Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

The litter tray

Join our community of cat lovers on the Mumsnet Cat forum for kitten advice and help with cat behaviour.

Choosing between rescue cats

83 replies

Esgaroth · 16/09/2024 14:53

Following on from my other thread but with a more specific question. We have the chance to adopt one of two cats. We went to see them today and I definitely didn't 'just know' and neither did DH. They were quite different but both lovely.

Both cats are 4/5 year old males. They are brothers but not bonded so the rescue say they don't need to stay together. They were raised in a house and were left behind when their owners moved (unbelievable!) but otherwise seem to have been well cared for, neutered and chipped. They have been in the rescue as no foster homes have been available yet - have only been there a few weeks. No known health issues.

Cat 1 was very chilled out, sniffed our fingers, rubbed his head on our hands and accepted head strokes and treats from our hands. He was purring a lot and he didn't get up, just lay there seemingly enjoying the attention. He was gorgeous and seemed confident and friendly, but did not approach us.

Cat 2 was shyer and more cautious, but also very curious. He did sniff us a little and accepted a few strokes on the cheek but was more wary of us. He almost started playing with his toys a few times but it was as though he didn't quite dare. The volunteer let him out and he was very keen to explore, though he moved very slowly and carefully and he looked at us a lot. He accepted treats placed near him but not from our hands.

I feel like Cat 1 is maybe a safer bet for a first cat? But there was something very appealing about Cat 2 that made me think he could be a real character once he'd settled down and made himself at home.

What do you think? And I know people will say to get both but we only want one cat really.

OP posts:
Gardendiary · 16/09/2024 15:28

Cat 2, even in your op it’s clear that cat 1 is the sensible choice and cat 2 is the one you really want. Don’t get two if you don’t want two cats

AgainstRegulations · 16/09/2024 15:29

Both!

Personally I’ve had literally dozens of cats over the years and found that the majority benefit from having another cat around. Exceptions apply though and I wouldn’t introduce a kitten to an elderly cat because it’s likely to be too stressful for them but otherwise I find that two work better for them(and me) than just one.

Compash · 16/09/2024 15:31

TheCultureHusks · 16/09/2024 15:27

Yep OP, we’ve had this too. Delighted and totally came out of their shell when the other one died!!! Practically dancing on the grave 🤣🤣

A lot of cats are genuinely happier owning their space

Hate to say it, but when our ginger boy died last year, our black girl - after an initial grieving period - has really come out of her shell and asserted herself. Her occasional irritable bowel cleared up too.

I'd love another cat - or two - but she is living her best life, and I couldn't do it to her... 😻

Drachuughtty · 16/09/2024 15:32

Maybe get neither? After a couple of times picking the wrong cat I always make sure I get one where it's love at first sight. (From me obviously! Not the cat! With cats you have to earn their love! ) Are there other options?

Blackfluffycats · 16/09/2024 15:34

Firmly in the both camp!! I have 2 cats and they are so close. I know when the older one goes the younger one will be really lost.

but if you are making me choose cat 2 because he is less likely to get picked by someone else if he is cautious.

still both though.

FoxtrotOscarKindaDay · 16/09/2024 15:39

Cats coming from a home into a rescue environment often struggle to adapt. Just because the rescue says they aren't bonded, doesn't mean they aren't. The shyer cat could be really struggling and distancing himself.

Jyckin · 16/09/2024 15:40

I have a boy and girl brother sister and the girl is much more independent and sounds like cat one. My boy who's a total mummy's boy and a lot more playful than his sister sounds like cat 2 ! Personally I'd take them both x

KimFan · 16/09/2024 15:41

Have both. So much better for their well-being :)

pinneddownbytabbies · 16/09/2024 15:44

Cat 2 would be more of a challenge I reckon, so it depends how experienced a cat slave you are really, and whether you are prepared for weeks of cleaning up cat spray or sitting on the floor in the spare room coaxing him out from under the bed. Cat 1 would just eat and sleep and not be arsed!

xxSideshowAuntSallyxx · 16/09/2024 15:44

Take both, I took two sisters and they sound exactly like the two at the rescue. One was more outgoing than the other but the shyer one probably needs the more outgoing one.

Spenditlikebeckham · 16/09/2024 15:47

I had 2 db dcats.. 1 died. His db was grief stricken.. We got a dkitten..
Happy ending. 4 years in still besties.
Get both... Or you will have us hunt you down.....
Seriously everyone loses out of you leave 1 behind. And I assure you guilt will haunt you.

StarCourt · 16/09/2024 15:52

Take cat 2 as he will struggle most to find a home. I'm currently fostering a timid cat and people who want to adopt and have been to see him won't have him for this reason.
We've had him 4 weeks and it took him 2 days to settle with us. now he is confident, funny, playful and loves his cuddles, from us. Not strangers but nobody seems to realise he needs time to settle into a new home and new people. Its such a shame as he is gorgeous.

HarrietBond · 16/09/2024 15:52

Cat 2. You sound like you feel like you should prefer cat 1, but you really liked cat 2. So get cat 2.

pinneddownbytabbies · 16/09/2024 15:55

It may be that cat 2 is cautious because cat 1 is the dominant

Good point.

Happygrinchmas1 · 16/09/2024 15:59

Both both both. We have a rescue brother and sister and while they don't always choose to sleep together or be together sometimes they do and they are definitely a pair

Esgaroth · 16/09/2024 16:00

Yes, I must admit that did occur to me. But also I suppose it's not surprising to be a bit freaked out after having been abandoned, living semi rough for a while and then brought to a strange new place. They'd only been there half a month but he was more friendly with the volunteer who he obviously knew a little.

OP posts:
Esgaroth · 16/09/2024 16:07

I don't know if cat 2 would relish living with a couple of primary aged kids, though. Not that they are disrespectful of cats - they know to be gentle and calm and quiet with them, but obviously they can be louder and faster than us when moving round the house.

My kids are 7 and 9, so not little little, but still very different from adults.

OP posts:
sassyduck · 16/09/2024 16:09

Both.

thecatneuterer · 16/09/2024 16:10

urbanbuddha · 16/09/2024 14:56

The cat that came to you. You should always let cats do the choosing.

And that's why shyer cats can be stuck in rescue for months or even years. It's always the very confident cats that get adopted because it makes people think they have been chosen.

thecatneuterer · 16/09/2024 16:11

KimFan · 16/09/2024 15:41

Have both. So much better for their well-being :)

Absolutely

Scampuss · 16/09/2024 16:21

Cat 2. His curiosity will win out and I bet he turns out to be quite playful once he's settled with you.

Trust the rescue's assessment if they think they'll be better apart. Most domestic cats do prefer to be singletons.

Reugny · 16/09/2024 16:56

Esgaroth · 16/09/2024 16:07

I don't know if cat 2 would relish living with a couple of primary aged kids, though. Not that they are disrespectful of cats - they know to be gentle and calm and quiet with them, but obviously they can be louder and faster than us when moving round the house.

My kids are 7 and 9, so not little little, but still very different from adults.

I didn't realise you had kids. Then you need to get the more confident cat.

I know people, including a neighbour, who have rescue cats. They were supposed to fine with older primary age children but the cats just ignore them.

caringcarer · 16/09/2024 17:00

I'd take both. These 2 know each other and are used to living together.

HarrietBond · 16/09/2024 17:04

Reugny · 16/09/2024 16:56

I didn't realise you had kids. Then you need to get the more confident cat.

I know people, including a neighbour, who have rescue cats. They were supposed to fine with older primary age children but the cats just ignore them.

Then they ARE fine with primary aged kids! It's about what the cats can tolerate.