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The litter tray

Join our community of cat lovers on the Mumsnet Cat forum for kitten advice and help with cat behaviour.

Original poster

Shy kitten

15 replies

Elektra1 · 04/08/2023 08:31

Brought home our new kitten yesterday. He's 11 weeks. First few hours he hid in the corner, then he settled into a cardboard box with a blanket. This morning I could see he'd eaten some of his food, and found him in the other corner of the living room behind a curtain.

He will let me stroke him gently but does not want to be picked up. He's now gone under the TV cabinet, from where I can't retrieve him.

I saw him with his mum before I got him, and he has been handled a lot by the lady I got him from and her little kids. Is it normal for him to be so wary of me, and what can I do to make him more comfortable? Should I keep trying to pick him up or will that stress him and create a negative association?

OP posts:
kcieciara · 04/08/2023 08:49

Aw, congrats on the new kitten! It's totally normal for a new kiten to be a bit shy and cautious in a new environment. It might take some time for him to feel at home and trust you. Be patient and give him space to explore. Try not to force picking him up if he's not comfortable with it yet, unless of course necessary. Instead, let him come to you when he's ready. Offer treats and playtime to build positive associations with you. Slowly, he'll warm up and feel more at ease :,)

Original poster
Elektra1 · 04/08/2023 14:51

Thanks. He has stayed under our TV unit all day so I have put his food and water bowls under there now and he's eating. I wonder how long it will be before he comes out.

OP posts:
FormerlyPathologicallyHappy · 04/08/2023 15:12

This is what they do, he’s tiny and away from mum for the first time so he’s scared.

You'll go out of your way to make him feel welcome and set up the cat slave dynamic we’re all used to.

GardeningIdiot · 04/08/2023 15:15

Lots of good advice here, @Elektra1:

icatcare.org/advice/helping-your-new-cat-or-kitten-settle-in/

Ibizafun · 04/08/2023 15:57

All totally normal. Playing with him with a teaser will encourage a bond. One of our cats just doesn't like being picked up.. they're all different. Give him a lot of time and patience.

WhatAPalaverer · 04/08/2023 15:59

One of ours hid under our bed for the first two weeks and still hides after the vet or the flea&wormer now. Perfectly normal, give it time.

mothercancer · 04/08/2023 16:00

Totally normal!

My monster was like this for weeks. I soon went back to wishing she would leave me alone for 5 seconds. I cant even go to the toilet without a spectator!

caringcarer · 04/08/2023 17:01

Your kitty his missing his cat mama cat. He's be fine in a week. Just keep talking to him gently. He will get used to your voice. Did you get given a blanket with his cat mama's scent on to help him settle?

WhatAPalaverer · 04/08/2023 19:23

Should have said- ours still only likes the humans she lives with, hides from anyone else but she’s the most lovely, affectionate, loving cat with the humans she likes!

Original poster
Elektra1 · 05/08/2023 06:53

So last night he came out from his hiding place and walked around the room, but still wouldn't let me get close. This morning he was behind the sofa and seemed more playful, let me stroke him etc. (had to reach down between sofa and wall to do so!). He still won't come out though.

OP posts:
Original poster
Elektra1 · 05/08/2023 06:54

caringcarer · 04/08/2023 17:01

Your kitty his missing his cat mama cat. He's be fine in a week. Just keep talking to him gently. He will get used to your voice. Did you get given a blanket with his cat mama's scent on to help him settle?

I asked the owner of cat's mum about this and she said it's better not to take something with smell of mum as if they have that, they keep looking for mum. I've no idea whether that's correct or not.

OP posts:
GardeningIdiot · 05/08/2023 07:44

Elektra1 · 05/08/2023 06:53

So last night he came out from his hiding place and walked around the room, but still wouldn't let me get close. This morning he was behind the sofa and seemed more playful, let me stroke him etc. (had to reach down between sofa and wall to do so!). He still won't come out though.

Have you actually was all the advice saying that this is totally normal? Let him settle in at his own pace.

I posted a guide to settling a kitten in that would take you 3 mins to read.

Original poster
Elektra1 · 05/08/2023 08:35

Thanks @GardeningIdiot, yes I have read the article you linked to, and many others.

OP posts:
cinnamonfrenchtoast · 05/08/2023 08:39

It's normal for domesticated kittens to be scared for a few days. You're a stranger to him and you've taken him from all he knows and plonked him alone in a new environment - he'll be terrified. He doesn't understand that you're nice like the previous people.

caringcarer · 05/08/2023 10:18

Elektra1 · 05/08/2023 06:54

I asked the owner of cat's mum about this and she said it's better not to take something with smell of mum as if they have that, they keep looking for mum. I've no idea whether that's correct or not.

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All breeders of dogs and cats do it.

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