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The litter tray

Join our community of cat lovers on the Mumsnet Cat forum for kitten advice and help with cat behaviour.

Bored or stressed?

10 replies

FlossTea · 20/02/2026 11:09

Looking for advice on how to both support my cat and ideally also improve her behaviour! She's a 2.5 year old ginger and white female and seems to have had quite a noticeable behaviour change recently. She's always been quite lively (think she definitely has "single kitten syndrome") but lately there have been several changes in her behaviour - overgrooming (she currently has quite a bald tummy), and a massive increase in "disruptive" behaviours - jumping up on counters/tables she never did before, sitting directly in front of the telly, getting very involved in whatever we're doing.... Unfortunately this is very triggering for my neurodivergent 7 year old as she has a tendency to get right up in his space (e.g. sit right next to the computer when he's playing minecraft and swipe at his hands/ the screen).

I've taken her to the vets who thought the baldness is stress related and she's on gabapentin for it but I'm not sure it's having much effect. She had a VERY stressful year last year (moved house, long ear infection needing a lot of investigation and treatment, getting lost for 5 days), which all seem to have made her less confident with strangers than she used to be but things have been much more settled for the last 6 months so it's odd that this behaviour has started now. I'm not sure it's stress as it seems more like seeking interaction than withdrawing- she reminds me of a toddler that's trying to socialise but hasn't learned how to do it appropriately!

I've bought several toys but she's not interested, and have been making an effort to play with her with a bit of string (the only thing she'll go for) throughout the day but she's still not herself. She has unrestricted access to outside.

Has anyone else experienced this/ got any tips? Does Feliway work??

OP posts:
Judystilldreamsofhorses · 20/02/2026 12:20

Not the over-grooming, but we have a ginger boy and the rest of it is absolutely par for the course with him and always has been! He does love toys though and will go and get them for you to play with with him, or tap at the drawer where I keep stringy wand ones (safe in case he strangles himself) to tell you he wants those. I find a 20 minute burst of chasing Barry Bat round the kitchen tires him out and I will then pick him up and plonk him on the heated throw where he will settle down if he's being a pest.

We used to use Feliway around fireworks times with our last cat but I don't think it made any difference to her - she was really terrified and it was heartbreaking. I know other people have had good results with it though so it's maybe worth a shot.

FlossTea · 21/02/2026 18:01

Thank you, i think it's more that it's a noticeable and marked behaviour change, combined with the overgrooming, that worries me. Tonight she has gone for my child unprovoked (was definitely unprovoked, he was just sitting watching TV and i saw her do it), I'm really not sure what to do! Trying extra hard to play with her and get my son to play with her/give her treats so they can have some more positive interactions. I think I'll try talking to the vet again.

Ps - great username :)

OP posts:
70isaLimitNotaTarget · 21/02/2026 19:52

Our male is very stress-ey , everything unsettles him, it's just how he is .
Fireworks Night and New Year are particular triggers for him.
He was pulling out his fur , most likely stress related which we tried to minimise for him. Our Vet suggested removing anything fish from his diet as some cats are allergic . It has helped and a fairly easy change for him.

Overtheatlantic · 21/02/2026 20:57

I would just add that the season is starting to change and animals can tell. My 11 year old cat is extra extra these days. Running, playing, eating like she’s starving, and she lounged on the patio today for about an hour. It was cold, but it wasn’t raining. So yeah, changing seasons plus a young cat might increase the difference in behaviour.

Judystilldreamsofhorses · 21/02/2026 22:54

@FlossTea we’re going to see them play If You’re Feeling Sinister live in June, can’t wait!

Jux · 21/02/2026 22:59

Get her a playmate. Small kitten would work.

FlossTea · 22/02/2026 13:24

Judystilldreamsofhorses · 21/02/2026 22:54

@FlossTea we’re going to see them play If You’re Feeling Sinister live in June, can’t wait!

Oh wow, I saw them do that at the Barbican, probably about 20 years ago now (how am i old enough to say that 😆), it was sooo good!

OP posts:
FlossTea · 22/02/2026 13:27

@Overtheatlantic that is really interesting, I think you might be onto something there! She loves the Summer, spends most of her time in the garden stalking about in the grass and pouncing on bugs, hopefully that will help.

I've also just read that gabapentin can increase aggression so going to stop it for a bit and see if that helps as she's been trying to bite my son again. I feel so bad for them both, they seem to be triggering each other, trying to get my son to be as calm as possible around her but it's not his area of strength 🙄

OP posts:
Pixiedust1234 · 22/02/2026 13:56

FlossTea · 21/02/2026 18:01

Thank you, i think it's more that it's a noticeable and marked behaviour change, combined with the overgrooming, that worries me. Tonight she has gone for my child unprovoked (was definitely unprovoked, he was just sitting watching TV and i saw her do it), I'm really not sure what to do! Trying extra hard to play with her and get my son to play with her/give her treats so they can have some more positive interactions. I think I'll try talking to the vet again.

Ps - great username :)

Edited

Start looking outside. If she went for him unprovoked then I suspect it might be redirected aggression.

Can you get a cheap wildlife camera and see if any other cats or foxes are coming up to the windows especially at night? Another cat might be marking their territory in your cats garden which would stress her out a lot.

Puppylucky · 22/02/2026 14:25

Seconding the change of seasons and weather generally as causing more agitated "busy" behaviour. I've noticed that windy days send my tabby boy nuts. I think he can hear / see more movement in bushes etc and thinks it's little birdies sent to torment him. Unfortunately we live on the coast so windy days aren't exactly a rarity !

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