Cat missing five days. I messed up, what else can I do?

[miliop]

Both my parents died recently and I have taken in their cat and elderly dog. It has been insanely stressful.

The cat has now been missing for five days and I don't know what else I can do.

I have

• updated his microchip and let them know he is missing
• sent photos and description to all local vets
• put a message on my street WhatsApp and the next street's
• knocked on doors on my street to ask people to check sheds etc
• put his blankets, litter tray and hoover contents outside
• called for him and dusk and dawn, with his food
• called for him at same times in the field above the house and the allotments nearby

For more context, he has always been very much my cat. He knows my voice, he is used to cuddling in with me, he would sleep in the bed with me whenever I went to their house, and has done every night for the last five weeks. I am heartbroken and worried sick.

I am beating myself up because I took him to my house two weeks ago after my second parent died (I had to come home) and I let him out too early. He was fine for the first few days, pottering around the garden and coming in. Then one evening he seemed very quiet and withdrawn and he went out and didn't come back. I feel terrible and stupid about this and wasn't thinking straight. I know I fucked up. I thought he would be ok because he's very used to me and my house/garden is very similar to my parents'.

I'm even worried he could have tried to return to their house, which is 40 miles away. I've had the neighbours put out food and water just in case, and I will go there in a few days. Possibly set a camera up too. I don't know if that's a ridiculous idea that he would try to get home but he only ever knew that house.

Thankfully he is very streetwise, he can and does feed himself. My dad would always say he was very territorial and I'm worried this means he'd simply go back to the place he knows.

I'm wondering what else can I do, and can anyone give me hope?

I took my MIL's cat in after she died. We already had a dog and 2 cars. We kept her in a separate room to begin with (our bedroom). Unfortunately i had to get up one night to see to one of the kids and she escaped. She had been gone 6 weeks in mid winter. In Feb half term me and all the kids were playing on our bed and one said 'Poppy is under the bed'...and she was. Skin and bone and covered in black bits. Took her to the vets. He said she was malnourished but apart that healthy. We fed her up, she became quite fat for a while but stayed with us for another 7 years! She'd only been with us a few days and didn't know us. Dont give up hope!

DD moved house and kept cat in. But after a week he escaped when they were letting the dog out. And it was around bonfire night. He was away for about 10 days and they really thought they would never see him again when he turned up about 3 one morning and they heard him mewing. So don’t give up hope!

https://www.animalsearchuk.co.uk

Go on & register them missing on here - it’s free.
also look under ‘found’ you may find them .

I wish you luck & you haven’t messed up - you’ve done your best at an awful time for you.

be a little kinder to yourself.

@miliop

Massive condolences for your recent losses!! How awful, and now the cat on top..,

Keeping everything crossed for you that he’s returned safely, somehow or other!!

I second the paper posters with a color photo of your cat, a description of any unusual features etc and your tlf, around both yours and parents neighbourhood.
I often see them around and take a photo of it just in case. (You can use the clear punched pockets sleeves for school to waterproof)
A year ago while walking my dog I saw a cat in the basement of a building that looked familiar, checked my phone and it was indeed somebody's cat that had got lost many days before, I got in touch straight away and they got him. He was fine just hungry.
Persevere, Good luck!

@Mackerelfillets @Mathleticsathlete amazing, thank you for sharing. Both your stories give me hope.

@pausingforbreath thank you for the link, hadn't seen that site.

Posted more flyers last night, will do posters today. Staying positive (mostly).

This sounds bonkers but there are cat calling noises on YouTube for lost cats. When our kitten escaped I walked up and down the street playing them and she emerged from behind a tree in our front garden. I don't know how it worked but it did. Good luck!!!!

Another poster mentioned this. I'll try this evening, thank you.

When we had to rehome our childhood cat due to DB’s asthma he still came back to see us (only 5 min walk away).

When I had my old cat Felix, he went missing for a week, I think he was locked in a neighbours shed or garage by mistake as he was curious and it being summer they’d gone away. I leafleted and knocked on all neighbouring houses and he returned (I called him too).

A cat went missing in June around here. We were all out looking. It was found alive in mid August a few miles away by the leaflets/facebook groups I was so happy! There is still hope

Any news, @miliop ?
Ours was gone two months.. we'd given up hope.
I heard from someone responding to one of our many online posts, from about 3/4 miles away, & it was her!
She ran in the house & went straight upstairs to bed as though nothing had happened. :-)
Wishing you luck.

Sadly nothing yet. But thank you for telling me this! I am so pleased you got your cat back and it really helps to hear that it is quite possible, after days, weeks or even months, that he can come back to me.

Edited to add: that really illustrates how they don't see time as we do.

Did you find your cat? I’m hoping so 🥺 xx

Still nothing. Done posters, leaflets, FB, Nextdoor etc and I've not even had anyone tell me they think they've seen him.

I've put a camera up at my parents' house and now I think it's likely he has tried to go back there. The journey is mostly rural but there is a dual carriageway to cross. I have no idea how long it would take him, if that's what he has done.

I mentioned the elderly dog in my original post... driving me insane with stress. Age-related difficulties, neuroses etc.

So much stress and grief, I think I'm going a bit numb. I haven't gone into detail about my parents' deaths but one was truly horrific.

I hope I'll see my baby again but it's fucking hard to be positive sometimes.

My cat ran away after two weeks of moving. He tried to reach the old house and was very close by a mile and half! A lady took him in and took him to be checked at the vets. We got him back after a year!

How far away was it?

So pleased you got him back.

Please keep us informed. I’m praying you find him. Im so sorry for the loss of your parents xx

He stopped 2.5 miles away and was kept as an indoor cat for a few months before the vet visit. She must have treated him well as she cried when the vet said he is owned and would have to call me. I literally lived down the road! I did explain that I was grateful to her. Also if he ran away again and landed on her doorstep again then she could keep him.

I do think if the lady had fed him and let him out, he would have made it back to the old house as it was so close and a simple straight route from there. I had the new buyers look out for him. When he came back he never ran away again! I sincerely hope you get yours back 🌺

I'm sure she meant well but god you can't just do that...

Mine would go completely berserk if made to be an indoor cat.

Thank you for your kind words.

People who do this irritate me, the number of times you see people online saying ‘I’ve got a cat’ just because it came in their house…a cat walked into my mums house last week when she had a decorator in and the door was open, it must happen all the time to people so why would they think they can keep it.

If a cat keeps coming back and looks like a stray/lost it should be taken straight to the vet for a chip scan. Otherwise if it is just a cat wandering it should be left, it will go home. I’m glad you managed to get yours back…I hope OP does too.

I’m so sorry OP, how very stressful and sad. A bit of a nuclear option but there are specialist pet hunters who go out with trained sniffer dogs to try and track them down. A friend got her missing cat back this way. The guy she used is London based and I can’t remember his name but you might find someone similar through google?

I've got 2 cats and this is my worst nightmare, I'm so sorry you're having such a shit time, having to deal with everything on top of this is just rubbish.

I've got everything crossed for you all. X Please let us know when he turns up.

I’m so upset for you. What a horrible thing to happen. I’m so sorry, I was so hoping I’d read he had turned up. Sending hugs OP

People have been so, so kind. Absolutely everyone. When I've been putting up posters, I've had joggers and telecoms engineers stop to ask, really concerned and promising to look out. Plus everyone here. It does help.

I will definitely update, even if it takes weeks or months.

To waterproof the posters you pop them into a Polly pocket or laminate them.