Siamesey breed driving us mad

[Shamesame]

Help me not have to give my cat away.

We have two cats, sisters from the same litter who are a Siamese-type breed. One of them has always been loud and in your face but also loving and funny and cuddly and the best.

Ever since the arrival of our baby nearly 2 years ago she’s been super stressed - when awake she walks around the house yowling and never settles. If the toddler cries she gets involved and then gets more stressed. She attacks the other cat etc.

It’s getting to the point of my husband saying her or me because he hates her as it’s so stressful having her around. She also has plenty of safe places etc she could escape to.

I’ve booked a vet appointment but any tips or things to try gratefully received.

Correlation does not mean causation - have you taken her to a vet? She could be ill.

You only had to read ONE POST to see the situation re seeing a vet 🙄

Well it’s the obvious first step isn’t it?

Yes, but she's already said she has booked an appointment.

We had a similar situation also with a female cat. We’d had her from a kitten and she’d always been a happy little thing, then when child arrived she was miserable, stressed, always on meds for stress related illnesses (including feliway etc). In the end I felt she was telling us she was not happy with the setup and rehomed her with a child free household. They give me updates periodically and she’s been a very happy girl since, all her stress related complaints cleared up immediately. Sometimes the hard choice is the kind one.

Not a Siamese but we adopted our last cat in similar circumstances. Her family had had her from a kitten, loved her dearly, but she was very stressed when they went on to have a toddler (she hated loud noises) and when they had a second baby on the way they made the difficult decision to rehome her.

She had to be pts in 2024 aged ten, but she had seven years living like an absolute queen with us. I kept in touch with her former “mum” and she was as heartbroken as we were when she was diagnosed with cancer. I’m so grateful they made that hard choice and we had our lovely girl - and that she had a happy life with us where her only noisy enemies were the hoover and occasional smoke alarm.

Yes vet already seen and a follow up booked as mentioned. She was given some anti anxiety medication which doesn’t seem to have helped hence booking another appointment.

It breaks my heart that giving her up might be my only option, she got me through multiple miscarriages and I just want us all to be happy.

I have 2 oriental breed cats. They're not like other cats and are much more social and highly strung.
If your vet gives her a clean bill of health, what you are seeing is her communicating with you.
She's not happy and is stressed by the baby.
One of my cats particularly hates changes in the house - dislikes Christmas especially. She stress grooms until she gets bald patches on her legs. Christmas over - no more people, things go back to normal. Fur grows back.
I tolerate putting her through this because it's once a year for a few days. Would I be a good owner to make an obviously stressed animal live in an environment that makes her unhappy all the time? Even though I love her to bits.

She might be protecting your baby but it's not happy for anyone so I would rehome her if the vet says there's no health issue, is the other cat happy and settled.

Have you heard of the cat hormone diffusers which release mother cat hormones to chill cats out? I just wondered if that might help as it’s a bit like introducing a new cat?

our vet recommended this when we introduced a new cat to an existing one. We didn’t need it in the end so I can’t recommend it but he said it could help.

https://www.feliway.co.uk/products/feliway-friends-diffuser

We have a siamese ( did have 2) and they are very different to normal cats , ours gets very stressed if there is more than 5 people in a room so at Christmas she generally just lives upstairs . If you’ve tried all the feliway type things I think rehoming may be best for the cat

So she did. Apologies, I missed that bit