Keeping it in the family

[Bloodthickerthanwater]

Harry forgot that blood is thicker than water.
He thought he could diss the dirt about his family and everyone would clap him for this. He actually forgot that as a family we can say what we want about our family to our closest friends and they would all just say ok but not judge them. He sadly put it out to the world and now we think he is a traitor. You do not compromise your family for money. That is what Harry has done even though he thinks it’s about telling his truth. Pity he wasn’t called Richard. Cause then we could call him Dick. Actually let’s just call him a dick. I have 3 brothers and 3 sisters. Thank goodness they could all laugh at our rows and fights. Never ever did I have to worry about 2 sausages over 3. I was thankful for half a sausage. I remember my brother scrambling under the table and trying to take my toast cause he obviously was starving. I bet Harry never was starving. 2 sausages. I would think it was Christmas

How did you determine that? Or is it just an opinion?

It’s not abuse. It’s just not airing your laundry. Did we need to know that Harry had frostbite. This is about Keeping in the family chat. As you do. Somethings don’t need to be aired. Abuse is different. But let’s be real. Brother’s fighting. Is this the dirt. My brothers fought all the time and still do. But they would all unite if someone else got involved. It is not abuse.

I remember when my kids were young and I was intent on not raising my voice and intent that my kids would not argue with each other. One day a psychologist who was a friend pointed out to me that my kids need to learn how to argue. They need to learn how to stand up for themselves and the safest way to do this is in the family home. So you might think that is toxic but really it is giving them the skills in an environment that their loved. For the wokey woke people who are reading this it is not abuse. This is life

Okay you keep everything private within the family that you say have treated you badly. Not my approach but it is your life.

I did not say my family treated me badly. That is your interpretation. Do not say what I did not say to make you sound good

@Bloodthickerthanwater I apologise. I thought you said you had a far worse time from your family than Harry. Sorry if I misunderstood.

I have an amazing family. It’s just normal shit that you deal with. in Private. The inference of abuse and toxicity is typical of the world we live in. I wish you all well in your careers cause you will struggle in the land of reality if you can’t challenge debate and disagreement

Aren’t you the same poster who started the Harry-bashing thread earlier today saying your father beat you all regularly and then walked out on the family, leaving your mother so poor you had to split a single tin of soup between all of you for tea? And that Harry shouldn’t publish a book because you didn’t and you had it far worse than him?

If that’s not you, you have an amazingly similar posting style and opinion on what does and doesn’t constitute abuse/neglect.

To be fair. Most of us would have a much worse time in our family than Harry. We did not have the cash or privelidge. That’s all I meant. Harry never had to worry about his next meal or if his mum could afford it. And he shouts off about food that a lot of us never had. Trying to be a victim. I had nothing but I would never say that to my mum. I was an impoverished child Yet I was loved

Not me

Probably where the confusion is coming from then, you have a very similar posting style, and you are both talking about the same subject.

People are remembering what that poster said about their family this morning, and assuming you are the same person.

Really. I will look at that thread

All I wanted to say was that Harry is a dick who believes he has had a shit life when most of us have had it worse. Yet no one listens to our woes and see it as normal. When Harry tells us of normal things; in his head it is abuse. Really Harry you got 2 sausages and William got 3. You had a small bed. Your brother didn’t want to know you at school. These are all normal things. Why is this a revelation?? My point is this. Growing up with no money didn’t make me a twat. Harry, having everything became a twat

No patronising inferred.

That was meant for babsanderson.
no way do I want to patronise. Sorry if offended you

Unfortunately, most people do not understand the difference between normal family crap and emotional abuse/neglect. There is a huge difference. It is very difficult for adult children who have been emotionally abused to share their story because it is often met with this type of derision.

I have seen it many time that adult children who estranged still want a relationship with their family. They find it very difficult to break away and often mourn the family they wished they had.

Am I saying I believe Harry was emotionally abused or neglected? No. I have never talked to Harry and I wouldn't assume to know if he thinks he was abused.

But I can say that I, and apparently several other adult children who have been emotionally abused on MN (based on previous posts on this thread) , see a parallel to how Harry grew up and how they grew up. Some people are finding they feel empathy for what Harry has described, others are not.

I hope that you are able to find a way to turn off the Harry/Meghan train of thought and find peace.

He's sharing his life and making a living for himself and his family.

Consider why that's an issue for you but not those sitting on the largest expanse of land, all their expenses paid, lots of precious jewelry belonging to impoverished nations. Yet they've brain washed you to think they're working hard cutting ribbons, dressing up, taking photos and selling stories for favourable press.

How old are we when we recongnise this then? rough ballpark doesn't need to be exact then I can put it in my diary to see if I agree (clue , I won't).

@Bloodthickerthanwater How old are you out of interest?

Charles wrote a book that wasn't too kind about his childhood....but well suppose your okay with Charles doing it

*He's sharing his life and making a living for himself and his family.

Consider why that's an issue for you but not those sitting on the largest expanse of land, all their expenses paid, lots of precious jewelry belonging to impoverished nations. Yet they've brain washed you to think they're working hard cutting ribbons, dressing up, taking photos and selling stories for favourable press.*

It is possible to disapprove of both, you know. Disapproval of Harry's actions doesn't necessarily mean you've been brainwashed into adoring the royal family.

OP I am 60 and have experienced a lot of life. You are right that all families have issues. Mine certainly have, and I am lucky enough that we have so far been able to resolve them together. I recognise I am lucky and I am not smug enough to think that my family are intact because of some morally superior ability to resolve things. I am simply fortunate, for the time being.

But in my life I have known many people who have been landed with abusive and toxic relatives. Some people are are not capable of decent relationships. No amount of compromise works. In such situations the only reasonable thing to do is to speak out and/or sever contact.

I wonder if you have actually read Harry’s book, all of it. Your opinions seem to be based on headlines relating to the more extreme anecdotes in the book. Harry’s main issue is with the press and the strange and unnatural life the RF are forced to lead. He says a lot of loving and affectionate things about his family. However If you read the book you will find that there were many, many incidences where people within the palace released very critical and often untrue stories about him. How would you handle that if it happened for most of your life? Would you really put up with it?

Harry's main problem is jealousy. His spoutings about how badly he was treated are laughable. The Royal machine did a great job in hiding how awful Harry really is. He's now exposed this through his own words.

Seriously stop with the trope about who the crown jewels really belong too if you can resolve the issue of that diamond which has four claims to it without causing a war or a conflict carry on better heads than yours have tried and failed

Kate4Queen 😁

However If you read the book you will find that there were many, many incidences where people within the palace released very critical and often untrue stories about him. How would you handle that if it happened for most of your life? Would you really put up with it?

I haven't read the book so you know more than me. Who released these stories and what were the actual bad stories? Because they didnt dent his popularity at all so it seems like it was a failed strategy.
Was he happy when they lied on his behalf and denied stories that were actually true? Or was he condemning of those as well?