Can somebody please tell me if I'm doing the right thing?

[TheLurkingOne]

Our lovely 14 year old cat has been going downhill since the summer. Retching and coughing. Losing weight.
He's bern on thyroid medication and steroids for about 4 or 5 years.

Two weeks ago he stopped eating and drinking. The vet put him on a saline drip, gave him an appetite stimulant and he basically came back to us a bit. She did xrays and bloods and suspects lymphoma. He was so upset as he had to stay overnight. I just wanted him home.

He didn't bounce back fully and was rating very little. He has been eating and drinking virtually nothing for the last 3 days. He looks uncomfortable and can't settle. I gave him half a creamy treat yesterday and he threw it straight up.

The vet is coming in an hour to put him down as I don't want him to suffer. But she thinks we should be trying him on the appetite stimulant etc instead. I think why? It might fix him temporarily but he's not going to get better.

I'm so sad. I love him so much. I just want to do the right thing for him. Am I wrong in having him put down now? Should I be trying to eke more time out for him?

He's sitting in the utility room watching some cows through the window. I think that's what's bothering me. He still has the energy to look at the cows, say hi to us and try to purr. Except the purring sets him off Retching.

I'm so sad. I wish I knew if this was the right thing to do.

You definitely did the right thing. You knew in your heart you couldn't put your kitty through more. He went in a pain free way. I know it's hard on you especially before Xmas. I got one of those photo frames with the cut outs in and put lots of photos of my kitty in there. I've got 2 more kitties now that needed a good home. They will never replace my Marcus but I do love them both.

You did the right thing, op. When my old boy had mouth cancer, it felt such a dilemma when to do it. He would perk up temporarily when put on steroids, but there was no future in that. He had reached the end, and there would be needless suffering.

I brought him to the vets to be put asleep. I would do what you did if I ever had to make that decision again as it is kinder. A gentler way to just fall asleep in the comfort and familiarity of their own home.

I felt awful making the decision for mine as he was still alert and eating and happy

But he had a urine issue where he would be in his tray 30 times and the vet said the steroid injections would stop working eventually
I decided I didn't want it to be a 2am rush to the OOH vet with him in pain and he was frail looking back on photos now, it was the right choice

I was fine until I got to the vet and reception handed me a message saying "nobody should have to pay for this as we don't want you to feel you paid to lose him". My lovely online friends had paid the entire vet bill including individual cremation for him

I miss him still every day but he sent me a very similar cat with some odd quirks to keep me busy!

Our lovely girl was diagnosed with lymphoma in April. Her only symptom was vomiting, over about six months, and the vets were never concerned as she ate like a horse, was completely normal in all respects, and hadn’t lost any weight. Even the specialist referral vet thought it was going to be cat IBS when we brought her there, until the scan showed a massive mass in her tummy. The biopsy showed large cell lymphoma, and we were given a best case prognosis of 12 months with IV chemo, and weeks on steroids.

We opted to let her go “well” with no treatment, the week later. That probably sounds terrible. It was absolutely awful, because on her last day she was racing about the garden and eating happily - but vomiting with blood in it. Our own vet said she would have done the same. It was only going one way, and carting her out to the specialist place for chemo would have been incredibly distressing for her.

Did we go too soon? I tear myself apart wondering. But she didn’t get a chance to get frail and thin and sad, and she went to sleep with a full tummy of her favourite foods (Philadelphia cheese and tinned tuna) after lying out in the sun, with us telling her how much we loved her. I think we did the best for her, and it sounds like you did the same for your boy.

Sending lots of love, OP. I felt quite mad with grief afterwards. We adopted a little orange boy quickly, and he was an excellent distraction. I did wonder if I would ever properly love him at the start. I do now. I am certain our girl sent us the cat I needed.

I'm so so sorry @TheLurkingOne it's such a horrible decision to have to make. I think you did the right thing though because he'd been ill for a while and wasn't getting better. It was an act of love and compassion, and I'm sure you gave him a lovely life.

We just lost our cat last week (terminal mouth cancer) and I'm heartbroken but I know we did the right thing by letting her go than prolonging her suffering.

Thank you all again. Now that yesterday is over I can see it was the right thing to do for our beautiful boy. Here's a picture of him.

He's beautiful ❤

He's gorgeous xx You did the right thing 💔

What a lovely cat. I love the little smudge under his nose.

Beautiful boy at rest now.
I was going to write it sounded like it was time, been there myself it's awful but you know afterwards it's the right thing. The doubt in the lead up is torture tho. I let my last cat go on too long and I have a bit of guilt about that. Sending hugs xx

When you go back and read your first paragraph you'll see that you were 100% right . Even though he was purr-ey ot sounds like he was telling you that it's time y'know
You did the right thing for him .

It's a tough decision to make but really it can be the only one sometimes .