Cat is dying.. how long should I wait until we PTS?

[Browndoor25]

My dear cat has kidney disease, hypertension, she is partially blind, underweight, has started peeing and pooping outside of the litter box, and seems confused in the evening (started pacing around the room) however she is still enjoying her food and she is drinking.

She was also at the emergency vets for a UTI on Sunday and she is going back to the vets on Thursday to get her blood pressure tested, etc but I am wondering if I am being selfish by keeping her here. I always thought I would wait until she stopped eating but now I don’t know what to do for the best. She still enjoys a fuss and a head scratch. Does anyone have any similar experiences or guidance? Thanks.

It sounds like she's ready. We let one of our cats go while she was still at the eating and drinking stage. She had a horrible, aggressive oral carcinoma which would only get worse, gnawing away at her quality of life as it did so. She was diagnosed on the Friday and we spent the weekend spoiling her. In that brief spell, we could see her start to retreat into herself as if the disease was taking her over. We took her back to the surgery on the Monday and let the vet do the only thing that could stop it. We didn't want to be left with loads of memories of our sweet girl suffering. She happily wolfed down a tin of tuna (her favourite❤️) before the appointment, and judging by how she rested on my arm as the vet prepped her, I think she was at ease.

When it was the turn of our other old lady cat the following year, the vet said better two weeks two early than one day too late. Your cat won't think the worse of you for sparing her misery. She's had a great life with you and she knows how much she's loved. All the best to your lovely puss and to you. 🌻

We’re having our elderly cat pts on Friday, she’s 20 years old. Coming to this decision has been hard but she’s completely deaf and confused. We’ve had a few incidents of soiling in different rooms but not lately and she’s asking for food but not always eating it. Her fur has started falling out and her eyes are leaky, all of this but I feel so guilty.

It sounds like time, OP. It is the hardest ever decision and the saddest thing, but also the absolute final act of love you can give your beloved pet, to peacefully fall asleep and be free of pain, with the people she loves stroking her as she drifts off. 🤍

Another one who thinks it’s time. I’m so sorry OP, I lost my wonderful 14yo to renal failure just over a month ago and it broke my heart, I do still question if I did the right thing but deep down I know it would have been cruel to let her suffer any more than she was just so I could keep her a bit longer. Sending you some unmumsnetty hugs it’s so tough 😢

My vet told me and my DS who's cat it was his good days are all behind him now and any future days will be harder for him. I'm glad he told us that because it meant we could have him PTS without feeling guilty. Do you think your cats good days are all behind her now OP and only harder days ahead for her? If you do think this, then now is the time. Don't feel guilty because you are doing her the last kindness you can. You are putting her comfort above your own want of having her around.

Hi all. I have read every post, I appreciate all your stories and input. I’m taking her to the vets tomorrow and I am going to see what they say about putting her to sleep. Off to buy some tuna for her to enjoy. Will keep you posted.

Cat before she started getting poorly. She’s always been such a lovely cat.

She's beautiful. I'm sorry you're in this situation. I've been there, many times.

Let your darling girl go.

Ah she’s lovely.

I asked two vets for advice, when 16 year old DCat had terminal cancer. They told me, cats hide it, when they are dying; but they really don’t like it, when they are messing themselves up - and she was. We gave her, her favourite meal of chicken and the vet came to the house to pts. At the time, we were devastated, but with the benefit of hindsight, it was the best thing we could do for her.

She is not going to get better, her quality of life is going to deteriorate, they can often go downhill terribly fast. I think you know in your heart how you need to repay her for the years of unconditional love she has given you.Think of the good times. Make the call.

(Take a few photos, in a couple of weeks time look at them, you will see how she looks with new eyes, we don’t always spot the changes when we see them everyday, you will know then without a shadow of doubt that you made the right decision)

Our DC was in a very similar situation to yours - stage 3 kidney disease, incontinence and confusion. (She was even the same colour as your cat - black with a white mark on her chest.) I asked the vet, who said that he thought that so long as I could put up with it, he didn’t think she was distressed and it was OK - but actually, it wasn’t. She’d been a house cat since the kidney disease because they were worried about her drinking dirty water from outside, and she never went out - used to sit in an open doorway looking out but wouldn’t cross the threshold. Then one day she just disappeared. I put up notices and appealed in our local groups and Facebook. Two weeks later, she was found up the road. We took her to the vets but she was not in a great state so we had her PTS - but truly, I just wish I’d done it before she decided to go walkabout. I thought she had taken herself off to die, because cats do this, but she was a feisty cat, and I think she just forgot where she lived and that she didn’t go out. I have no idea what she was doing during the two weeks, and I had knocked in doors and asked neighbours - so, OP, my advice would be to follow your instinct, and if you think it’s time, sadly it is.

She’s gorgeous, I feel an awful lot of the lucky cats who live a good life end with kidney failure -
both of mine did. it’s probably as typical as heart disease in humans.

So beautiful. We are actually thinking of getting a cat again after a hiatus after our last cat passed away as I was saying, at a ripe old age. Your photo and talking about our dear old cat (I’ve had cats twice and I really miss having one) has taken me back to the joy of those days. DC2 hasn’t yet had the chance to have a pet yet and everyone is super excited about potentially welcoming a new furry one to our household… We will need to put the cat door back in. So many lovely cats looking for homes at the rescue…

edited to say: sorry @OP if that is in poor taste but I just couldn’t help feeling emotional seeing your ohoto. It’s so difficult to say goodbye. I know. DC1 was very upset for quite a while here even though DCat was very much unwell when he had to leave us. DC don’t understand of course.

From your description it sounds like your dear cat is no longer enjoying a good quality of life and terribly sad though it is it’s probably time to let them go rather than continue to put them through numerous vet visits and treatments which in reality can only result in prolonging life - quantity but without the necessary quality. In your position, while I know it will be terribly hard and awfully sad, time to PTS.