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Cat behaving oddly with another cat

12 replies

Friday1234 · 26/07/2026 12:04

We have a young male (neutered) cat who likes being outside a lot. He’s what I think is appropriately territorial in our garden. He likes to be on top of the shed keeping an eye out and staring at other cats, puffing up if they get too close and hissing etc. He’s absent from the garden a lot too but no idea where he goes.
Recently another cat (who looks a lot like him weirdly) has been taking up his spot on the shed and our cat doesn’t seem at all bothered. He’s just slinking around - no puffing and happy to have his back to him. It’s very out of character, which is concerning me a bit. But what’s also very annoying is that this other cat keeps coming in our house, eating our cats food, heading upstairs etc. I’m worried that this isn’t a great situation for our cat. Plus cat food is expensive. We don’t have a cat flap - we have the back doors open because of the weather. I’m reluctant to get a cat flap and keep the doors closed because I like fresh air and we have no obvious place for a cat flap so would have get one installed in the wall. I could probably suck up the cost of that but not straight away.
I guess I’m asking if there is a way I haven’t thought of to keep this cat away? (Currently using a water pistol but I’m not on look out 24/7).
Is another cat coming in likely to be stressful for my cat?
And, why is he behaving differently with this cat?

OP posts:
WeAreNotOk · 26/07/2026 22:32

Maybe it's his boyfriend? Or it's more dominant than him and he's afraid to tackle it. Is your cat actually stressed or just nonchalant? How do they react when in the house together? I guess you could try and trace the owners. Put something on Facebook etc. Not sure what you can do about it though, cat's will be cat's and go where they want, lol.

teaandtoastwithmarmite · 27/07/2026 07:17

We had a cat who kept coming in. Unneutered male and attacking my 2 year old girl cat. He died but now his spot has been taken by my neighbours cat who’s decided he fancies my 12 year old girl cat and keeps coming in and she hisses at him. There’s not a lot you can do.

pinkandwhiteroses · 27/07/2026 07:43

It sounds like they’re friends? Unless your cat is showing signs of stress or fear then it sounds perfectly normal to me - many cats are quite sociable and happy to hang out with others.

MargotLovesTom · 27/07/2026 07:50

When your cat is absent from the garden he might well be wandering around someone else's house, much the same as you have with the strange cat 🤷‍♀️.

As you know, the only way to control the situation is to have a cat flap or close the doors, and if you don't want to do that then you accept you're going to have a visitor. Your cat seems to be okay with this one, so probably best to be thankful for that...better than having a determined interloper who gets in a scrap with yours on a daily basis.

Friday1234 · 27/07/2026 12:30

WeAreNotOk · 26/07/2026 22:32

Maybe it's his boyfriend? Or it's more dominant than him and he's afraid to tackle it. Is your cat actually stressed or just nonchalant? How do they react when in the house together? I guess you could try and trace the owners. Put something on Facebook etc. Not sure what you can do about it though, cat's will be cat's and go where they want, lol.

Nonchalant I would say? Which is still out of character as he has seen off the local top cat a few times and isn’t scared of a fight. You’re right - cats will do their thing!

OP posts:
Friday1234 · 27/07/2026 12:32

MargotLovesTom · 27/07/2026 07:50

When your cat is absent from the garden he might well be wandering around someone else's house, much the same as you have with the strange cat 🤷‍♀️.

As you know, the only way to control the situation is to have a cat flap or close the doors, and if you don't want to do that then you accept you're going to have a visitor. Your cat seems to be okay with this one, so probably best to be thankful for that...better than having a determined interloper who gets in a scrap with yours on a daily basis.

Love your username!
You are right - it could be worse! I do wonder where our cat goes all day but am too tight for a tracker…..

OP posts:
Friday1234 · 27/07/2026 12:34

pinkandwhiteroses · 27/07/2026 07:43

It sounds like they’re friends? Unless your cat is showing signs of stress or fear then it sounds perfectly normal to me - many cats are quite sociable and happy to hang out with others.

I didn’t realise cats could have friends tbh as my last cat was an indoor cat and this one is generally quite angsty with other cats. But sounds like I’m over thinking and if he isn’t bothered maybe I don’t need to be

OP posts:
Friday1234 · 27/07/2026 12:35

teaandtoastwithmarmite · 27/07/2026 07:17

We had a cat who kept coming in. Unneutered male and attacking my 2 year old girl cat. He died but now his spot has been taken by my neighbours cat who’s decided he fancies my 12 year old girl cat and keeps coming in and she hisses at him. There’s not a lot you can do.

maybe I just need to be grateful they aren’t fighting!

OP posts:
pinkandwhiteroses · 27/07/2026 12:35

Friday1234 · 27/07/2026 12:34

I didn’t realise cats could have friends tbh as my last cat was an indoor cat and this one is generally quite angsty with other cats. But sounds like I’m over thinking and if he isn’t bothered maybe I don’t need to be

They definitely can. My 6yo actively seeks out other cats when he's out and while he does fight sometimes, he definitely enjoys the company of others. We also have a 13yo and they often curl up together, groom each other etc.

The idea that cats are solitary animals who don't want company is generally not true.

Noshadelamp · 27/07/2026 13:39

It sounds like they’re friends?
@pinkandwhiteroses
Not a cat owner and don't know why I clicked on this thread but this sentence is worded so perfectly, they're friends 😭

pinkandwhiteroses · 27/07/2026 13:46

Noshadelamp · 27/07/2026 13:39

It sounds like they’re friends?
@pinkandwhiteroses
Not a cat owner and don't know why I clicked on this thread but this sentence is worded so perfectly, they're friends 😭

Haha thank you! Our own cat has a little tabby and white friend down the road, I see them playing in the bushes together 😍

Chocolatecustardcreamsrule · 27/07/2026 13:51

I agree with the others- they are friends. My tuxedo has a friend that looks just like him (we call him dupe). He’s tried to come through our cat flap a few times but ours is one that recognizes our cats microchip. The neighbour has said thought that ours has also gone home with dupe and has been sat happily on her windowsill.

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