Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
The litter tray

Join our community of cat lovers on the Mumsnet Cat forum for kitten advice and help with cat behaviour.

Original poster

Anxious about leaving my 3 month old kitten alone.

49 replies

Twentywisteria · 13/02/2023 21:14

I got a kitten from a reliable breeder last Thursday. It's just me at home and I normally work Mon-Thurs 9-5, but have taken the week off to settle him in.

80% of the time I'm home, he follows me around. If he's asleep and I move, he's awake and following me.

I've left the home 1-2 hours per day and he doesn't seem distressed when I return. However he "lost" me in the flat briefly earlier and was crying plaintively, sounding really upset.

How do I go to work next week without feeling so guilty? 😕

OP posts:
Mymblesdaughter · 13/02/2023 21:19

I got 2 kittens for this very reason they are brother and sister. They keep each other company and play together when we are busy or at work.

Luana1 · 13/02/2023 21:19

Probably not what you want to hear but we didn't leave our kitten alone for more that a couple of hours for a month after we got him, a week is quite a short time to settle in, but not everyone has the luxury of having two people who can alternate working from home like we did.

When we did go out and sometimes still do is put calming music on for him. If you go on YouTube and search 'music for cats no ads' that one seems to work well.

Original poster
Twentywisteria · 13/02/2023 21:24

Mymblesdaughter · 13/02/2023 21:19

I got 2 kittens for this very reason they are brother and sister. They keep each other company and play together when we are busy or at work.

I decided against two because the two siblings I had as a child fought a lot and argued over territory when they grew up. The younger female cat really came out of her shell when he died and was like a new cat.

OP posts:
Floralnomad · 13/02/2023 21:24

You should have got 2 , it’s a long day on your own , can you get a cat sitter to come and visit during the day .

Original poster
Twentywisteria · 13/02/2023 21:25

Luana1 · 13/02/2023 21:19

Probably not what you want to hear but we didn't leave our kitten alone for more that a couple of hours for a month after we got him, a week is quite a short time to settle in, but not everyone has the luxury of having two people who can alternate working from home like we did.

When we did go out and sometimes still do is put calming music on for him. If you go on YouTube and search 'music for cats no ads' that one seems to work well.

Thanks good tips. Can't take a month off due to the nature of my job. The breeders are obsessed with their cats and said my living/working arrangements would be totally fine. Just hard when he's here.

He settled in from day 1, no period of shyness or anything and displays loads of really contented behavior.

OP posts:
Original poster
Twentywisteria · 13/02/2023 21:26

Floralnomad · 13/02/2023 21:24

You should have got 2 , it’s a long day on your own , can you get a cat sitter to come and visit during the day .

As stated above, decided against 2 due to past experience.

OP posts:
SoftSheen · 13/02/2023 21:30

I don't think you should leave a 12 week old kitten alone for a whole working day. They need a lot of care and companionship at that age, and also need supervision in case they get themselves into trouble. You need to get a cat sitter, or at the very least someone to pop in every 2-3 hours.

KangarooKenny · 13/02/2023 21:33

I left mine as I had to go to work, they were fine

BurbageBrook · 13/02/2023 21:40

When I was in this situation I asked a family member to pop in daily at lunchtime until my two kittens were a bit bigger. If you don't have such a luxury of local support as I was lucky to have then I think a lunchtime catsitter for a few weeks until he's a bit bigger would be kind.

Orangesare · 13/02/2023 21:44

Just make sure wherever he can go is kitten proof.
You could get a timer food bowl and a variety of cardboard boxes

Twatalert · 13/02/2023 21:45

Leave him in one room with all his stuff to begin with so he won't feel lost. You could ask a neighbour or get a local cat sitter (catinaflat) to pop in once while you are out just to ease him in.

I know you feel terrible but he'll probably sleep all day. Make sure you schedule some playtime before and after work to wear him out. I get up earlier just to entertain my cat before work. Stick to the same routine every day so he knows what you are up to.

Yarnosaura · 13/02/2023 21:46

He'll probably be fine, though it's less than ideal, but you need to think about how you can make sure he's safe when you're not there and how to feed him during the day. An adult rescue would have been a much better match for your circumstances (as well as a more ethical choice).

Twatalert · 13/02/2023 21:50

At his age you can see if he takes to dry food while you are out. I remember mine constantly wanting food as he was growing. He ate more than he eats now as an adult. But do make sure you get him a water fountain or add water to his wet food to compensate. The weather is still OK to leave out wet food for a few hours. Summer will be totally different though.

