My cat was PTS this morning. Please tell me this feeling gets better.

[sporkandnoodles]

She was my little soul mate. I absolutely adored her and her me.
She has been sick for a while and this morning was pts.

I am so scared I made the wrong decision. I feel absolutely broken. The idea that I will never see her again is horrible and now I wish I'd been selfish and waited a bit longer. All her things are still in the house. Everything reminds me of her and I feel physically in pain. I have cried and wailed. I never thought it would be this bad, it's like I'm being suffocated.

How do I get through this?

Oh OP. I am so sorry. We had to put our lovely girl to sleep earlier this year. She was only ten and it was far, far too young. She had intestinal lymphoma which was only going one way, even if we had opted for invasive chemo which she would have found very distressing. I agonised for ages afterwards if we went in too soon, but the idea of her going downhill and deteriorating and stopping eating was unbearable - I know we did the right thing for her even though it was the very worst thing for us.

I was absolutely grief stricken. Honestly worse than when my dad died (sorry if that offends anyone). I still miss her every day, and I instinctively look for her coming racing down from the back of the garden when I look out the kitchen window or open the back door. I got a collage of photos printed and put in a beautiful frame, and also had one of her paw prints done as a tattoo. We have her ashes in an urn on the hearth with another framed photo. She will never not be in our home.

We adopted a little boy cat from Cats Protection very quickly. He is a very different character, an ex stray kitten who took a while to settle, but is an absolute joy and seeing him become “our cat” and develop into a lovely cuddly fella has been a delight. He may be a “rescue cat” but really he rescued me when my heart was shattered into a million pieces.

I've woken up feeling a little less raw but absolutely shattered. Normally if I felt like this she'd be by my side, snuggled up in bed with me, taking a little bit of the pain away with her nose bops.
When I'd have a stressful day at work, I'd come home and bury my face in her tummy fluff and take a deep breath. It instantly calmed me. She was so much more than a pet to me.
It hurts so much. I never imagined it would be worse than losing a human but it is in some ways because she had become such an important part of my emotional regulation and stress control.

I hope she knew how wonderful she was. When we were at the vets i kept thanking her for taking such good care of all of us and telling her what a good girl she was.

Sorry for your loss x

we had our dog PTS 18 months ago and it’s still raw even now 😢
He was my bestie, we went everywhere together, he was going to be the only thing to keep me sane whe I was off work for nearly 4 months after an accident, unfortunately 2 weeks after my accident we had him PTS, so my companion and comforter was taken from me 😢😢
we’ve still got his bowls, leads and collars here, I can’t bear to get rid of them and I’ve got a memorial garden in his favourite sunny spot in the garden

I’m so sorry for your loss OP.
The pain will become more bearable in time but allow yourself to grieve now.
It sounds like your cat was really special and very much loved. She brought a lot to your life but so did you to hers. Letting an animal be PTS is a hard and brave thing to do, and you did it for selfless reasons, when it would have been easier on you to keep her here for longer, so try to take comfort in that.

So sorry @sporkandnoodles , it is a really tough time. You know you have done the very best for her but it hurts so much. |I still cry for my little love who died in January and I expect I will shed tears for years to come, it is the price of the love that he brought into my life. Many posters have said such lovely things, including that the pain you are feeling is the pain she is no longer feeling, and I hope you get some solace from the companionship of others who have lost also. Please feel free to talk as much as you want to about your lost love and how you are feeling, and if you ever wish to, it would be lovely to see a picture 💐

I am so, so sorry to read this and empathise totally. I had my beautiful 12 year old Bengal PTS on Monday. He went from a perfectly healthy boy a month ago to unable to walk and dragging himself around the house following an abscess and a tooth removal.

I’ve tortured myself thinking what went wrong and did I explore enough treatment options before I made the decision, but my vet suspected he had a deep seated brain tumour as his bloods didn’t indicate any form of infection etc and he had withdrawn and was head pressing. She wisely said, let him go whilst he’s still a handsome boy and not a sad shell of his former self and in pain.

If it’s a tiny bit of comfort, there seem to be stages of grief in losing a beloved pet. All the family were inconsolable on Monday evening and even talking about him brought that awful welling up feeling. The sun came out on Tuesday and illuminated his favourite napping spot on top of my throw basket which set me off again, but I’m starting to smile at memories rather than sob. I’m still raw and even people being kind sets me off, but I totally get your sadness. I’m a total cat person and know what they mean to us.

Your little girl knew she was loved right until the end so please take some comfort from that. Each day you will feel a tiny, tiny bit stronger and if you want to cry, do. There’s nothing wrong with that. You don’t have to explain yourself to anyone. Xxx

Of course you miss her, I hated being catless, and adopted my tomcat 28 days later.
i did love my queen cat, not any less tho, remember the love and the times you had

I'm so so sorry about your little soul mate.
It is very hard.Take care and grieve for as long as you need to.
My cat was put to sleep 4 months ago, and we still miss him.
I found this little poem, and although it is touching, I found it gave me some peace.
"A cat outlives, a mouse, a flower, a summer, but it is never enough.
The heart still yearns for him long after he is gone "