Can't take much more with my cat!

[thetorturedpoetsdepartmentssecretary]

He's only nearly five months old, but getting wilder and wilder. He leaps at me and grabs my arm with all for legs, claws out. I'm scratched to bits.

I wear long sleeves. I play with him. He has thousands of toys.

He's not aggressive, I think he's just playful. I just don't know how to stop him. I've tried yelping at him but he doesn't react. I've tried ignoring him, he carries on. I've tried distracting him, it works briefly but he comes back. I'm exhausted. I've had many cats through my life but never one like this.

Another kitten isn't an option, I can't afford another and also have an older cat who isn't into kittens! as I found out too late.

I'll book him for neutering and hope it calms him down a bit. Just wondered if anyone has tips to stop him in the meantime.

Thanks but I'm not going to rehome him.

Yes I think I'll do that, see whether they wear each other out and then settle. I just feel mean because the older cat likes to sleep on my bed.

I am home most of the time, yes. I know he's a teenager, if you read my original postI'm looking for ways to cope with it or teach him it's not ok. Another cat is not an option.

If you can’t or won’t let him out, then a catio or cat-proof fencing is probably the best way to minimise this kind of behaviour.

Every single cat I’ve ever met with behavioural problems (including two of mine) had them because they were shut indoors. As soon as we let them out, the problems vanished within a week.

I get that. I thought I had destroyed my older cats life when I brought in the kitten. But we attend to assign human thoughts and emotions to our pets that they may not feel at all as they have different needs.

I'm still hoping one day my older cat will snuggle up to me in bed again. It's been over four months and I miss him.

Try to speak to them a lot and praise them. If they do something they haven't done before, e.g. sit closer together, reward with a treat so they start to see the other cat as positive. Basically see how you can facilitate them tolerating each other better, mostly for the benefit of the older cat. Who knows. They may start playing together. Give it a lot of time. Don't force anything. Mine are wrestling now and it's not something I could have given my cat.

I know your heart breaks for the older cat. But unless it turns out she absolutely can't live with another cat I believe you are doing her a favour by helping them to settle in. It can take ages for her to fully relax. I don't think my older cat is fully relaxed yet even after four months. The kitten got into a routine now and has started to calm down. He's 8 months now. 5 months were a nightmare. Hang in there.

This

For now I would consider this an annoying kitten habit rather than a behavioural issue. It's ridiculous to suggest. He's doing what 5 months old kittens do. Some kittens are easier than others.

The problem is that annoying kitten habits can easily turn into lifelong behavioural issues if the environment isn’t right.

We don't know if the environment is right or not. You speak from a point of view that all cats should be outdoors. The kitten isn't destructive. It is playing. It likes to wrestle with an arm. It's ridiculous to suggest rehoming based on that.

I never said it should be rehomed.

But I firmly believe all cats should have access to the outdoors (health issues aside). Keeping a cat locked in four walls is the equivalent of getting a bird and keeping it locked in a cage.

A friend bought a medium sized dog crate for the kitten(s) to live in whilst they got used to the house and family. They developed normally and didn't cause any harm to home or humans when they were liberated.

Not all cats are suited to being indoor cats. Ours would go mental if shut in.

I think cats kept indoors must go crazy.

Do you have a laser pen toy? Would that help you tire him out while you can remain at a distance?

So would ours.

They need different care that goes beyond using the catflap and snuggling up on the sofa with their human at night.

I know this won’t help with your problem, but it might be useful to someone here thinking a getting a kittten. This is partly why I have pedigree cats. From ‘proper’ breeders, who are registered with the GCCF, they have to remain with the mother until they are 12 weeks old. During that time they learn from mum and copy her using a litter tray and a claw post. They will also be belted by her if they try the clawing game. I have had Siamese cats for 40 years and by the time I have taken each one home, they all know their ‘manners’. Mine also go out. They tend to stay in our garden for months before they venture further afield.

Your situation is a tough one, but this time will pass as yours matures. In the meantime, keep those arms wrapped up 💐

Good plan. But unless you literally live on the top of a 20 storey tower with no outdoor space whatsoever I would strongly recommending you do let him out. Once he's been neutered.
The frustration of being kept in will be exacerbating his scratchy wildness.

I agree with the Feliway (or similar) diffuser. You might also want to try Zylkene at least until he's been neutered. And unless he's very small indeed, I'm a bit disappointed with your vet saying leave it until 5 months - current recommended best practice is 4 months.

Have a look on YouTube for Jackson Galaxy talking about Catification of indoor spaces. He is the ultimate cat whisperer and behaviourist and has some brilliant tips. You might also be able to catch a few episodes of his "My Cat From Hell" series on some obscure TV channel, always a good watch.

Thank you. He recommended waiting because the kitten wasn't well when he was little, so he wanted his stomach to settle.

Thanks for the recommendations, I'll look up Jackson Galaxy.

I can't because cats have been killed in the area, also there's a busy road nearby. We don't all live in leafy suburbs with huge gardens!

I have one, yes. I'll use it more.

The main possible I now have with that is that my older cat eats different food to the kitten and the kitten had an upset tummy when little, so I'm keeping him on his own food to avoid further upset. The only way around this would be to just put kitten food down at night for both cats.

@thetorturedpoetsdepartmentssecretary a microchip feeder is another possibility. I got one for the same reason. It's a bit expensive but I think it's good to have one anyway should one cat require medication for example.

Mine would attack me if I dared to say no or turf him out of the bathroom away from my plants. He's nearly 6 and thankfully doesn't do it anymore because it flipping hurt. He played and still does with soft paws (no claws).