Cat on edge all the time long after adoption

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I adopted two 5 month old kittens in October - siblings. They seem to have settled pretty well but the female has always been more skittish than the male - took a few days to come our from behind the sofa while he was pretty settled from the off, and it has continued like that.

I'm concerned that she seems so alert all the time and worry that she isn't happy with us. She rarely sleeps, though I assume she must do at night and/or during the day when we are out. She quite often leaves her wet food and prefers biscuits. She does sit on my lap for a bit most evenings and first thing in the mornings. She is noticeably easier to pick up than she was (used to be nearly impossible) and sometimes has a cwtch with ds now as well. She has no interest whatsoever in going out, even now it's warm and with the patio door open all day. She does have the funniest zoomies most days.

I have attached a picture of her taken now. She just seems so on edge all the time. Any thoughts?

She sits on your lap, so she can't be that unhappy. She knows she can come to you for fuss. Also she's with her sibling and that's a good setup for a kitten. Just sounds like a personality thing to me.

With our newest cat, she was skittish for a good while but will come for lap time. She now sleeps a lot more, but this is a year in. She still does not like being picked up at all. Just got to let them go at their pace.

Just give it time. My cat was skittish for ages after adoption.

I have an anxious cat that used to be a stray. She cuddles us, she plays with toys, but is always alert. We now use Feliway and the change in her is massive as she is so relaxed, we can now tell when the plug in has run out because she returns to being more alert, I think she will always be anxious due to her being injured and starving as a youngster, I probably would be too! We have the main one in the hallway so every time we walk past it we are swishing the Feliway around.

Interesting that Feliway works, I will try it. We have one who we’ve had for years who is hyper alert, runs away if I make an unexpected move. Her brother is the most laid back cat ever! I think it’s just the way some cats are wired. At time she can be super needy, wanting lots of attention, think head butting your hand if you stop stroking, but was many, many months before she started sitting on laps. Even now she prefers next to rather than on me.

I think all cats are different, but she sounds like she’s doing fine. Our boy took about five months to really truly settle - he was one when we adopted him and had been a stray kitten. He was always friendly and polite, enjoyed being petted, but it definitely took him a while to be “our cat” and totally at home. It was like he always had one eye open, even when he was asleep. After we started letting him out he went mad exploring, then didn’t bother at all for ages. It was like he needed to know he’d get back in before he was really comfortable being out. I was scrolling back WA chats with DP looking for something a few weeks ago and found a conversation from August that year - we adopted him in April - and I had said something about the fact he was sleeping in our bed and properly asleep even when I was pottering around, and it felt like a total breakthrough. He’d now sleep through anything bar the hoover or smoke alarm, and is a lovely, funny, cuddly boy who is king of the shed roof, surveying his neighbourhood.

Our previous girl settled pretty much straight away. She had three days of sleeping behind the living room curtains, then it was just like she’d always been here!

The sad thing is we just don’t know what they had to deal with in their first few months

the fact she sits with you is huge, she’s obviously happy and settled with you

i’m not allowed to wear anything green or have anything green in the house because it upsets my cat. They are strange we just accept it

We adopted our 1 year old cat in 2020, it was a good 12 months before he would sit on our laps and then he was incredibly easily startled. He was still nervous of strangers in our home a couple of years ago and would run and hide from them. We’ve had him 6 years now and only in the past 2 years has he become comfortable and seeking affection from strangers in the house. You really need to give it a lot more time.