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Needy and noisy cat becoming huge problem

15 replies

neilyoungismyhero · 30/09/2023 16:35

Hi everyone, thoughts needed please.
We had two cats who did everything together; mooched about, sat on shed roofs, snuggled, slept, ate. A few months ago we lost the older boy who was 15 to cancer. He was fit and his normal self but the nose cancer was beginning to impact his breathing so we made the decision to let him go before it became too much for him. Our other cat who is a year or so younger has always been a tad needy but we've reached new levels now. Since we lost C. he literally has hardly stopped moaning/crying - day in day out, sometimes it sounds like he is actually screaming. He wakes up around 6am and starts moaning. He'll sometimes make his way up to us in bed and snuggle down but all the time moaning very loudly. When he gets comfy he stops and goes back to sleep. Sometimes if we just feed him he'll stop but often just recommences when he's stopped eating. If we put him out he cries and cries at the door- it's awful. The neighbours all hear him he's so loud.
I can't get another cat I'm afraid. We have a dog and they live amicably together so he always has company. Any suggestions please? I feel do sorry for him because the loss of C has obviously hugely impacted the little fella but it's driving us nuts, particularly my husband who can't seem to cope with it at all.

OP posts:
OnAFrolicOfMyOwn · 30/09/2023 16:39

Sorry for your loss of the older cat. You've said another cat isn't an option - why is that? It usually helps a grieving cat.

Toddlerteaplease · 30/09/2023 17:08

Was also going to suggest another cat.

Pudmyboy · 30/09/2023 17:14

we put him out he cries and cries at the door- it's awful. The neighbours all hear him he's so loud.
Do you put him out because you can't cope with him? My heart goes out to him as it sounds like he is grieving and struggling to cope: you mentioned he calms when snuggled with you in bed: does he need more cuddles right now?

purpleme12 · 30/09/2023 17:19

Oh god I'm sorry but this is really pulling on my heart.
Poor cat 😞

JewelleryCat · 30/09/2023 17:24

I echo the other posters because it does sound like he is grieving for his best mate. I know you have a dog but when you’ve done everything together, nothing else really compares. I think Pudmyboy is also right, he needs more cuddles and maybe more reassurance right now as well. He’s probably scared in his cat way and needs you and your DH

OnAFrolicOfMyOwn · 30/09/2023 17:25

You could try a Feliway diffuser and I would also get him checked at the vet in case there is something physically wrong.

But I think he needs a new pal.

HelpNeededBeforeIHaveABreakdown · 30/09/2023 17:31

Get a blood test to check his thyroid, they yowl for food if hyperthyroid.

margotrose · 30/09/2023 17:46

How old is he, and has he been vet-checked since he became an only?

It could be that your older cat dying is just a coincidence and your other cat is actually suffering from a medical condition - dementia (depending on age) and hyperthyroidism both spring to mind.

We had a cat who genuinely grieved when his sister died, even though he still had company, so getting a new friend may not be the cure-all that some posters seem to be suggesting.

Zapzep · 01/10/2023 05:02

I’m think you should get another cat if at all possible, Please give him a hug from me.

neilyoungismyhero · 01/10/2023 13:51

No offence but I've said another cat is not an option and it isn't.
He gets lots of fuss and attention- he was outside a while ago yowling - perfect word from a PP- the door was open and we were in sight. He eventually stopped and is now sat on the garden seat observing the neighbourhood.
He is super needy - the minute anyone in the house sits down he jumps up and snuggles into arms and necks. Everyone loves the 'cuteness ' but once he opens his mouth they change their minds. The thyroid suggestion is a good one thank you so will get that checked out.

OP posts:
AgnesX · 01/10/2023 13:57

This happened with our boy when his sibling had to be PTS. It took around a year for him to settle and he was loud, still is, especially if there's noone at home.

He's grieving, just like a human. It will get better but he needs lots of comfort and attention right now.

Freshair1 · 01/10/2023 14:10

Cats do better in pairs. Do the right thing by it.

margotrose · 01/10/2023 14:11

I don't know why everyone is suggesting another cat when OP has quite clearly said that's not possible Hmm

Getting another cat wouldn't necessarily solve the problem either - they may not get on, for starters, but even if they do, you can't just replace one companion with another and expect all the grief to go away.

We've always had multiple cats and we lost our 7yo suddenly in May, leaving behind her two brothers (3 and 8). The 8yo in particular still grieves her even though he has the company of his brother as well as another kitten to play with (who is now six months old).

Decorhate · 01/10/2023 14:14

Another thought… one of ours (15) has started yowling recently. We think he has gone deaf so can’t hear us call to him so things he has been left alone.

Cookerhood · 01/10/2023 14:14

I came on to say get his thyroid checked as well. Ours is always "talkative" but definitely got worse when he started with his thyroid issues.

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