Anxious rescue cat

[Gotobloodysleep]

We adopted a 6yr old rescue cat about 3 and half months ago. The centre said that she had arrived at there because one of the children she lived with developed an allergy.

They said she was fine with children. I have 2 boys, 9 & 11. So not small children but nevertheless still loud and, for a cat, still unpredictable. The dc have learnt about and are aware of cats behaviour and what she is telling us through her body language.

While she has somewhat settled she is still very anxious and will jump at the slightest thing. In addition to this she will sometimes swipe at the children if they walk past and she has been spooked by something. Due to this the dc are quite fearful of her.

She is mainly an indoor cat so far, but she does like to sit in the garden. I have given her lots of hiding places in the house and outside. She will play with a stick and feather toy.

She also doesn't really like to be stroked. There has been times where she will come and sit on my lap but then she will take a swipe at me. If she comes to sit near me I try to ignore her and just let her sit. But it does feel tense and she must sense that.

I have worked out that she gets aggressive if she sees any other cat. We live in a terraced street. Think long thin houses/gardens with a cobbled street out front. While we don't have any other animals there are plenty other cats around us and they all use the sheds at the back of the gardens as they travel through the area.

We have to be careful not to leave windows open as there is one cat who loves to visit any house that she can. We know her owner and spoken to him but there is not much we can do. The neighboured cats all seem to tolerate each other and they all sit on everyone's doorsteps, roofs etc.

We have a feliaway plugin and I have just started to give her the natural calming tablets but they don't seem to be making that much difference.

Looking for advice as to how to help her feel more comfortable. Is it just a matter of giving her time? At the moment it seems to be one step forward two steps back. I'm worried that she is just not happy here.

Picture for context

Sorry pictures not loading. I'll keep trying

I would guess that the child in her previous home may have been a bit "grabby", which has made your cat very anxious in general and very un-trusting.

3 and a half months isn't all that long for a rescue who may have trust issuers due to their past. Took me 6 months to touch the bolder of my first 2, and my latest addition has been home 7 months and still takes the odd swipe at my - I can literally only touch him when he's eating. Let her settle better in her own time - if she wants to sit on your lap then welcome her, but don't pick her up to put her there etc.

Oh and I use Zylkene as the natural calming remedy for mine. Powder in capsules that you scatter on their wet food. But it can take a weekl or two to kick in.

Thank you.

Yes, she will let us stroke her when she is eating but that is it.

It's the zylkene that we have been using but it has only been a few days so far.

I am hoping that now everyone is back at school that the quieter days at home will help her.

Time, time and more time…cats can take a very long time to trust esp if they have had a rough time before. It took two of mine ( ex feral girls) nearly three years to fully trust anyone… now they are cuddle bugs and my friends ( who have known them from I first got them) can happily stroke them etc… three months seems like a long time to you but won’t to her.

Time. Time is what it takes.

Our rescue took three months to come out of his hiding spot - it was probably 6-8 months before we could stroke him without getting hissed at, it without him attempting a bite.

We've had him six years now and he loves a cuddle and will even confidently come out to greet strangers - hang in there!

I'd say it's still early days.
Keep the pressure off and let your cat dictate the speed here.
Playing with your cat can help bonding and trust. Get your kids to offer treats without expecting fuss.
Be kind and consistent.
My DD read somewhere that stroking your cat with a damp toothbrush is nice for them (mimics grooming) and our cats do like it. Less risky with a swiper too.

Similar here, our rescue constantly hissing st kids

took about 6 months for him to sleep/relax next to me but a good couple of years to relax next to the kids and go for cuddles

they need patience, love and lots of ham slices!

I have a 7 Yr old cat who sounds a lot like yours, although she loves cuddles . Some cats just have very nervous character.

Feliway works for us and does making her go outside every day. She generally would stay indoors but she doesn't get enough brain stimulation without going outside, exploring, sniffing, watching.

Be alert for bladder issues as any setback causes instant bladder trouble and then she is even more upset.

Thank you for the replies.

@MathsIsFab yes we have discovered that ham slices seem to be an excellent treat. 😁

It's reassuring to know that others have had a similar experience. I was worried we were doing something wrong or that she really wasn't happy here.

Op how is your cat now? Am considering adopting a nervous rescue and would love to hear how your experience has been & if you have any tips?