Introducing kittens

[bigboybenny]

We have a 5 month old kitten and 2 weeks ago adopted another rescue kitten aged approx 3.5 months. I know introducing cats can be a tricky affair but I was expecting it to be more straight forward with kittens. However, so far that has not been the case.

The new kitten is based in an upstairs bedroom and we followed the advised process of feliway plug ins, swapping scents, swapping sites when the other is safely in another room, etc. Unfortunately, the older kitten ran into the new kitten’s room unexpectedly and they had a bit of a stare off and there was a bit of hissing. Since then, the little one sleeps behind the door in her room.

They’ve had a couple of encounters since then and there has been hissing and growling, mostly from the new kitten. I assume it’s mostly due to fear as the 5 month old is much bigger. The little one was abandoned with her siblings and then lived in a pen at a rescue centre so hasn’t had much experience of normal life and is very, very nervous. When we’ve shut the other one away and given her free roam she has barely come downstairs and the slightest noise sees her bolt back to her room or my room under the bed.

So I’m now feeling rather stuck and unsure of how to proceed. When we are out at school/ work we have to leave the little one in her room, which is quite small as our house is quite open plan and there is no way to segregate other than shutting the older one in the kitchen which she wouldn’t be happy with. They do get a lunchtime visit for food/ play but I want to get to a situation where both cats are free to roam the house while we’re not here but I don’t know how to progress with introductions when the little one is so nervous.

Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

Do they both use the litter tray? I'm guessing this part is all ok?

When you feed them, try giving them their wet food on a spoon so that they have to interact with you and each other at least once a day. And handle the little one as much as you can as early as you can. When she bolts under the bed, get her out using string to tempt her to chase it. Bring her to all the rooms with you so that she knows they are there and let her work her way round them one by one.

I'd probably be having her on my knee in the evenings as well, and letting her explore whilst I am there. There's nothing quite like a kitten snuggling into your elbow crook and start snoring.

In time, I'd just leave them to find their own way of getting to know each other, and play with them together. They have to work it out for themselves. Leave them lots of things to chase and play with during the day and let them get on with it. They will be best mates in no time.

No litter tray issues so far. New kitten has tray, food and water in her room so they don’t currently interact during meal times. They don’t see each other at all and so much advice on the Internet says it needs to be done slowly to avoid them hating each other that I feel paranoid now, but clearly they do need to meet at some point! I really want to get on with it but don’t want to get it all wrong and end up with sworn enemies.

Growling and hissing is completely natural. It is how they establish who is top cat and who isn't.

I have 9 strays and ferals living in my garden [only one comes into the house] and it has taken a long time to learn that the earlier you hand feed at least one wet food meal a day, and play with them the sooner they get along with each other. I split meat juice on one's head and 10 mins later he had 3 kittens on top of him cleaning his head off. They are food and play motivated so you really need to get them together with that so that they have something else to think about rather than just sniffing each other.

Have a look at the Jackson Galaxy videos on YouTube. He's the ultimate Cat Whisperer and has loads of advice.

Where's the Cat Tax?

It's totally normal for newly introduced cats to hiss and growl - it's not necessarily aggression - more fear and uncertainty, especially with kittens.

Oops, sorry - here are the little tykes.

I would have her on my knee but she’s not been as far as the front room yet and I don’t want to force her. She’s quite friendly in her safe zone and will sit on laps and be fussed, but is very nervous in the rest of the house.

Ive not tried spooning out food so could try it to build up the trust. The other kitten isn’t a fan of wet food though, so it’d have to be dry for her.

The other kitten not being a fan of wet food - get some high value treats - Dreamies, churu cream sticks, or even the meat stick jerky kind of stuff. Never met a cat who doesn’t go crazy over at least one of these things. Make being near each other a worthy experience because they get super delicious food.

She does love a lick e lix and is partial to dreamies, etc. We’ve had them simultaneously eating lick e lix either side of a door so hopefully that is building some good vibes between them. I think we are going to attempt to get them in a room together tomorrow so wish me luck!

Oh my goodness they are beautiful kittens 😻😻😻

Try a baby gate or some kind of screen acroos the open doorway so they can start to see each other. Let them sniff and hiss (they're just testing eaxh other out) and build confidence around each other. You can start to use food or play to encourage them being near each other as a positive experience. Don't rush or force it, if one wants to hid/ not interact just let them retreat to their safe place and try again later, little by little they will get there.

