Palliative care advice please

[Dolphinosep0tatoes]

My darling cat has just been diagnosed with aggressive cancer around her bowel.

I've done end of life care with cats before and the vet has been great, so I suppose I'm just seeking reassurance and tips.

What signs can I look for that she's in pain?
I thought she was in some yesterday following the appointment - withdrawn and twitchy - but today back to her old self.

Ideally, I'd like to spot pain before it gets bad enough that it's obvious.

I haven't got painkillers from the vet yet because I don't want to put her through the trauma of tableting her and she is hardly eating (although asking for food) which will make dosing food very difficult.

Which is partly why I'm so keen to be spot pain ASAP...I don't want her to suffer.

Op, that's rough and having lost 2 cats myself, I know exactly how it feels.
May I ask why you're not considering PTS now, given her condition and outlook, in order to guarantee that she'll feel no pain?

I know where youre coming from, and it's in the back of my mind too...

Two reasons...
She's still so lively it feels cruel.
Only found out at yesterday and was so shocked. Its happened really quickly.

She probably is. I agree with pp - I've been in this position and it was dreadful, but I kept mine alive for longer than I should have because I wasn't ready to say goodbye to her. It was not in her best interests at all. It's heartbreaking, but better a day too soon than a day too late.

It's just so rough. My second cat was found to have a condition that would mean she would soon start to feel pain, before death and I PTS at that point. She was a far easier decision that my first cat, as the second cat was going downhill fast. My first cat was a fighter and although she also had a poor prognosis, would put on a good show for the vet and then come home and get glassy eyed again. I ended up taking her to be PTS and the vet checked whether we were sure as she was 'looking normal'. I explained what was happening at home and she PTS but I was really, really upset for many weeks as the guilt was awful.
With hindsight, it was absolutely the right decision, as I knew that she was not right and could only do what was best for her. xx

So sorry, OP. We opted to let our girl go a week after she was diagnosed with stomach cancer last year. It was so hard because she was only ten, and her only symptom was vomiting so other than that she was totally “well” in herself - on the day we took her into the referral vet for scans she caught a mouse in the evening while we wept in puddles at her shock diagnosis.

We were told it was a very aggressive cancer, and while we could have done chemo or steroid treatment, it was only going to prolong her life for a short time, not cure her. She hated going to the vet and would have found that so distressing. I couldn’t bear the thought of her becoming sad and thin and, yes, presumably having pain so we got her booked in and made sure she had a lovely last week with us. (FWIW I asked our vet what she would do if it was her animal, and she said PTS.)

It’s honestly the hardest thing I have ever done as an adult and I miss her every day. I’m crying writing this! But I do think it was the best thing for her, if the very worst thing for us. I agree with pp who say better a week too early than a day too late. 🤍

There will be some minor changes in behaviours, but they are likely to be so subtle they're almost impossible to notice even when you're looking - as prey animals, cats are very good at hiding pain & injury.

I would book her in for quite soon, say a couple of weeks away, and spend the intervening time spoiling her (and at the same time yourselves) silly. Obviously if she shows signs of deteriorating quickly then all bets are off & get her in asap, but if not then you know she's had a great life, and even better couple of weeks, and will still be happy when she goes.

Thank you all for your replies. I had a good chat with the vet today and we're going to touch base again in a few days (or earlier if needed). I'm watching her like a hawk & have got painkillers. I just want to get it right.

After 3 weeks of doing brilliantly, playing, eating well and being really happy, she started to show go off her food 48 hours ago so we said goodbye today.

I know others are of the opinion to let them go as soon as you get the diagnosis but I feel really strongly we got it right - and did it while she was still happy, inquisitive and playful.

My heart is in pieces. I miss her so much already.

How sad for you, I'm so sorry you had to let her go.

But it does sound like you did the right thing – I'm really hoping I can be the same when it comes to that time.

I am so terribly sorry.
Bravo to you for being the very best and kindest mum ❤️

Thank you x