Feeling sad about childhood cat

[youplonkerrodney]

My childhood cat was loved, but not really cared for the way I care for my cat today.
It’s on my parents rather than me as a child, but I still feel sadness and regret looking back.

To give the positives first, she lived in a clean and comfy house with plenty of places to nap and a large safe garden to explore.
She was best friends with our dog and they used to lie in the sun together.
She had plenty of affection including strokes and cuddles (even if sometimes unwanted).
She was fed regularly and treated well - we were never cruel to her.

But -
She was put outside every night.
Her bed was in the outhouse, which would have been cold in winter.
She was fed regularly but there was no single person who was in charge of it at a specific time, and she tended to ‘ask’ for food by meowing at whoever was in the kitchen, so looking back we might have forgotten some meals if we weren't there or she didn't ask.
She didn’t get regular vet checkups. she lived with painful teeth for a long time before we eventually took her and they were removed.
I can remember as a child putting tcp on her scratched ear which I now know would have been toxic to her.

She was such a dear cat, and even though I loved her and did the best I could at the time as a child, I look back and wish I had known better, and that my parents had been more tuned into her care.

Don’t really have a question, except do others experience this when looking back at pets from 30, 40 years ago?

Kindly @youplonkerrodney I don't think previous generations fussed over cats like they do now. It seems wrong now but then was more usual.

My grandparents had feral cats in the stables. When there were kittens, the grooms knew what to do. Unthinkable now.

Their horses, working dogs, sheep, hens and pigs were very well cared.

I feel bad for my childhood cats too. Didn't see a vet or get preventative flea/wormer. Not neutered/spayed so ended up pregnant with litters of kittens. One gave birth under my bed. Probably interbred too. Totally different to the way my 2 cats live

Same, I feel guilt about my childhood rabbits, their conditions were nowhere near good enough. The cats not so much as they had good lives but died really young as we were on a main road. I spoil my cat now as a result (which isn’t a problem) but am a bit panicky and over protective.

I also feel guilty about my childhood rabbits which lived in hutches that weren’t really big enough by today’s standards. They did get a lot of outside time and were well fed/handled, always clean cosy enclosure etc but it must have been a rubbish life. I was just a little kid, and it was the 80s, I can’t go back in time. Our cat is treated like an absolute king (his predecessor like a queen) and I hope that absolves me slightly.

Well my childhood cat never went to the vet apart from once when he was bitten by a rat. He caught rats daily dead and alive. I’m sure there was no cat flap door either. He was fed. One time though my mum got so annoyed with his miaowing so she chucked him out of the kitchen window.

Same. My childhood cats and dogs were badly treated when I look back. No deliberate cruelty but they were neglected.

It hurts my heart to be honest.

I had a guinea pig as a teenager that only got the bare minimum. I feel such terrible guilt about it now.

Our cats were well looked after but definitely not pandered to in the way they are now. However once my sister and I grew up, the cats became my parents focus, so naturally were completely spoiled.

I know what you mean. I was explaining to the DC this week that it was quite normal in lots of households for dogs to sleep in kennels outdoors back in the day (not that we ever did that specifically. It was just different and I'd try not to feel bad about it - so much has changed in that time too. Parenting is the same! When I think of the things my parents did/didn't do in the 80s they seem absolutely shocking but they were just going by the standards of the time.

I completely get you, @youplonkerrodney . I could say the same about multiple pets of ours. Vets were an expensive luxury, only visited if a wound went septic... no worming, tick or flea treatments, vaccinations... nothing. We had a dog and cat lived outside, but in a very warm country so it was not cold... the dog was supposedly a guard dog but not a very good one as she made friends with all and sundry. She was never spayed and unsurprisingly had puppies. They were all given away to anyone who showed the slightest passing interest, because we didn't have the room for them. Our "starter" rescue labrador was overfed by our clueless mum, and became very obese and basically disabled. I was five and didn't know any better. A simple visit to the vet would have set us all straight about feeding and multiple other welfare measures, but that never happened.

I grew up on a farm, and believe me, your cat was a lot better looked after than any of our pets by the sounds of things! Don't feel any guilt.

Don't mean this as a derail, but, our un-neutered dog was let out in the morning to roam where he wanted, as was everyone else's dog, though bitches were kept indoors to reduce litters.
But, tomcats were never neutered either and free to roam: and, as you say, chucked out at night so they could hunt.
Vet visits were for emergency reasons only.
The past is a different country, indeed.

Kittens were acquired free when someone's cat had a litter usually at 6 weeks .
Our guinea pigs my daughter had were better researched than the ones I had as a child and I am convinced they had a better life but my piggies years ago were happy and mostly long lived

@70isaLimitNotaTarget my neighbour is French and grew up rurally - he was surprised the vet here strongly advised he had his cats neutered. (He now has, but wanted the female to have a litter first which she did.) When he grew up (he’s 40) cats just catted about, and his dad “took care of it” if there were too many kittens. I know he thinks I’m a sap about our cat, but I was horrified!