Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
The litter tray

Join our community of cat lovers on the Mumsnet Cat forum for kitten advice and help with cat behaviour.

Original poster

Unwell cat and holiday plans - unsure what to do. Please be kind.

65 replies

ComingUpTrumps · 05/09/2024 19:27

I’ve booked a holiday with my parents for a couple of weeks’ time, which we’re all really looking forward to, as we haven’t been on holiday together for a while. The holiday is for just under a week.

My parents have an elderly cat, who we all adore and who is amazing, but she’s starting to show signs of her age - she’s 19. So far, she has been the picture of health (as far as we know). She goes for annual check-ups and vaccinations at the vet, and at her most recent one (March), they said she was doing really well for her age and she got a clean bill of health.

A couple of weeks ago, their cat was off her food, then she got tempted into eating again. Over the last couple of days, she went off her food again. She is already treated like a queen, but my parents are going above and beyond to tempt her (as they should be ❤️). My parents booked her into a cattery for during our holiday, before she started going off her food. We know they’ll be kind to her, but won’t fuss over her like we do, because understandably they won’t have time.

I’m basically wondering if we should cancel our holiday, in case our cat doesn’t make it through the next few weeks? Sorry - can’t find a better way to put this! I’m also going to go and see her as soon as our holiday is over, to spend time with her. I love her so much and I know she’s elderly, so the moment was always going to come when we’d have to say bye, but I just find it really hard to accept. We all love her so so much. Is it selfish to go on holiday when she is off her food?

OP posts:
PurpleCheese · 05/09/2024 19:42

Could you ask the cattery to give her the treats she loves? Surely they would, even if you offered to pay them a little more and provide the food/treats.

Original poster
ComingUpTrumps · 05/09/2024 19:43

Lockupyourbiscuits · 05/09/2024 19:42

our cat lived to 20
she went off her food the last few years on and off due to kidney failure and had medication from vets
she went a few times to the cattery who were brilliant in her last few years
they made a big fuss of her and she actually put on weight while she was there
also a good cattery will be able to spot signs of a problem and involve vet much sooner if needed
I would trust them more than a cat sitter

it depends on the cattery

This is a new cattery that she’s not been to before, but it looks comfy and they seem good. We’ll give them her favourite treats so they can pamper her ❤️❤️

OP posts:
Sethera · 05/09/2024 19:43

ComingUpTrumps · 05/09/2024 19:39

We are, yes.

For people saying we shouldn’t have booked a holiday because the cat is 19, we thought it was a calculated risk. We haven’t been on holiday together for years and both my parents are elderly. We have put our cat in a cattery many times and she has been okay. Re getting a pet sitter, I often pet sit for people, and I don’t think our cat would like to have a pet sitter, because she is shy and doesn’t take to new people easily.

When we booked the holiday, there was no reason at all to suggest my parents’ cat was unwell or struggling. This has really come out of the blue. Please try and be understanding if you can, as this has been difficult to deal with and if we’d known before booking that our cat was unwell, we’d never have booked it.

Show quote history

It's so hard. As this is only a short holiday and you trust the cattery, I would lean towards saying you should go, but in your shoes worrying about the cat would cast a blight over the holiday.

Would there be any option of two of you going and one of you staying with the cat, so at least the holiday isn't completely wasted?

Original poster
ComingUpTrumps · 05/09/2024 19:43

She’s also my cat. She lives with my parents but she is our family cat.

OP posts:
Original poster
ComingUpTrumps · 05/09/2024 19:44

Sethera · 05/09/2024 19:43

It's so hard. As this is only a short holiday and you trust the cattery, I would lean towards saying you should go, but in your shoes worrying about the cat would cast a blight over the holiday.

Would there be any option of two of you going and one of you staying with the cat, so at least the holiday isn't completely wasted?

