‘Whatever love means’ - Princess Diana’s face 😔

[justanotherneighinparadise]

Gosh this article really got me last night. That poor woman.

www.google.co.uk/amp/s/www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-9352699/amp/Dianas-reaction-Charles-infamous-love-means-comment-seen-unearthed-footage.html

When she was 7 her mother left and said she'd come back. Diana used to wait on the doorstep for her but she never came. All the money in the world doesn't make up for that. She was quite damaged with eating disorders and self harm as an adult.

Bellsbuss - She wasn't a 19 year old child, there is no such thing. She was a 19 year old adult.

He said "whatever 'in love' means" and that's a lot different from what many people think.

It was a wanky thing to say to the press, right at the moment they were asking about this happy event. Even if you want to see some nuance to his words, the timing was really shitty. Can you imagine saying vows to your husband and as you do he says “whatever, love, honour and respect means” He knew what he was doing and it was very disrespectful.

Diana grew up in privilege unimaginable to most of us

Of course, because people who happen to be born in to wealth can’t ever have any problems, can they.

No one twisted her arm and forced her to marry Charles

Plenty of women come on here having married men they knew were abusive, controlling, unfaithful etc. Can you imagine the response if people said “nobody forced you to marry him” and suggested they just had to be happy with their lot.

She was 19. In love probably for the first time. Maybe she thought she could change him. Maybe she thought she’d still be able to keep some of herself. Maybe she thought this much older, wiser man would keep her safe and be her protector.

I was a pretty street smart, mature 19 year old. But I also still had a very idealistic view of the world and was certain things like sexism and discrimination would never be a problem for me, because I was smart enough to deal with it. Don’t most 19 year olds think they know it all? Thankfully I was able to learn from my mistakes in the privacy of my own life. I’d hate to think how it would have been if the world had then tracked my every move to put those mistakes on display. To discover that I had absolutely no support to get through them, from the people who were supposed to care.

She was not responsible for everything that went wrong, and actually the attitude of “you made your bed just lie in it” is exactly what led to her mental health problems as she grew up.

I think that Charles was also under pressure from his mother and grandmother to marry. I don't think that they liked the idea of him being an aging man with a string of dalliances behind him.

The weird thing here is that people I worked with at the time, thought they were ill-suited and said so, AT THE TIME.
I have never forgotten it, because they thought the age difference was too great and we commented on it, but finally we agreed that it was not the age range specifically, as long as you have SOME things in common.
Of course, later I realised that P Charles and Diana had nothing in common. He liked the country, horses and Opera. She liked the Town, hated horses, and preferred ballet.
These are of course, only superficial things, but PC friends were those like the elderly Laurens Van Der Post, whereas she was part of the Sloane Set.
Truthfully, I also had a conversation with work colleagues about the over use of the words 'In Love', on a completely different topic, so this itself did not seem to remarkable to me.
Of course, the truth is, PC was pressured by others, the press, family etc to marry, as was Diana by her family, who liked being connected to the Royal Family. Diana later admitted they had only met about a dozen times. She may have been in love with the idea of marrying a prince, but clearly did not love Charles, the man, just as he did not really love her.

I think she was very young. And from what I understand, she didn't have the most stable family background, which could have added to the immaturity about relationships. She obviously suffered emotionally. Knowing now that Charles was having an affair, I can't help but think he wanted someone who would be easy to keep to one side whilst he carried on, and a young shy girl would fit the bill for that as well as what the royals wanted.

I don't think she could have fully comprehended what she was getting into. Although the tabloids had been mad on the royals beforehand, it wasn't on the same scale as with Diana and going into the era of 24/7 news cycles and cable tv would have impacted things further.

I don't think she ever had good mental health. I remember there being speculation that she had Emotionally Unstable Personality - Borderline Type as a result of early childhood emotional neglect. She was never going to cope with the slightest degree of ambivalence in a relationship and would be hugely sensitive to real or perceived abandonment. What she did for the gay community - shaking hands with AIDS does mark her as a truly remarkable person. Homophobia and AIDS phobia was disgustingly rife in the early 80s, unless you were there it's impossible to overstate how compassionate and gloriously subversive this gesture was. I also suspect it met a need in her to be loved.

She was 19. In love probably for the first time

I don't think she was any more in love than he was.

I have sympathy for her, but no more than I have for Charles in that situation too.

Oh come on, they both came from fairly dysfunctional families in various ways, but the onus is on the 32 year old who has much more power to do the right thing, rather than a naive 19 year old who was very much in a junior position to him.

Agree @Wehaveanunderstanding and I think once the whole circus had got underway it would’ve been unthinkable for her to call the wedding off, especially without a strong parental figure to back her up

Diana grew up in privilege unimaginable to most of us, and married into yet more privilege

No amount of money buys happiness. She had an unhappy childhood. Her parents divorced when she was seven. Her father won custody so she wasn’t allowed to live with her mother, she hated her stepmother who allegedly bullied her. She was only 19, and not at all worldly-wise when she married Prince Charles.

She didn't exactly have a good role model in terms of seeing what a successful marriage and happy family life looked like.

I was no monarchist back then but there was no internet so I saw the coverage live and I remember being shocked by it at the time. He was being honest I suppose.

Normal plebs like me has not heard of Camilla back then.

had

No amount of money buys happiness.

I agree it can't buy happiness, but it can alleviate misery. Diana wasn't stuck in a council B&B after the divorce counting the pennies for the next meal and wearing her coat indoors because the heating was too expensive. Of course Diana would have been upset by her parents' divorce - aren't most people - but surely you are not saying that no one whose parents divorce can go on to have a happy marriage?

I agree it can't buy happiness, but it can alleviate misery

Being poor sucks, but if you are unhappy and have mental health issues it doesn't change whether you are rich or poor. She felt caged. It was a gilded cage, but it was a cage nevertheless.

Inspite of her privileged upbringing , she grew up in a dysfunctional family, and sorry to say married into one .
In times gone by , many royal married the people they were expected to , and having sex was just to procure the heir and spare.
They went went onto have there fun and kicks with others outside of said marriages, the wives knew it went on and looked the other way ( also having plenty of their own fun with others )
Diana sneaked plenty of men into Kensington Palace, some of which were married. It is also said she stalked a few as well.
Her death was a terrible tragedy ,obviously for herself as she never got to have peace in her own life , and of course for her two young sons.

@SoupDragon

She was 19. In love probably for the first time

I don't think she was any more in love than he was.

indeed, look at her quick shifty response "of course" and looking away awkwardly.

she wasn't in love.

@LApprentiSorcier

I'm not denying they are a dysfunctional family but not in the romanticised way you seem to think. Diana was not an ill-used heroine. She was a vain, ambitious woman who married for position, not love, and it came back to bite her.

I disagree. I don’t think she was vain or ambitious. I think she was very young, damaged and insecure. She had no idea about relationships. She had never had a boyfriend and never had sex. She looked up to him to protect her and thought he loved her. However it became apparent that he didn’t love her and wouldn’t protect her. She was naive. It was so very sad.

I think her "of course" reply is an overreaction. She didn't love him and knew he didn't love her, imo.

I think she thought she loved him. I think she thought he loved her when they got engaged.

@GoLightlyontheEarth

I think she thought she loved him. I think she thought he loved her when they got engaged.

I genuinely don't. I think she probably hoped that they would grow to love each other but I don't think either of them were "in love" then.

No one will ever know the truth though.

So, what else OP? There’s a history of the Royal males marrying the wrong woman....

If she were plain and hadn't died, nobody would be talking about her or her marriage. That is what is odd. People endlessly speculating and talking about her without any knowledge at all, just wild supposition.