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Original poster

She's gone 😢 do I see her one last time?

36 replies

ShesGone · 19/02/2023 08:51

My beautiful, special girl couldn't take anymore and passed away earlier this morning at the veterinary clinic. She'd been battling an infection since having an op to fix a herniated bladder.

I'm absolutely heartbroken, she meant so much to me and I wasn't even there at the end.

I've got the option of seeing her later today with DH, but I'm not sure if I should? Part of me really wants to, to say goodbye and to say sorry for not being there with her at the end, but DH thinks it's best to remember her as she was.

I just don't know what to do and I'm sitting here in tears, my head swimming. Just interested to know what others would do/have done and if I'll regret not seeing her again?

Here she is, getting a lick from her big brother 😢

She's gone 😢 do I see her one last time?
OP posts:
Sunriseinwonderland · 19/02/2023 12:38

This is my little one at rest in the house for one night and then his grave. He got a proper send of and all the other cats attended. It was beautiful. The other cats would often lie on his grave in the garden afterwards. They knew where he was.

She's gone 😢 do I see her one last time?
She's gone 😢 do I see her one last time?
Sunriseinwonderland · 19/02/2023 12:41

He looked peaceful as though he was just sleeping.

Nannyfannybanny · 19/02/2023 12:41

Am so sorry for your loss. We had to have our little toy dog PTS 3 weeks ago, he would have been 18 in march. I have never stayed,we said our good-byes I kissed him,took his bed and blankets. Had the vet 25 years, knew she would be kind. I don't want to see their dead little bodies. My DH stayed with his little dog, she was 18,he had her almost half of his life....he was suicidal. He said he would never do it again. I never had a problem with strangers,I was nursing 40 plus years, considered it the last thing I could do for them, but couldn't bring myself to be with my late lovely DM

Doingmybest12 · 19/02/2023 12:49

I think if you are in two minds then go. You might think afterwards you'd rather not have but then there is learning there for next time or you might be at peace that you did.

Okunevo · 19/02/2023 12:52

@Sunriseinwonderland What a lovely send off for your dcat 💐. Mine just looked like she was sleeping as well except she looked even smaller than she was in life.

Catname · 19/02/2023 13:16

I’m sorry, it is heartbreaking to lose them.

One of my cats was put to sleep whilst under an anaesthetic to resolve a problem when it was found to be part of a much larger problem - the vet gave me the prognosis and we both felt it was kinder to take this course of action because of her age. It was during lockdown so I wasn’t able to go into the surgery but she was wrapped in a blanket and I cuddled her in the car to say my goodbyes which gave me some peace as I’d dropped her off in the morning fully expecting her to be back by teatime.

Whatever you decide to do will be right for you Flowers

LilLilLi · 20/02/2023 11:01

It’s such a hard decision and there is no wrong answer.

I lost my girl in January, she was only 11 months old. Her breathing was rapid so we went to the emergency vets, they were waiting for us to arrive and took her from me as soon as I walked in so I didn’t get to give her a stroke or a hug before she went for treatment.

She passed away a few hours later, and I chose to see her the next day to say goodbye. I stroked her and kissed her head and apologised for not being there at the end, it was sad but I’m glad I did it.

Original poster
ShesGone · 20/02/2023 12:52

We buried her this morning.

I chose not to see her face, but the vet wrapped her up in her favourite blanket and I gave her a cuddle and told her how much I loved her and how sorry I was for not being there at the end.

Thank you, everyone, for your kind words at this time. I'm just sorry we (all) have to go through this, but I keep reminding myself this is the price you pay for absolute love and joy.

Thank you again for sharing your experiences, love to all who has had to go through this 💕💐

OP posts:
Sunshineparasol · 20/02/2023 13:01

It's entirely personal.

I had my beloved boy cat PTS, it was awful. I took him home afterwards to bury.

I personally found it soothing to stroke him, tell him I loved him and a few other private words and brush him gently (he was longhaired so it was something I did regularly) one last time, and wrap him up comfortably. He looked like he was asleep. I wanted to be the last person to see him and to take care of him and make sure everything was just right, the last act of love and care I could do for him. It meant a lot to me although obviously it was very very sad.

Sunshineparasol · 20/02/2023 13:04

I'm sorry, cross posted.

I think the fact you were able to see her one last time will be a comfort to you in the days ahead, at least I know it was for me. Flowers Be kind to yourself over the next few weeks. The pain can really come and go. I learned to just roll with it and had more than a few good sobs by myself privately.

xx

PushkaMcgee · 20/02/2023 20:09

I'm so sorry for your loss, as a pp said, be kind to yourself, sending a big hug.

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