Am I doing the right thing.

[Andtheworldwentwhite]

my lovely boy. He is 16. He has had a brain problem for a few years. It makes him twitch , started in his head and is now moving down to the rest of his body. This will continue though the rest of his body.

He has had a few times of weeing on the sofa. And every so often he doesn’t clean himself or his poo comes out on its own. Not sure what.

He is loosing weight. The only way to sort all of these is to have tests done. But he has a heart murmur so sedating him with his age and heart isn’t the best idea.

The vet thinks eventually his brain will start effecting his legs.
we are on our second infection of the year. First was an eye infection and then now an ear infection.

After talking to my husband ( and our vet who is a friend of ours ) we are going to give him the lovely warm summer and then let him go.
He loves laying in the sunshine and sleeping. Which is what he is mainly doing now.

Main reason is the legs may go at any point. He seems to be getting less confident, he cries a lot more than he used to especially when he comes back in from the garden or during the night.

I am really struggling with this decision. I feel it is taking him earlier than maybe he should be going. But the thought of him loosing his ability to walk when he isn’t home ( he is an outdoor cat and gets distressed when being made to stay in ) feels me with fear. I don’t want him to suffer. He isn’t in pain at the moment. But his brain problem is causing toilet problems for him.

sorry I am rambling now. Just wanted to see what others would do.

Oh I’ve only just seen that bit! Yes I saw the thread in trending so I didn’t realise the topic at first, when I realised I was like god I’m bloody dim

So sorry that your dear cat is leaving you. Better to be a little early than a day late. As you say his legs might give way when he is away from home and that would be dreadful. Can you, as a short term measure make him an outdoor run for this last summer so that doesn't happen? Would he accept that? Otherwise, it is hard to know, but sooner is better than too late. They serve fish in heaven to happy cats - I have sent several there.

I only ever had one dog that looked straight at me and almost vocalised it's time.

Every time, it's so hard. But I think in the end, I always wish I'd taken them.in a little earlier. This is after four dogs and three cats over my lifetime.

If there is any way for the vet to come and do.it at home, I'd try for that. The vet stopped on his way home for one of our dogs and it was the best experiences, though still sad.

I like to take that adage a step further. I believe "better a week too soon than a minute too late".

I once had to push for an earlier PTS than the vet - who had just seen my girl a week prior - had thought necessary. Finally, when he saw her, he said I had been right.

Even if he hadn't made that admission, I knew I was right. Nothing would have deterred me from stepping in to make sure she didn't suffer.

I'm very sorry, OP. You did an amazing thing for this boy, and he has had a lovely life with you.

This is a heartbreaking decision to have to make, but you will know when the time is right. He will let you know.
We had to make that decision with our family cat last year and it was so sad (crying writing this) but she was so weak that she was ready to go. She'd had such a lovely life and was a good age....

Same here - vet came to us.

I think it's the least they can do after all those bills over all those years. I know they prefer you take them in, but if you push politely, they can accommodate a home visit at the start or end of the day.

I am a dog person but have been where you are with my dogs. One of the most helpful things I was ever told to remember is that cats and dogs have no notion of a "future" They can remember stuff but they can't think "I feel bad today but tomorrow might be better" "It hurts now/I am scared now" but it will end and I will feel ok." All that they know is NOW and now is horrible. I think the idea of one more summer is an attractive one but please be prepared to rethink. I am firmly of the week to early better than a day too late school, also depending on your vet you don't want to put yourself into a situation where the end is an emergency and not a planned and gentle situation. You may also want to look into vetinary euthanasia services. These are vets and vet nurses who only do euthanasia. The people I know who have used one, in various parts of the country have found them very good and often your vet will suggest it instead of them attending if you want it done at home. My heart goes out to you. It is the last kindest act we do for our beloved animals, we take on the stress and suffering so they don't have to.

I thought you were talking about a child for a minute. sorry.sweet cat.good luck, its v hard.

Ha. Me too. Saw vet, was like huh?, then checked subforum title, ahhhh.

It's not easy, but cats hide illness and pain very well. If he's incontinent I would let him go sooner rather than later tbh.
Having said that I've never got to the stage of PTS - first cat (childhood) died quite quickly from becoming ill. Then sadly one got run over, one went to live with a neighbour and one died suddenly with no signs of illness (this one we adopted later in her life). Our current one is getting on a bit and I'm already a bit nervous about what will happen if she gets really ill, but you just have to make that decision for them in the end. It is nice to think they will go with their beloved owners around them then be scared and collapse in the garden.
Good luck.

I’m so sorry you’re going through this.
But may I suggest you edit your post to clearly state it’s about your cat? I thought you were writing about your son (as you wrote about your lovely boy), and got a massive shock when you mentioned the vet.

I think it’s time now. He’s an absolutely gorgeous boy.

Better to let them go too soon, than a moment too late.

Thankyou for all ur messages. I didn’t think putting a message about my cat on the cat littertray forum would need explaining??? Surely this is a forum for cats not children?

I am going with what my vet has said. And giving him a while. She has seen him and knows him and is at our house regularly a few times a week. So she is happy for now. Thankyou for all ur kind works.

Oh, how I understand and hurt with you. I have been through something similar with my baby and was 13 when it began and almost 16 when naturally passed..in retrospect I have much guilt because he didn't enjoy life and wasn't in extreme pain but toward the last months would topple over. If I to go back I would have let him go early, I didn't know what to do but I feel like the most humane thing would have been to let him have less of the tough and less dignified days that he went to have. I'm so sad to hear that you're going through this with your love..sending best

Many posters are reading your post from the 'Trending' section, not via the 'Litter Tray', which is why the misunderstanding is happening OP. x

What a very handsome fellow.

I agree with everyone saying: “Better a day too soon, than a day too late.” A last day in the sunshine, his favourite food and to drift away in your arms painlessly.

It’s such a hard decision but the last gift you can give. The grief is so painful but outweighed by all the happiness they’ve brought us in their lives with us.

Sorry, I had clicked on your post from the active posts and I didn’t see that it was in the litter tray board 🤦‍♀️😂

Has your vet mentioned 'potential seizures, I.e. epilepsy? The thing is even people with heart-conditions can experience seizures. So putting two & two together makes sense. Let's hope he can see through the summer perfectly fine ❤️

Sorry to say but I would look at letting him go sooner than later. It's better he goes peacefully than his legs go when he's wondering round and no one is there to help him (hate to say it but would you want him to starve somewhere alone). I've just had to say goodby to my 16 year old dog and it really sucks but we have to do right by our fur babies.

He's failing. Be kind and don't let him suffer.

Oh my goodness, maybe starting by clarifying it's a dog would be a good start!!

I'm sorry he's unwell but that just gave me a shock.

Oh he is gorgeous. As hard (and god, it is so bloody hard) as it is, sometimes we have to put making sure our furry owners don’t suffer above our feelings. We had to make that decision with two of ours, Willow & Galli (both, incidentally, black beauties like yours) & we cried for weeks. Galli had cancer, Willow had a stroke, lasted the night unable to move and was helped out of pain the next day.

if your Vet friend thinks he’s ok, go with their
advice but keep an eye.

sending much love and hugs.

It’s a cat actually. And this is a cat forum. So not sure why I needed to add cat to the title.