Hissing at 2 weeks in absolutely normal. My senior lady hissed at my new girl for weeks. Its not gearing up to fight, its saying "I am feeling uncertain/insecure, give me space". If its mainly the smaller one it will probably stop once they feel more confident in their territory, which could take several weeks for a nervous cat. Don't be disaheartened by one standoff, just take it slow. Scent-mixing takes a while, keep swapping their blankets, toys and grooming brushes. When I first got new girl, and she had her own room, I did the feeding on either side of a closed door too. Then after a few days, I opened the door a crack, and gave them high-value treats on either side of it. Then I removed the door altogether and gave them high-value treats right next to each other.. We also had an unfortunate standoff when the little one shot out of her room, they saw each other unexpectedly and started screeching. Now they're absolutely fine. They aren't best buds but they'll lie pretty close to each other and sometimes touch noses/lick each other's head. But even now, senior lady will do the odd hiss if little one is getting too hyper (usually if its rained all day and she's gone into her evening mad hour with an excess of energy). I think once your kitten gains confidence you'll see real changes.

Thanks for all the advice. We did the Jackson Galaxy eat, play, love approach last night and it seemed to go well. Both cats were engaged in play and it was ages before the big one spotted the little one. A tiny bit of hissing and a little bat from the big one but then she walked off and laid down. We’ll try again tonight.

We’ve been trying to take it slowly with the kittens but it hasn’t gone too well. They’ve briefly been in the same room together (not on purpose) and there was a lot of batting each other and chasing. The tables seem to have turned this week and the little one seems less afraid of the big once (hence accidentally coming into contact as she runs out of her room even though she can see the big one there) but it seems to be the big one who is now being more aggressive. She is the one chasing and pouncing on the little one. They’ve also been doing a lot of batting paws under the door.

it doesn’t feel too positive so I’m not sure if I need to go back a notch and keep them out of sight of each other for another week. I’m hoping to pick up a 2nd hand stair gate to help with the process tomorrow. It is a bit depressing though as the longer this goes on for, the longer the little one is stuck living in a box room, which doesn’t seem fair.

Also, the older kitten will not leave the little one’s room alone. She’s constantly outside and I put boxes etc to barricade the door and stop the paw batting but she moves them out the way. She’ll lay outside even if the other kitten doesn’t interact, but then if she comes face to face with her she’s pretty rough. I don’t get cats!

Paw batting is play! It's a good sign in my experience.

I have eight cats all acquired over the years and they do rub along with each other. There will be hissing and chasing that normal, unless they are absolutely howling, they are probably fine.

I would let them get to to know each other and only intervene if one seems particularly upset or cowering and properly annoyed with the other one. You can usually tell if things aren't going well because they will be visibly shaken and out of sorts. The other kitten will probably claim that "I never touched them Mum!". Sometimes it's vey like child rearing...

It's called Smack Attack and they all do it.

Just let them get on with it.

Check out Jackson galaxy on YouTube, he has a lot of advice on introducing cats of all ages.

My two boys were about 1.5 years apart and the little one basically forced the older one to be his friend. Mainly by licking. A bit of hissing happened at the beginning but they were a team by a few weeks together.
Make sure they've got their own feeding areas and bowls, and if you can give them outdoor access that is perfect.
The worst case scenario I've had was a pair of siblings, who didn't hate eachother but would never ever spend a minute in the same room!

I’m still getting nowhere with introducing these kittens. I got a stair gate but they can fit through so I’ve had to improvise with ribbons across etc and their encounters have mostly batting each other through the bars. They’ve been in the same rooms a few times, mostly inadvertently, as they are getting quicker at dashing out of doorways and over barriers.

The encounters are always the same - fighting, batting, biting and pouncing. I know kittens play that way sometimes but it looks aggressive and not playful to me (mainly the older cat). The little one ends up on her back being mauled at and ends up squeaking / hissing. We separate them but whenever they are together again the same thing happens.

We’ve trying giving them treats and they will eat in each other’s company but as soon as the food’s gone they start on each other again. If we try and play with the fishing rod toys the little one will join in but the older one is more focussed on pouncing on/ chasing the little one.

I’ve never had cats before so maybe this is all normal behaviour but it feels like it will carry on until one of them actually gets hurt and the younger one is tiny and literally half the weight of the older one so it doesn’t feel right to just leave them to it. Happy to be told I’m being pathetic and that’s just how kittens are but I’ve still got no clue in how to proceed to them both having free rein of the house.

