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Join our community of cat lovers on the Mumsnet Cat forum for kitten advice and help with cat behaviour.

Original poster

I want my cat back

9 replies

HealthyEatingPlate · 09/11/2023 10:43

We adore our family cat who is now 6 years old and we've had since he was 9 weeks old. He comes and goes as he pleases, day or night. We are quite used to him disappearing for up to three days at a time in the summer. He never goes too far, he seems to favour other houses in the neighborhood that have more sunshine. However, it is extremely unusual for him not to be home pretty much all the time once the cold weather sets it. I was really surprised during the recent storm when we barely saw him. Right now he seems to come every two or three days for food, but leave immediately after.

Is there anything I can do to encourage him back? I feel someone else must be giving him something. Maybe not necessarily food, but something. Whilst I appreciate cats choose their humans, we love out cat, he's out pet, and we really want him back. He's chipped and has a tag with our address on it. I am looking to buy him a new bed, catnip, feliway... is there anything else you'd recommend?

OP posts:
CesareBorgia · 09/11/2023 10:45

If he's a heat seeker, get him a radiator bed.

Clarich007 · 09/11/2023 11:59

Oh I sympathise, my cat is the same.
We live in a University city and my cat loves students.The one thing we did was set up a WhatsApp message to ask them not to feed him.I also bought a collar with please do not feed.
He will never change, he's a rescued street cat who was living with the students but left behind when they moved on He obviously still remembers them😹

Clarich007 · 09/11/2023 12:00

P I don't like collars and he lost it anyway.

AnnaMagnani · 09/11/2023 12:06

I had firm words with my wandering cat and he is currently trying out being an indoor cat.

Actually going a lot better than expected and we get to see him which is great because he is lovely.

Curlewwoohoo · 09/11/2023 12:12

Next time he comes in could you shut him in for a few days or weeks?! Or would he hate it?

I wrote on a cheap collar saying I am diabetic, don't feed me, I live at xx address. Saw a difference straight away. Never did find out where he'd been going! Cat is actually diabetic though.

DRS1970 · 09/11/2023 12:24

If he likes the sun give him a cushion on a south facing window ledge if you have one. Failing that a radiator bed could work, as a PP has already said. You could try giving him a treat meal a couple of times a week to prove you are the humans he wants to own, such a fish - the smellier the better.

verdantverdure · 09/11/2023 12:30

My advice in these situations is pretty much always the same: Work out what he's missing at your house and try to provide it.

Has he got a cat flap so he can come home when he's cold, hungry or scared or does he have to wait in the cold and rain until you come home and let him in?

Is he lonely because you're all out most of the time? Is he cold? Bored? Needs more play, more attention? Is he going a long time between meals? Does he need to eat more or more often? Nicer food? Is it noisy and stressful in your house and he prefers a quieter life? Is the routine a bit all over the place and he prefers a predictable routine? Has your routine changed lately and he's not happy about it? Are there any other animals or new people in your house who might be bothering him?

He's still coming back every few days so he hasn't left you completely.

Jaffajiffy · 09/11/2023 12:33

Our cat did this. Popped in every few days and slowly got fatter. I tried the collar saying “please contact me if you are feeding this cat” but nothing happened. Eventually, the vet rang me saying she’d been taken there as “an abandoned kitten” and the vet had scanned her chip saying, “no, she’s 12 y old, and her owner lives opposite.” Having got the woman’s details, I could have a chat and asked if she wanted to adopt her. She said no thanks - she was not aware that cats sometimes flitted off 😜. She agreed not to feed her anymore and I kept her in for a few days so she would reconnect with us. 5y later we still have a very loving outdoor cat and we tend to warn new people on the street that our cat is likely to present as an “abandoned kitten”. Playing with her is fine (rather your carpets than mine), but feeding isn’t ok.

margotrose · 09/11/2023 12:47

The only way you can guarantee your cat stays on your property is to cat proof your garden or keep them indoors.

The risk with roaming cats is that they will go elsewhere.

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