Show quote history

That is such a good point and a possible option. I’ll suggest that to my parents. Thank you ❤️

OP posts:
Lockupyourbiscuits · 05/09/2024 19:49

l know you love your cat but I think if your parents are in good health you should take the opportunity to go on holiday

can you ask a trusted family member to check on the cat while you are away ?
speak to your parents - if they are happy with all eventualities then go
if they would be distraught if the cat passed while you are away then you will need to reconsider

cats are lovely but you don’t want to miss making memories with your parents

LoobyDoop2 · 05/09/2024 19:53

What an awful dilemma, I honestly don’t know what I’d do in that situation. I hope the vet can reassure you that it’s nothing, that your cat perks up in a couple of days and you can enjoy your holiday and then come home to a healthy but indignant cat.

AsYouWiiiiiiiiiiiiish · 05/09/2024 19:55

It is likely to be kidney issues based on what you have described and unfortunately they go downhill really fast.

If I'm honest, I would absolutely NOT be going.
Cats will starve themselves is upset or feeling unsettled and it doesn't sound like your cat is robust enough to withstand that.

I personally have literally left the airport just before boarding to go back to my sick cat and lost thousands of pounds on a holiday.

We are our pets whole world. Their source of love and comfort and they have no one else to turn to, like we do.

They deserve to be honoured in their last stages after a lifetime of companionship and loyalty.

DutchCowgirl · 05/09/2024 20:01

Do you have a cancellation insurance? I have one that will pay when pets are ill.
My oldest cat became 22 so it is easy to say “don’t travel abroad” but when would you start with this, when they are 17? Potentially 5 years!

Nw22 · 05/09/2024 20:02

I wouldn’t go l, just in case. I wouldn’t enjoy myself and couldn’t live with not being with them if they do die.
we have already agreed to not take any long distance holidays after our dog is 10 just in case he is unwell.

OhmygodDont · 05/09/2024 20:07
  1. Regularly on and off food. Maybe it’s just time to say goodbye.
Original poster
ComingUpTrumps · 05/09/2024 20:08

Thanks very much, everyone. I appreciate all your replies. We’ll wait and see what the blood test results are and then decide.

OP posts:
Original poster
ComingUpTrumps · 05/09/2024 20:09

DutchCowgirl · 05/09/2024 20:01

Do you have a cancellation insurance? I have one that will pay when pets are ill.
My oldest cat became 22 so it is easy to say “don’t travel abroad” but when would you start with this, when they are 17? Potentially 5 years!

This is exactly my feeling. Thank you. It is difficult to decide.

OP posts:
LadyMacbethWasMisunderstood · 05/09/2024 20:10

Oh OP I have been in your position twice with very elderly cats. On both occasions we arranged to take the cat with us as it was a holiday cottage in the UK and a bit of discussion sorted it out.

I would wait until the results tomorrow. But I have to say that I would not go abroad in these circumstances. I might consider a relative or friend moving into the house to cat sit if I really trusted them to do right by her. But I presume this is not an option for you or you would have said.

The most awful thing will be if she takes a down turn when you are away and needs to be PTS. That will be a horrible end for her and so upsetting for you either to prolong her suffering or not be there with her.

I do think people are being kind. Saying they would not go away in these circumstances is just offering you the advice you sought. You are not being unreasonable to want to go on holiday. But if DCat is still alive by the time you go, personally I could not bring myself to leave her.

aodirjjd · 05/09/2024 20:17

It’s hard to say before you’ve got results back from vets but another option to consider is pts before the holiday so you can plan her death and say goodbye and not wait for her to suddenly take a bad turn. I would do this if the blood results revealed the cat only likely had months to live. The cat has no concept that they might have lived a month longer and I’d really question how good that last month would actually be for her anyway.

Mebebecat · 05/09/2024 20:18

Do you or your parents have a trusted friend known to the cat who could move in? We did this and she updated us every day and actually successfully nursed the cat back to robust health.

