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The royal family

Does protocol matter?

54 replies

AmandaJonah · 07/03/2023 01:32

I am wondering if you think Royal protocol matters? For example the Palace have emailed inviting Harry and Meghan to the Coronation instead of sending them a formal printed invite. So do things like this really matter?
Does it matter what clothes they wear for example or should protocol be adhered to with that?
Can protocol be changed? Charles is changing tradition with what he wears for the Coronation. Kate has worn a dress that is off one shoulder. So do the changes matter?

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ComeTheFckOnBridget · 07/03/2023 01:39

I might be wrong I've not read in detail but the headlines I've seen say save the dates have been issued only?
Be pretty surprised if the coronation doesn't have printed invitations!

AmandaJonah · 07/03/2023 01:49

Would it matter of there were not printed invitations?

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Morestrangethings · 07/03/2023 02:40

Good question. I guess it matters in that people know what is expected of them.

I am a bit bemused about who walks behind whom, where the royals sit, and whom they sit next to. The hierarchy looks a bit weird to me in this day and age.

I think email invites are quite acceptable now. Mail invites, as nice as they are, are out of date. But perhaps the mailed invites have some security thing - a chip or an engraving that emails can’t achieve?

My grandparents were invited to our government house to meet Charles and Diana. (Their first tour will William). They kept the invite, we found it when packing up their house after their deaths. Nan was a voluble Protestant royalist, Pop was an Irish Catholic and kept his mouth shut. Nan had a photograph of the day - of her and pop and Charles and Diana.

Diana was v young and very tall and Nan is pictured cutseying - Nan was less that 5 foot tall and looked like the queen - modelled herself on the queen (clothing, shoes, bag -not the hair though). And she also smoked like a train like Margaret and liked a drink, popped a few pills. She looked like the Quuen but had the temperament of a Margaret lol.

anyway, when Nan curtsied she did a deep sweeping curtesy so she’s all bent over and looks about 2 foot high, and Diana and Charles are looking like they are very trying not to laugh. Diana was wearing a lace collar. Before she learned to dress better.

Kedece2410 · 07/03/2023 02:57

In the case of the Sussexes I'd be sending any invite via email with a read receipt. I wouldn't trust them not to play the victims AGAIN & deny receiving any (posted) invitation

SpookyBlackCat · 07/03/2023 03:09

The Royals are people just like the rest of us but they surround themselves in mystique to create this illusion that they are somehow better or more worthy than us. Protocol is a huge part of this mystique. Without it a lot of people would stop caring. It’s all smoke and mirrors really. Like the Wizard of Oz.

purpledalmation · 07/03/2023 03:34

I think royal protocol is decidedly bonkers and belongs in the 1950s when the queen came to the throne. Unfortunately she did stick rigidly to the rules her mother put in place and she lived a very long time. So the palace are stuck in a time warp. No bare legs, bare shoulders and all that. Silly in the 21st century and I hope Charles trims down the more restrictive and old fashioned rules. Kate often looks dressed as a granny, so I hope that changes.

pilates · 07/03/2023 06:06

I thought it was a save the date email? Proper invitations to follow.

Mumsnut · 07/03/2023 06:58

All the necessary instructions, like what seat is yours, what door to use, what time you have to be there, detailed dress code, security instructions, won’t fit on an engraved card. so will have to be issued separately and e-mail is the most sensible vehicle for that.

But I’m sure every attendee will get a traditional card invitation to put on their mantelpiece, where the neighbours can admire it, and in a scrapbook afterwards.

Novella4 · 07/03/2023 08:48

'Royal' protocol re addressing people as 'majesty' ( 😂), not speaking until spoken to ( give me strength!) walking in succession order into and out of church ( hilarious to watch 40 and 50 year olds do this )

  • all invented nonsense designed to create a mystique around 'royals' where none exists

Protocol just means procedure - you'll have seen it office / public buildings ' fire protocol' etc

Sweetpeasaremadeforbees · 07/03/2023 10:17

Would it matter of there were not printed invitations?

I dunno, I think it's a nice memento for those invited. I still get annoyed when I go to see a band and I get an e ticket instead of a paper one. But anyway as a pp said, I think the emails are a 'save the date' rather than an invitation. If anyone can't make it presumably they let the palace know and someone else can take their place?

Other stuff, I think some of it is slowly being relaxed. In Victoria's day I can imagine you'd be in trouble if you didn't bow or curtsey, today we absolutely don't have to. I think that for all his flaws KC is more relaxed about protocol than his mother.

Puzzledandpissedoff · 07/03/2023 11:27

Would it matter of there were not printed invitations?

