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Neighbours cat seems desperate to live here

19 replies

Pearandavocado · 19/10/2025 12:28

The neighbours cat appears desperate to live here instead of his own home. He first appeared two years ago at Christmas and was trying to break in the closed cat flap and howling and scratching on the patio doors really desperate to come in. It transpired his owners were away for 3 weeks which I was told by a cat sitter who was popping in 3 times a week. She also said they have 3 cats, one of which is a bully.

The cat that is trying to live here is a gentle cat who is not aggressive to our cat. We are at home most of the time with the patio doors and windows open from mid Spring to mid Autumn and he just wanders in, finds somewhere to sleep and settles down happily. He sometimes finds a cosy hideaway hoping we won't put him out. We tried putting him out continuously but difficult without closing all doors and windows.

He appeared about 6 weeks ago with an AirTag on so guessing neighbours are wondering where he goes all the time. We have not let him in (easier when weather is colder) but he sits on the doormat instead. He's always around if we go out he greets us on our return. He's outside now meowing in the pouring rain asking to come in. We don't feed him as don't want to confuse him but he clearly wants to live here instead. He looks so sad and guessing doesn't understand why he can't come in. Our household has adults around all the time and an older cat. The neighbours have two young children and 3 cats. The neighbour did say to me that one of the children is a bit overbearing on the cat. What should we do?

OP posts:
OldGothsFadeToGrey · 19/10/2025 12:31

Honestly?

Nothing. It’s not your cat.

Sounds like you are trying to justify why you are about to steal your neighbour’s cat.

Winteriscoming80 · 19/10/2025 12:31

Just ask if you can have the cat?

purpleme12 · 19/10/2025 12:31

Yep agree with @OldGothsFadeToGrey

DisforDarkChocolate · 19/10/2025 12:33

I'd make sure there was shelter and leave it at that. It's bloody annoying they aren't doing more to stop how stressed this cat it. Bully cat and annoying small child sounds a horrible mixture to live with.

FuzzyWolf · 19/10/2025 12:34

He’s only coming round because you’ve let him in before. Just ignore him and eventually he will go. He’s not your cat. He not only has a home but they clearly have a collar on him to make their ownership clear.

If you want him, you can always ask them or say that you are happy for him to come inside if they are. However, untimely he is their cat and it’s their decision.

ConnieCooper · 19/10/2025 12:37

Duplicate post deleted

ConnieCooper · 19/10/2025 12:37

Let him in but let the neighbour know he sleeps in your house. My neighbours cat does this and whilst they love him unconditionally, he’s an only cat so comes to play with mine. I just let them know when he’s shown up and when he’s left.

LauraNorda · 19/10/2025 12:38

We are in a similar situation. The people over the road keep their cat outside almost all the time and just put food on the front doorstep. Obviously, other cats and birds dig in.

She's 17 and all skin and bone. A few months ago we watched her stagger across the road as she was so weak. We started to feed her in our house and within a few weeks, she was positively bouncing along.

We let her sleep at ours at night and let her in during the day when the weather is bad.

We would report the ill-treatment but they would just take her away and put her down as she is so old. We can't really take her in full-time as she is so close to her 'owners'. She is a lovely old lady though and we will continue with what we are doing.

MrsZiggywinkle · 19/10/2025 12:41

Do you like him? Does he get on with your cat? If so, I would let him in.

Cats look for a new home or place to rest if they are unhappy at home. The last couple of rescue cats we’ve had were literally battered by toddlers and spent their time outside or with a neighbour.

Three cat sitter visits a week when away is neglectful to me. I’d be letting him and offering him a new home if I were you!

Iloveeverycat · 19/10/2025 12:43

We have a cat around the corner that comes in our house we don't let him in he comes through the cat flap. We do keep it locked when we are home as we don't want to encourage eating here. I have no problem with him sleeping here at all. The owner knows where he is.

bigboykitty · 19/10/2025 12:45

They went away for 3 weeks and arranged a cat sitter 3 times a week?? Is that a typo? Poor cat.

SingtotheCat · 19/10/2025 12:49

Just let the neighbours know and tell them that you are happy for the cat to come in if they are?

secureyourbook · 19/10/2025 12:52

Do you know specifically who he belongs to? If so I would go and see them and say what you’ve said here - that you aren’t feeding him but he seems to like your house. If another cat is bullying him maybe they’ll be happy for him to have a new home.

Pearandavocado · 19/10/2025 14:14

OldGothsFadeToGrey · 19/10/2025 12:31

Honestly?

Nothing. It’s not your cat.

Sounds like you are trying to justify why you are about to steal your neighbour’s cat.

I'm not trying to steal the cat, if I was I could let him in all the time and feed him and he'd never go. I just don't want to see him sitting outside scratching on the window in the rain, I want him to go home.

OP posts:
Pearandavocado · 19/10/2025 14:18

MrsZiggywinkle · 19/10/2025 12:41

Do you like him? Does he get on with your cat? If so, I would let him in.

Cats look for a new home or place to rest if they are unhappy at home. The last couple of rescue cats we’ve had were literally battered by toddlers and spent their time outside or with a neighbour.

Three cat sitter visits a week when away is neglectful to me. I’d be letting him and offering him a new home if I were you!

We do like him he's a lovely cat and does get on with ours and if he was a stray we wouldn't hesitate in giving him a new home. However, he's not ours but is seemingly unhappy at home.

OP posts:
CatChant · 19/10/2025 14:20

I’d let him in when he wants and let him out when he wants. Shutting him out clearly hasn’t encouraged him to go home, and why should it when he has a bullying cat and a boisterous child to put up with there. All the poor thing wants is some peace and quiet.

CatGuardian · 19/10/2025 14:37

CatChant · 19/10/2025 14:20

I’d let him in when he wants and let him out when he wants. Shutting him out clearly hasn’t encouraged him to go home, and why should it when he has a bullying cat and a boisterous child to put up with there. All the poor thing wants is some peace and quiet.

Yes this. Let the cat come in out of the rain.

TalulahJP · 19/10/2025 14:58

I’d let him in too, wee soul.
mum not sure whether to suggest telling the neighbours or not. I probably would if he thinks he’s staying overnight right enough.

allmycats · 19/10/2025 15:54

Let the poor thing inside, out of the rain. As he is tagged the neighbours should already know exactly where he is and are not taking him in to keep dry in his own house.
I would have a word with the owner to find out if they are willing to let him live with you.

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