Where is the photo?

oneleggedspider · 13/02/2023 22:04

I have two 4 month old kittens, and they will both cry if they know I'm in the house and they can't find me, but when I go out they just curl up and go to sleep. I got a baby camera so I can watch them from work and they barely move until I get home. He'll be fine. Make sure there's a few toys, comfy bed and a litter tray and give him lots of attention when you get home.

ISaidDontLickTheBin · 13/02/2023 22:16

Twatalert · 13/02/2023 21:45

Leave him in one room with all his stuff to begin with so he won't feel lost. You could ask a neighbour or get a local cat sitter (catinaflat) to pop in once while you are out just to ease him in.

I know you feel terrible but he'll probably sleep all day. Make sure you schedule some playtime before and after work to wear him out. I get up earlier just to entertain my cat before work. Stick to the same routine every day so he knows what you are up to.

Agree with leaving him on a relatively small space while you were out. Give him a good play session before you go, then he will sleep for a while.

Don't feel guilty for not getting 2 kittens - we got one and he was fine.

Sunriseinwonderland · 13/02/2023 22:28

I wouldn't get just one kitten, they get very distressed being left alone for hours.
I have a kitten and an old cat and the old cat has taken on the mother role so kitten is fine when I go to work.
If a cat is going to be alone all day you really need to forget about kittens and get an older cat or two kittens.
He's gone from having a loving mum and lots of siblings to being all alone and they can develop all kinds of problems from this, pica, licking all their fur off and so on.
You need to get a cat suitable for your circumstances.

Original poster
Twentywisteria · 14/02/2023 10:00

Thanks for the good advice. Those telling me to get a rescue or get two.. that ship has sailed so no use trying to stick the boot in about it.

OP posts:
Original poster
Twentywisteria · 14/02/2023 10:01

Sunriseinwonderland · 13/02/2023 22:28

I wouldn't get just one kitten, they get very distressed being left alone for hours.
I have a kitten and an old cat and the old cat has taken on the mother role so kitten is fine when I go to work.
If a cat is going to be alone all day you really need to forget about kittens and get an older cat or two kittens.
He's gone from having a loving mum and lots of siblings to being all alone and they can develop all kinds of problems from this, pica, licking all their fur off and so on.
You need to get a cat suitable for your circumstances.

I'll just pop in my time machine then?

OP posts:
coffeecupsandwaxmelts · 14/02/2023 10:17

He'll be fine.

We had a solo kitten and she was left on her own from the day after we brought her home.

She's six now and perfectly happy and well-adjusted. She never had any behavioural problems from being alone either.

We made sure she had two litter trays, dry food and water and blocked off any spaces like the chimney so she couldn't get into mischief.

Please don't worry - cats are independent little things and don't need our company in the way dogs do!

Original poster
Twentywisteria · 14/02/2023 10:50

coffeecupsandwaxmelts · 14/02/2023 10:17

He'll be fine.

We had a solo kitten and she was left on her own from the day after we brought her home.

She's six now and perfectly happy and well-adjusted. She never had any behavioural problems from being alone either.

We made sure she had two litter trays, dry food and water and blocked off any spaces like the chimney so she couldn't get into mischief.

Please don't worry - cats are independent little things and don't need our company in the way dogs do!

Thank you!

OP posts:
ChinoiserieNerd · 14/02/2023 17:15

Twentywisteria · 14/02/2023 10:00

Thanks for the good advice. Those telling me to get a rescue or get two.. that ship has sailed so no use trying to stick the boot in about it.

Well, not really. You could easily still get a second kitten - it doesn't have to be an actual sibling, any other cat of a similar age will make your kitten just as happy. I don't think it's fair to have just one when you spend that much time out of the house, but it sounds like you've already made up your mind.

Ludo19 · 14/02/2023 18:44

Come on OP pay the cat tax where is the photo of your new family member?

coffeecupsandwaxmelts · 14/02/2023 18:53

I don't think it's fair to have just one when you spend that much time out of the house, but it sounds like you've already made up your mind.

It's also not fair to try and guilt the OP into get a second when you don't know her circumstances 🤷🏻‍♀️

Original poster
Twentywisteria · 14/02/2023 19:29

Ludo19 · 14/02/2023 18:44

Come on OP pay the cat tax where is the photo of your new family member?

My very stressed/traumatised/neglected kitten (attached).

Anxious about leaving my 3 month old kitten alone.
OP posts:
Original poster
Twentywisteria · 14/02/2023 19:29

Another

Anxious about leaving my 3 month old kitten alone.
OP posts: