😬

No of course not, and I'm the biggest royalist going.

Not a chance in either setting.

Why is that “funny”? I assume you mean strange, not hilarious…..

Thanks to all the people who shared about the protocol in courts. I hadn't realised how much bowing there was; I've been very interested to learn about it here.

Didn't Diana call Charles Sir when she was dating him. There is no institution or human alive that I would bow or courtesy to .

Well, it's very clear what that phrase means...

not at all that would be very odd thing to do. They are just people

Hmm. Not sure. Might if t was a big ceremonial event only for formality but otherwise probably not.

I dont like the idea that they are my “betters” it’s beyond outdated now - I’d be happy without them but I don’t have any specific dislike for any of them as people really. Not mad keen but I understand they aren’t going to turn down a life of privilege to be a “commoner”.

I’m with you

You get that these threads come up on 'Active', right? We don't sit about on the RF board, longing for a chance to debate curtseying.

As explained legal bods or those that work in courts do so. While I think no legal requirement to do so, it wouldn’t look good if you didn’t…

I remember going to church with my parents when I was a teenager. The local bishop came to visit our little church, which is a sort of catholic equivalent to a royal visit. After mass, the bishop stood at the church door & the parishoners lined up to kiss the ring on his finger. When it came to my turn, the bishop extended his hand so I shook it & said hello. I got a massive bollocking from my parents afterwards but I didn’t care. No way was I ever going debase myself like that.

If they made me a Lady, I’d hold my nose and do it. Not literally, obviously. Otherwise, no.

That's how I saw it.

I met one in a formal, ceremonial setting and didn’t curtsy. Fuck that!

I would love to curtesy to a royal, I think its quirky little thing remnant of another time. It’s not like I’m suddenly going to become a lesser person, it doesn’t mean anything. I view it like the ceremony of the keys or the rugby haka. The shipping forecast. Something with no relevance or meaning in modern life but is kept going due to heritage and tradition.

In fairness, the Royals' own website does make it clear you don't have to bow/curtsey - this is at the top of the page:

There are no obligatory codes of behaviour when meeting The King and Queen or a member of the Royal Family, but many people wish to observe the traditional forms

And later on:

... for men this is a neck bow (from the head only) whilst women do a small curtsy. Other people prefer simply to shake hands in the usual way.

My niece knew taught one of younger royal children briefly, refused to discuss the children (quite rightly!) but I got the impression no drama or special treatment was given or expected.

That makes it even cringier that they do it to each other. That the official line is it isn't required but clearly it matters desperately to the next generation so they keep doing it to ensure it is done to them in the future.

I don’t know when I see my Indian neighbours bowing down to their elderly relatives I think it’s quite sweet, much nicer than ignoring them or thinking they aren’t worthy of their time.