Lavender14 · 05/09/2024 20:22

I think it's a difficult one op, at that age she could still come round and be OK or as you say things might be different. Have you used the cattery before? I know the one I use is excellent and they do go above and beyond. Some catteries will also specialise in taking on poorly cats or cats who require medication whereas others won't. I'd be thinking along the lines of a friend or family member who is prepared to mind her in your house for those days but that's a big ask for someone. I think get the vets advice on it? Hopefully the blood tests will give you some more clarity. It's a really difficult thing to navigate and I understand your worry.

MereDintofPandiculation · 05/09/2024 20:33

sunsetsandboardwalks · 05/09/2024 19:33

If I had a 19 year old cat I wouldn't be booking any holidays unless I could get myself home within an hour or so.

Seriously? What about when she’s 20, and 21, and 22? How many yearswillyou stay with 1 hour of home?

Newuser75 · 05/09/2024 20:38

I'd wait until you get the bloods back and then decide.
If nothing on the bloods I'd be tempted to go but if it's showing something up then maybe hang fire.
Good luck!!

sunsetsandboardwalks · 05/09/2024 20:41

MereDintofPandiculation · 05/09/2024 20:33

Seriously? What about when she’s 20, and 21, and 22? How many yearswillyou stay with 1 hour of home?

Show quote history

Yes, seriously. It's not forever and I just see it as part of owning an elderly pet.

I would leave the cat with DH or with family living in, but not alone or in a cattery - just to clarify.

DutchCowgirl · 05/09/2024 20:59

sunsetsandboardwalks · 05/09/2024 20:41

Yes, seriously. It's not forever and I just see it as part of owning an elderly pet.

I would leave the cat with DH or with family living in, but not alone or in a cattery - just to clarify.

Show quote history

well you say it’s not forever… but i couldn’t travel long distances for 8 years because of looking after my elderly parents. I don’t i think i can make the same sacrifice again for my cat, even though i love her very much.

When my 22 year old cat died I almost missed it, because i went to the office that day. She has been fragile and unstable, but that morning she was just walking around and watching the birds from her pillow in the window like she always did. When i came home that night she couldn’t get up anymore and I rushed her to a vet that put her to sleep. My partner never said her goodbye because it took him too long to get home. So no travelling is no guarantee.

CormorantStrikesBack · 05/09/2024 21:12

DutchCowgirl · 05/09/2024 20:01

Do you have a cancellation insurance? I have one that will pay when pets are ill.
My oldest cat became 22 so it is easy to say “don’t travel abroad” but when would you start with this, when they are 17? Potentially 5 years!

pet insurance might cover it, it did for a friend in this position recently

DinosaurMunch · 05/09/2024 21:28

I would consider putting her to sleep before you go. There's no point dragging it out for a 19 year old cat that's not eating.

Obviously depending on blood test results.

But don't feel bad to suggest euthanasia to the vet if they don't mention it first. If they suggest any kind of treatment make sure you have a good discussion about prognosis and what the future holds.

BirthdayRainbow · 05/09/2024 21:30

My cat was off her food. On day five of not eating as much as normal I asked at the vets if they needed to see her and they said yes. I lost her that day. You need to ask yourself if she has to be put to sleep while you're away would you be okay?

Coldfinch · 05/09/2024 21:43

ComingUpTrumps · 05/09/2024 19:43

This is a new cattery that she’s not been to before, but it looks comfy and they seem good. We’ll give them her favourite treats so they can pamper her ❤️❤️

Show quote history

So to recap: your parents are putting an elderly, shy cat who’s not keen on a pet sitter who nips into her home into a NEW CATTERY whilst she is unwell and shows signs of old age and possible underlying health issues.

YABU

I wouldn’t run the risk to increase the stress on the poor cat. Any cattery is stressful for cats - they’re not heard animals…how would you like it if you’re old and unwell and your family put you into a care home you’ve never been to before? I’d be devastated if I did this to a beloved animal and they passed away.

Swipe left for the next trending thread