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My little cat smells of someone else's perfume

32 replies

GlomOfNit · 10/06/2025 23:14

Two lovely cats, both daytime-only outdoors ranging. They're brothers, and about a year and a half old. They are our delight, and we love them and they love us.

Since we started letting them out unrestricted (I tape the cat flap open because it's really stiff - let them out from about 8 or 9 and in by 7.30 or so) their habits have changed - they absolutely love the outdoors. By the time I get them back inside in the evening, they're tuckered out. They've discovered the delights of small rodents (cats will cat!) but we live at the edge of a village in a semi-rural area, and I'm not overly worried about their predation, which doesn't seem to be happening that much.

The larger of the two (and dafter) tends to stay close to/in the garden, comes when he's called. The smaller (and definitely the hunter of the two) very determinedly goes off in the morning and we may not see him for several hours at a time. He won't always come when he's called and we've had many anxious evenings calling and calling until, eventually, he strolls up. He's practically kitten-sized compared with his chunky brother - they're different builds. The vet says this is fine and that he's perfectly healthy, but it can be hard to get him to eat at home.

Anyway, yesterday it took ages to get him in after not having seen him all day. I was seriously worried he'd met a car or been locked in a shed. Eventually, he appears, we get him in. I notice he smells of a perfume that isn't mine. (I'm fairly sure it's not something from home I can smell on him, but wouldn't discount it entirely.) Again, today, after he'd been gone a while, we get them back in and again, the perfume.

Because I suspected he might have been enjoying someone else's hospitality at length, today I bought a very lightweight collar, intending to write something on it like 'please don't feed this cat, please don't let him in your house, he is loved', if he tolerated it. He really, really didn't! Sad I stupidly left the bell on and it scared him so badly it was a couple of minutes before we could catch him and remove it.

So conveying a message to a potential Lure-er via a collar isn't going to work.

I know cats just do this sometimes. But I can't bear the idea that we might lose him to someone cheeky and unprincipled. We love him so much. We pay for his vet bills, food, holiday care. We make sure he's safe.

We live on a road of 22 houses basically set on a road out of the village, surrounded by fields. Realistically, it's got to be someone in one of these houses. It can't just be a stray stroke (I'm not that petty!), as he really does smell of perfume. So - would I be unreasonable to try and nip this in the bud? Could I go door to door and explain nicely that I don't want him in anyone else's house? Could I just put a flier through the doors? I do know a handful of our neighbours obviously, and some of them are friends, so I'll start just by messaging around.

Am I being absurdly controlling?? Confused I know a couple of friends who have lost beloved cats because some cheeky fecker down the road just decided 'I'll have him' and lured them away. I can't stand the idea of this happening to us.

OP posts:
OnTheBoardwalk · 12/06/2025 00:08

Assume he's microchipped? Put that and the thought of expensive vet bills, insurance and pet plans out there they will need to pay

an outdoor Cat of mine years to go used to spend the day with neighbour but would come out soon as I got home. Not knowing where your cat is when you are expecting him and worried he might be trapped somewhere is not acceptable

although one of my cats is infatuated with grumpy neighbour who doesn’t like cats and spends the day looking at him through their window

CatSnackTagine · 12/06/2025 07:09

GlomOfNit · 10/06/2025 23:58

I was going to use the 'vet diet' line on a collar, but I don't think he's ever going to let me put one on him again! But yes, it'll be on a flier.

Don't be silly. Just take the bell off the collar and put it back on him
Do it when he's asleep if you must get someone to hold him, stroke him and give him treats while you do it.

My cat comes running when I get a new collar out of the bag for him as he knows he gets a posh snack from PAH with it 🙄

2ndbestslayer · 12/06/2025 07:15

Don't panic, it doesn't necessarily mean he's going to be poached. Our old cat used to amble over to the neighbours. We didn't even know until she mentioned it a while later. The cat always came home to us. With your cat being all dinky and cute it could just be someone picking him up for a cuddle.

tumblingdowntherabbithole · 12/06/2025 07:30

Be careful using collars - cats can get them caught on branches etc. and the injuries from trying to escape can be quite nasty.

CatSnackTagine · 12/06/2025 07:31

tumblingdowntherabbithole · 12/06/2025 07:30

Be careful using collars - cats can get them caught on branches etc. and the injuries from trying to escape can be quite nasty.

As long as they have the easy release catch they're fine

DelphiniumDoreen · 12/06/2025 08:01

Put a paper collar on him, “Please do not feed me - I have a medical condition so need a special diet.”

The vet told my Mum to do this when her cat started frequenting a certain establishment up the road.

SummerEve · 12/06/2025 08:23

JanetareyouokareyouokJanet · 11/06/2025 17:20

I doubt people are poaching your cats, maybe your cats nosey. I think this is all a bit dramatic.

I know, the drama of it all. This is what cats DO.

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