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What can I do about stolen cat?

26 replies

GEK1983 · 24/10/2023 11:52

Hi all,

My cat went missing for about 3 weeks and at the weekend I got a message at midnight from someone on the next street to say they had found her and had been keeping her at theirs and feeding her (she has a collar on with my details and is microchipped so no excuse for not bringing her back sooner), they asked if they could keep her and I said no. Got cat back. As it was midnight when I got her I didn't have chance to speak to them so I wrote them a polite but firm letter to ask them not to feed her and not to let her stay as my children were missing her. I said if it did keep happening and she became ill then I'd send them my vet bills. I got a text saying I was rude and that I'm not to step foot on their property again and that he wouldn't feed her anymore but won't force her out if she comes in. I responded saying not to steal my cat and there will be no issues. He carried on texting me and I asked him to stop. He continued and then told me if my cat comes to his house again he will deal with her in his own way. He then called the police on me saying I'd harrassed him sending the letter! The officer saw the messages. Agreed with me and told him to stop and said he must not feed or take my cat in. The neighbour said he was worried if my cat goes missing that I will blame him. Anyway, cat loves going out so after a few days I've had to let her out as she scratches the doors and all sorts. Saw her on my way to the shop and she no longer has her collar on. I could be over thinking but this is first time it's ever come off and I'm wondering if it's been taken off out of spite or so they can claim she is theirs. Trouble is getting proof of course. Cat now wants nothing to do with us thanks to them. She follows me when I go out but hasn't come back again for food today. I feel like we've lost our cat permanently. I only got her at the beginning of the year. She's a rescue cat that was a stray before I got her. What do I do? She can't stay in, it's upsetting that they have made her want to go to them and the kids would be upset seeing her all the time if that's the case. I also don't want her living with someone who is that nasty either. Don't know what to do.

OP posts:
Toddlerteaplease · 24/10/2023 11:54

I think you should have just asked them not to feed her in future and left it at that, after they agreed to that.

HerMammy · 24/10/2023 12:00

I'd keep bringing her back in, keep her in as long as possible.

heldinadream · 24/10/2023 12:07

Is your cat microchipped? That's a start, because it establishes 'ownership'.

AwkwardPaws27 · 24/10/2023 12:16

Bring her home, keep her in and get a catio? (You can often pick up secondhand ones on Facebook Marketplace for much less than new).

Isheabastard · 24/10/2023 12:23

Micro chip her and start feeding her better food than he is. Give her something especially tasty when she returns.

Maybe only let her out during the day so she spends most nights at home.

Perhaps get some kind of cat camera so you can have proof of enticement and police can visit him again. Put it all over face book?

FormerlyPathologicallyHappy · 24/10/2023 14:57

She is microchipped it’s in the op.

Buy or build a catio to stop it.

margotrose · 24/10/2023 15:37

Unfortunately this is one of the risks of letting your cat out to roam. You can't control where they go or what happens to them when they're not on your property.

Unless you keep her on your property - either indoors or by using a catio/cat-proof fencing, then there's very little you can do to prevent her going elsewhere.

Labracadabra · 24/10/2023 16:01

heldinadream · 24/10/2023 12:07

Is your cat microchipped? That's a start, because it establishes 'ownership'.

It doesn't, sadly, although it can help (along with other evidence)

margotrose · 24/10/2023 16:32

heldinadream · 24/10/2023 12:07

Is your cat microchipped? That's a start, because it establishes 'ownership'.

Unfortunately microchips alone are not proof of ownership in the UK.

verdantverdure · 24/10/2023 16:37

Why do you think the cat prefers their house to yours?

caramond · 24/10/2023 16:38

What's the layout of your property/garden like? Is there easy access to the front if you only let her out in the back garden? Generally roaming the streets doesn't sound particularly safe anyway - a lot of cat rescues prefer cats primarily have access to a network of gardens at the back only. Of course if you're in a detached house without fences that won't be as easy to do...

GEK1983 · 24/10/2023 19:03

Probably shouldn't have got into it with him but equally he was trapping my cat and feeding her and so she wasn't coming home and then to top it off he became threatening with me so I lost my rag.

