The Guilt

[UniKittyCorn]

My boy was PTS last night, I had to make the decision and the guilt I feel is unbearable.

He had to be put under GA and he was really touch and go but he pulled through and kept fighting. I feel like I gave up on him.

His kidneys had stopped functioning properly for the second time in a month. I was advised it could keep happening so I made the decision but now it just feels like it was the wrong.

He pulled through surgery after nearly crashing and I gave up on him. He was only 8.

Kidney failure is no small thing. You made the choice not to let him suffer. Don't beat yourself up.
It's sad he only had 8 years, but presumably you gave him a nice life.

I'm so sorry, OP. What a terribly difficult decision. You did the best you could, by the sound of it. And you may well have saved him a lot of suffering.

I am so sorry for your loss. 💐

My beautiful girl was PTS a few weeks ago. She had Stage 4 kidney disease.

I imagine that the vet's diagnosis was that your cat had irreversible damage to his kidneys, meaning that the best you could do, medically, was to treat symptoms, not regain function. Cats can live with reduced kidney function for some time (many years, even) – but If he had crashed twice in a month, that suggests that you were already at a quite high loss of function (like mine was). That means he would not have had a long life expectancy.

I imagine your heart is broken and you want one more hug. I feel that way too, although I know that medically, I 100% made the right decision.