Lost my 17 year old girl

[HeartbrokenCatMum]

I went away for 4 days and found my beautiful hilarious and very active tortie dead on the bathroom floor. I’m just so sad that she died without me, alone. If she could have just hung around a bit longer (I saw her on inside ring cam half a day before we got back) but the guilt is overwhelming. A neighbour was popping in giving wet food and she and the other cats were fine.

You know when a cat is special, there’s something more about them.. that was her. She gave the deepest, clingiest cuddles.. her purr vibrated through my body.. she used to climb up my body like I was a tree (ouch!) she meowed loudly constantly! She was a chatter. Really needy. She never buried her poos so the other cats had to do it. She explored every tiny bit of the house and got in every hidey place. Total mischief and cheekiness!
I have a dog, 3 other cats, kids but the house feels so empty and quiet, she was such a personality.
She was old and looked it but was still jumping off tall cupboards, even though she was bow legged.
The fleas have been terrible this year but she was always having treatments, and I’ve kept trying to get on top of it, I worry they’ve finished her off.

I just feel terrible and no-one else is feeling it like me, she was my baby. I know you will understand on here 🌹

I’ve been through plenty of human loss but this is feeling similar, which sounds awful. I just feel such loneliness, guilt, empty, the house is full of constant reminders 😰
I had her most of my adult life
I’m forcing myself to function as my kids are back at school in a few days but I just want to disappear for a while.

Thankyou for reading x

I understand how you must be feeling. I lost my 15 year old Burmese boy last year whilst we were away on a holiday. We had an agency checking in on him twice a day and sadly he took ill and had to be put to sleep. I privately cried everyday for weeks and still miss him over a year later. Focus on all the great memories and that she knew she was loved.

Thankyou so much and I’m so sorry for your loss of your beautiful boy, it feels harder knowing we weren’t there doesn’t it. But they do say they wait until we aren’t around before leaving us 😢

So very sorry for your loss, it is heartbreaking that you weren't there, though she was at home, with familiar sounds and scents about her, somewhere where she knew she was loved. 💐

So sorry, OP 🤍

That’s so comforting thankyou 🖤

Thankyou 💔

Lost our 19 years 2 months old cat 3 months to the day . Thought she would just die in her sleep but then she had a stroke and had to be put to sleep at the vets . It was terrible for myself and my son , it was all to quick ( but we was expecting it ) had her cremated and brought her back 6 days later and is now on my book shelf . I am so sorry for your loss x

I’m sorry for your loss too, 19 years of love.. wow 🖤 It’s never enough time is it? Thanks 💔

Sorry for your loss, I lost one of mine in January aged 11. I still miss her.
I just updated a recent post as currently i have one aged 10 at the vets very poorly not looking good.
I am sitting here thinking shes in the garden i need to get her inside now for bed but shes not here.
I am so sad.