Honestly, in my many, many years of experience of cats and kittens this is entirely normal. They will try and work out their own relationship. The fighting chasing and squeaking is perfectly normal, especially amongst kittens. The kitten will squeak to get the bigger cat to back off. Sometimes, they will squeak even before the big cat has touched them!

You will know if there's something really wrong with their relationship because there will be persistent growling, yowling and hissing as soon as they see each other. There will be actual screams if it's a real fight. They will be visibly shaken and avoidant of people and cats if they are hurt.

Play batting, swiping and bouncing is all learning behaviour. Please for your own sanity, let them work it out. You cannot moderate their behaviour like dogs. As long as the bigger cat has somewhere that the kitten can't annoy them, preferably up high, they will be fine. The kitten will also need it's own safe space where the big car can't annoy it either.

Trust me, they will be friends/frenemies/ tolerate each other. Cats are not dogs.

How long has it been now? I would say my girls took a good 6 weeks to really be happy together. Occasionally my senior girl will give the newbie a short reprimand if she's getting too crazy, but I think that's fine - there's no violence in it and its only what a senior cat does to a kitten. I would say that in two kittens, batting and pouncing is most likely 90% play. My young girl loves to bat and slap. As in any play, it may shade over into one getting too rough for the other, particularly if there's a size difference, but I wouldn't read too much into a hiss. For my senior lady, a hiss means 'stop that', and to be fair to my young girl, she understands and does. As @TheLongRider said, an actual cat fight is unmistakable and awful. They scream and employ full claws and teeth. Its also pretty rare - its not in cats interest to fight as almost certainly they will both be hurt.

What I'd do if I were you at this point is short exposure sessions, and seperate them before one starts getting too rough. Just a few minutes at a time. Don't give it the opportunity to escalate. Pick one up and separate whilst they're still in a relatively low key state. Also plug in some Feliway diffusers, preferably Feliway Optimum. They're not cheap but they do work.

The other thing to consider is if any physical issues are playing into their comfort levels. They are young so this one won't apply, but my older cat is much more patient and tolerant with my young one since I started her on YuMove, which is a supplement for their joints. She's a senior and she broke her ankle when she was young, so she certainly has some degree of athritis somewhere. As to the little one, she's an allergic girl. She has itchy skin and some scabbing. Getting her on a restricted diet and a hypoallergenic collar has improved this a lot. Less itching = less hyperactive and more settled.

So I’m pleased to report that there has finally been some progress! We let them ‘play fight’ it out instead of instantly separating them and got to the point where they could be in the same room without instantly launching themselves at each other. Since then we’ve have been giving them more exposure to each other and yesterday even managed to have them both on the sofa together!

Smaller kitty is completely fine and loving her new found freedom of being able to spend more time in the house instead of her base camp. She’ll initiate play and chasing but all in good fun. It is more difficult for resident kitten. Things have improved massively in a few days and she’ll sleep and relax near kitty and if she bounds over wanting to play but she’s not in the mood she’ll mostly just ignore her, but she seems tense and on edge and is always watching her like a hawk.

The ‘play’fighting has reduced but every now and again it will get a bit rough resulting in squeals and hissing from small kitty, as it’s resident cat that gets a bit rough.

Is it now just a case of giving it time so that resident kitten can see that the new kitty is not a threat to her? It is there anything I could be doing to help the process? I am still shutting the little one away for short periods just to give them both space and have been feeding them high value treats when they’re together, but not sure if there’s anything else I could be doing.

There’s one slight further complication in that resident kitten had started going outside for short periods (she’s just turned 6 months old) and loved it but about 10 days ago I noticed she was avoiding the back room and utility where the cat flap is. It transpired that a male cat, possibly an unneutered stray, has not only been hanging around but was smashing against the microchip catflap trying to get in. I think this has completely freaked her out and now she is very reluctant to go out and tentative about going in the back room / utility. Obviously this isn’t helpful with the new kitten situation as means resident cat is already quite stressed.

I haven’t seen the stray for a while but he could be coming while we’re at work / school.

Little cat has to learn that big kitten is the boss and that she has the right to lay down the paw law. There will probably be some squeaking for a couple more months until they are both closer to adult size.

I'm sorry for your older kitten and the marauding Tom. I hope your girl is spayed.

How are they doing ?