When it's time

[DustbinDimberflake]

My cat JB is almost 18 and showing lots of signs that he's declining cognitively. My little shadow who has always thought I'm his mum (hand reared orphaned kitten) sometimes doesn't seem to know me or enjoy the things he always did before. He doesn't go outside anymore and if we take him out he doesn't seem to know where he is or what to do. He pees in all sorts of places. He zooms around and vocalises like he's been terrified. He jerks his head all the time like he's got something neurological going on. He doesn't often respond to his name anymore when it still had him running to me this time last year. He forgets he's been fed. He doesn't groom himself very often and he's lost loads of weight but the vet says they won't test him for disorders or illnesses as he gets too distressed for bloods and needs sedating, which is dangerous at his age. She says he's just a very old boy but "the time will come to say goodbye"

How will I know if it's "time"? My heart will shatter in my chest, because he's been with me all his life and half of mine, but I owe him a dignified and peaceful end if I can provide it for him. How will I know?

I’m so sorry you’re going through this OP.

It sounds like the time is coming, could you call your vet for some advice? It’s heartbreaking to have to make such a decision, but it’s the kindest thing to do for them and it’s better a week too early than a day too late x

I’m sorry you’re going through this. The fact that you are asking this question, suggests to me that it is time to let him go. It’s a heartbreaking decision to have to make.

If you feel his quality of life has deteriorated I think you should ask your vet for advice.
Although it's always very sad to have them PTS it's also the last kind thing we can do for our much loved animals.

I called the vet today about JB. She said because he's still eating and not vocalising like he's in pain, she doesn't want me to bring him in. He gets really distressed in the car or at the vet. She said she suspects arthritis is the reason he's so slow and can't sit all the way down, but he would be so distressed to have tablets forced down him that there's not much we can do. There's a liquid medication for pain relief but he can't have it because he reacted to it years ago. She said he's not crying or yowling in pain though and that the vocalising and darting around like mad is probably a sort of seizure type activity that is sometimes seen in very old cats when they're losing their cognitive function.

I said to her that I was scared I would not know when it was time and would leave him to suffer. She said "you'll know."
I am scared that I won't want to know and will fail him because I love him and want to keep him always

The vet is right, you will know. I looked at my girl once and knew.

You know your animal. You'll instinctively know when the point is reached that it's kinder to let him go.

It will hurt your heart, and that will let you know.