Take now for example, she still hasn't come home. She's probably there. My garden is a wrap around. The house she goes into backs onto my garden. I think she probably prefers theirs because they feed her human food all the time as they don't have their own cats but it's frustrating for myself and kids and it's honestly making me feel like not owning cats after this one. My last cat did the same thing, moved in with a couple across the street because they fed her human food and milk (which isn't even good for cats). I feel so stressed all the time. :(

OP posts:
margotrose · 24/10/2023 19:06

Can you cat-proof your garden to keep her on your property?

That's what we've done with our garden so our cats have free roam outside but can't go any further than our boundary.

Aylestone · 24/10/2023 19:13

heldinadream · 24/10/2023 12:07

Is your cat microchipped? That's a start, because it establishes 'ownership'.

Tbf the man hasn’t tried to claim ownership, he’s literally contacted the op and told her he’s got her cat. The issue is the cat has decided it’s moving into his and is not coming back to the op’s.
Op apart from cat proofing your garden, getting a catio or keeping it in, I don’t think there’s much you can do.

Roselilly36 · 24/10/2023 19:22

Has anything changed at home, that could have upset the cat? Unfortunately, cats can be like this. Sorry you are understandably upset OP Flowers

HerMammy · 24/10/2023 21:09

@GEK1983
You've been offered advice which you don't respond to, keep the cat or build a catio/ cat proof garden.

verdantverdure · 25/10/2023 05:11

You guys and your

"The cat seems to prefer being with other people...IMPRISON THE CAT!"

Surely the better approach is to work out what the cat likes about being over there and work to make them happier at home?

What would you do if it was your man?

Blame the Other Woman and trap him?!

Cats having feelings, preferences, opinions etc just like us.

@GEK1983 Hard as it is I think you need to do some hard thinking about why cats possibly prefer being elsewhere.

Are they moving to houses without kids? Without dogs? More attention? More play? More peace and quiet? Better food? More freedom because the other houses have cat flaps and they can come and go when they need to?

There will be reasons.

Find them.

Fix them.

Then you get to keep your cat.

FormerlyPathologicallyHappy · 25/10/2023 11:04

It’s not sustainable for the cat either, human food is low in taurine and long term it cat damage their hearts.

WandaWonder · 25/10/2023 11:07

The cat cant disappear if you keep it in apart from anything it could be killed

EmptyYoghurtPot · 25/10/2023 11:10

Cats can be very choosy about where they live. Do you have other cats? We had a rescue cat (I’m the locally acknowledged crazy cat lady so was literally dumped on the door). We had him neutered and sorted a minor medical issue, introduced him slowly to the rest of our mob and let him out after 8 weeks. About a month later he disappeared. Through the power of Facebook we tracked him down a couple of miles away, nowhere near his former home. Went and fetched him. Soon as we let him out he’d go back there. He obviously wanted to be the only cat in the household. The couple he’d gone to had no pets and were happy to keep him so we had his microchip details transferred and took round all his stuff. They send photos sometimes and say he rarely leaves their garden.
some cats just want to be the one and only.

ReadyForPumpkins · 25/10/2023 11:10

Cat chooses their human. You don't own the cat sadly. It's like a lover, you can't keep him if they don't want to stay.

Neverinamonthofsundays · 25/10/2023 12:04

Is it not a legal requirement to microchip pets where you are OP? My cat was stolen like this years ago but because you legally have to have pets chipped in Ireland I was able to prove ownership.

margotrose · 25/10/2023 15:03

Neverinamonthofsundays · 25/10/2023 12:04

Is it not a legal requirement to microchip pets where you are OP? My cat was stolen like this years ago but because you legally have to have pets chipped in Ireland I was able to prove ownership.

The cat is microchipped.

verdantverdure · 25/10/2023 22:29

Neverinamonthofsundays · 25/10/2023 12:04

Is it not a legal requirement to microchip pets where you are OP? My cat was stolen like this years ago but because you legally have to have pets chipped in Ireland I was able to prove ownership.

Not in the U.K. until June 2024.

DogInATent · 25/10/2023 22:39

Cats choose their own homes, and there's not much you can do about it other than enclose them in.

Many years ago we had a neighbour's cat move in with us. They accepted it, they knew where he was. He'd go back to theirs once in a while for a meal, and we were pretty sure he had another two homes he was an irregular at. The older he got, the less he left ours.

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