Am so sorry for your loss. She looks like a beautiful girl, very majestic.
When I lost my first one a few years ago, I remember that feeling of searching for confirmation that you’ll feel ok again. Because it just doesn’t feel possible. The pain of losing them just feels too much.
Right now, you’ll feel as though you won’t get through it. And that’s ok. You need to cry when you need to, don’t bottle it up, crying is a good release for you.
You will get through this, it will just take time. Post on here whenever you want, all cat people will understand. You might feel you can’t share in real life ((for fear of “it’s only a pet” views), but on here you’ll know that people get it.
You really will be ok in the future. I never thought I’d be ok again, and I almost hated people that said time will slowly heal. But they were right. I still miss my boy, he was the most amazing cat ever to have existed, we had such a bond. But I can now sing his praises without breaking down.
Just to reiterate, this place is great for voicing your feelings. Grieving a pet is often not easy in real life, so please do post here when you’re struggling. It’s a difficult loss to navigate in real life and there’s never any judgement here.