I can't answer that, but haven't the least doubt there'll be printed invitations; the emails will serve to create the impression of everyone wanting to come by winnowing out those who won't accept

They do the same with honours - though I don't know if they use email for it these days - by saying your name's been submitted and asking if you'd accept (though the "level" of honour isn't mentioned at that stage)

AmandaJonah · 07/03/2023 11:41

purpledalmation · 07/03/2023 03:34

I think royal protocol is decidedly bonkers and belongs in the 1950s when the queen came to the throne. Unfortunately she did stick rigidly to the rules her mother put in place and she lived a very long time. So the palace are stuck in a time warp. No bare legs, bare shoulders and all that. Silly in the 21st century and I hope Charles trims down the more restrictive and old fashioned rules. Kate often looks dressed as a granny, so I hope that changes.

Queen Elizabeth was very traditional. You can see that just in the fact that she refused to update her hairstyle even though her hairdresser reportedky tried to persuade her.
But Kate has worn dresses with bare shoulders.

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BigFatLiar · 07/03/2023 11:48

Fir those who had large(ish) weddings did you send invitations and get replies? Most 'events' have some sort of protocol associated with them. Invites for weddings, seating plans for the wedding meal, dress code for people attending Ascot.

AmandaJonah · 07/03/2023 11:55

I have had card invitations and a paper note included giving all the details or a card invitation with a link to a website giving other details. I have never had an email invitation with the details.

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smilesy · 07/03/2023 12:01

AmandaJonah · 07/03/2023 11:55

I have had card invitations and a paper note included giving all the details or a card invitation with a link to a website giving other details. I have never had an email invitation with the details.

I doubt the email has all the details. Given that this is going to be an organisational feat that would dwarf any wedding, it’s probably necessary to sound people out in advance as to what their intentions are so that transport, accommodation, security etc can be arranged.

YetMoreNewBeginnings · 07/03/2023 12:04

Emails will just be the “you’re going to be invited” point. There will be proper invitations and seating cards issued as well.

it also gives other royal houses and political groups the opportunity to say “it’ll be X that attends” so that the invitations can be issued to the guest attending.

AmandaJonah · 07/03/2023 12:29

@smilesy I actually think it is all being left very late. I knew who was coming to my wedding at an earlier stage than Charles does.

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YetMoreNewBeginnings · 07/03/2023 12:39

AmandaJonah · 07/03/2023 12:29

@smilesy I actually think it is all being left very late. I knew who was coming to my wedding at an earlier stage than Charles does.

That’s because people actually decline weddings because they have holidays, work or other weddings.

The organisers of this know that barring something major (like when Charles wedding had to be moved because of the Pope’s death) everyone bar one or two will attend.

It’s not the same for big royals events. The people invited pretty much will all attend barring ill health or political issues in their own country.

SenecaFallsRedux · 07/03/2023 12:41

YetMoreNewBeginnings · 07/03/2023 12:04

Emails will just be the “you’re going to be invited” point. There will be proper invitations and seating cards issued as well.

it also gives other royal houses and political groups the opportunity to say “it’ll be X that attends” so that the invitations can be issued to the guest attending.

Exactly. It appears that they are trying to get an idea of who will be coming and then will follow up with a formal invitation.

There is a thread in Style and Beauty started by someone who has been emailed and has started planning what to wear.

YetMoreNewBeginnings · 07/03/2023 13:04

SenecaFallsRedux · 07/03/2023 12:41

Exactly. It appears that they are trying to get an idea of who will be coming and then will follow up with a formal invitation.

There is a thread in Style and Beauty started by someone who has been emailed and has started planning what to wear.

Thats especially important if Charles is trying to change protocol and is wanting other Monarchs to attend instead of Crown Princes and the likes.

It’ll be very to see who attends and who sticks with tradition.

Novella4 · 07/03/2023 14:03

Yeah it's funny how their precious rigid 'protocol' is suddenly abandoned when the 'royals' might need a boost
'Protocol' meant for no half mast flag for Diana - public protest - protocol abandoned

'Protocol ' for no other monarchs at a coronation- yeet that protocol out the window - foreign 'kings' guarantees foreign media

Such nonsense

Coxspurplepippin · 07/03/2023 15:12

Protocols apply to all sorts of scenarios - religion, diplomacy, travel, government. Should we just abandon them all and let chaos ensue?

AmandaJonah · 07/03/2023 15:33

YetMoreNewBeginnings · 07/03/2023 12:39

That’s because people actually decline weddings because they have holidays, work or other weddings.

The organisers of this know that barring something major (like when Charles wedding had to be moved because of the Pope’s death) everyone bar one or two will attend.

It’s not the same for big royals events. The people invited pretty much will all attend barring ill health or political issues in their own country.

So why not just send the proper invitations out then rather than an email below to see who will attend?

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MintJulia · 07/03/2023 15:39

AmandaJonah · 07/03/2023 01:49

Would it matter of there were not printed invitations?

I've been to a palace event. Save the date &rsvp came months before and then the official invitation together with instructions on where/when to arrive, dress code, assorted other things.
Protocol does matter because very large public events need to run smoothly to time, without exceptions. However H&M are family and I'm sure if they arrive inappropriately dressed etc someone will just put them behind a pillar or something. 😀

AmandaJonah · 07/03/2023 16:04

Why would they arrive inappropriately dressed? A strange comment.

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