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Original poster

A cat has adopted us... what next

51 replies

Ohsoverytired11 · 11/01/2023 23:38

Hoping for some advice with this. We have had an absolutely gorgeous ginger Tom cat visiting us for about 8 weeks. He turned up on our street and wouldn't leave and nobody knew him. He then chose my house as home and started showing up all the time. He then started losing weight and there was no response when we searched for his owner via facebook and using paper collars so we took him to the vets. The vet confirmed that he was microchipped and the owner was collecting him, and they would advise them to keep him in for a few days as he has decided to stray. Well, 4 hours later and he was back! Since then he hasn't left and seemingly adopted my house as his home. I have tried to contact his owners through Facebook, posters, paper collars and letting him out at night (when not too cold) to try and get in touch with them. He comes back the next morning with the paper collar still attached!
We know his owner must be local with how quickly he came back. He definitely has not been to any other home for about a week now as he comes back with his paper collar still attached and hungry, and during the day he hangs around my house and driveway like the Lord of the Manor!
I'm guessing this means that he has adopted us and we are happy to let him stay, but where do we stand in terms of the owner? No one has been looking for him but he is chipped and they collected him from the vets. I don't know what more we can do to try and find them. Surely though as soon as we take him to a vets they will want to speak to who he is registered to and not us?
I don't want to keep having to put him out at night to encourage him to go home, I worry about him! In an ideal world I would like the owners or someone who knows him to get in touch but it doesn't look like that is going to happen. It's a very strange situation to us.

OP posts:
Original poster
Ohsoverytired11 · 12/01/2023 08:58

If you had contact details for where your cat is going to and knew someone had been trying to get in touch with you about him, wouldn't you get in touch and say something to the effect of "he's fine, he's fed, back off". That's what I would have done straight after collecting him from the vet and been given contact details. If we got that message we would leave him. we didnt feed him straight away or were enticing him into our homes with food, this has progressed after weeks of him refusing to go anywhere else and losing weight which continued after the vet visit. We hadn't fed him before the point of taking him to the vet. At that point we thought he had got lost or trapped out of where he was meant to be if someone was away. I'm calling the vet after 9 anyway when the reception opens and hopefully they can get in touch.

OP posts:
Thesonglastslonger · 12/01/2023 09:06

Legally the cat is property and belongs to his owner, in the same way as you can’t keep someone’s racehorse or sheep just because it likes you better than it’s owner. If you keep it without at least trying to return it, then that is theft I’m afraid.

Feed the cat, but tell the vet what has happened. I wouldn’t feel any obligation to take the cat there, suggest the vet tells the owner where they can collect it. Maybe ask the vet to ask the owner if they would like you to adopt it, say you’re happy either way but need to know. If no reply, keep it as abandoned.

Be aware that you’re in a tricky position re. fleas. You can’t give it a flea treatment because you don’t know if it’s already been done, and it’s important not to overdose cats. But if you leave it untreated then eventually he will bring fleas in (they drop of foxes and hop around gardens until a cat walks by).

BloodAndFire · 12/01/2023 09:11

It's always rubbish when someone says a cat has adopted them.

A relative of mine claimed a cat had adopted them. She had 'dreamies' written on her shopping list 😒

Loads of cats try to come into my house and garden. I wish they'd fuck off. I'm certainly not inviting them into my house, feeding them, taking them to the vets etc.

Strangely enough this 'oh he just adopted me teehee' thing hasn't happened to me.

Roselilly36 · 12/01/2023 09:19

One of our cats did this, also ginger but a spayed female. Moved in with a family up the road, we were worried sick when she was missing, did everything to find her. She stayed with them, she died a few months later, and they had the bloody nerve to ask us if we wanted her back.

Florissant · 12/01/2023 13:08

BloodAndFire · 12/01/2023 09:11

It's always rubbish when someone says a cat has adopted them.

A relative of mine claimed a cat had adopted them. She had 'dreamies' written on her shopping list 😒

Loads of cats try to come into my house and garden. I wish they'd fuck off. I'm certainly not inviting them into my house, feeding them, taking them to the vets etc.

Strangely enough this 'oh he just adopted me teehee' thing hasn't happened to me.

No, actually, it isn't surprising given the tone of your post.

OP, I hope you can get in touch with Ginger Cat's owners to ask permission to adopt him.

In the summer of 2021, the rescue cat I'd had for about seven months escaped out an open window and went to live with a family around the corner. He was a former stray and I wanted him to be an indoor cat to keep him safe; he had other ideas.

The people he went to live with (they have an enormous garden, two other cats of the same age and a cat flap) were happy to adopt him. He is now a much-loved member of their family.

JauntyJinty · 12/01/2023 13:22

Never feed anyone else animal without their permission!

Maybe this cat was over weight from being fed at loads of houses and the "losing weight" was a deliberate effort by the genuine owners? Maybe it has some kind of special diet and you're doing more harm than good?

We've been on the other side of this - someone decided that our Cat "had chosen them" was malnourished and they should rescue the poor dear. He is fed wet food 3 times a day and has dry food always available - He's just a greedy fucker and will always beg for food!

OP you need to contact the vet and ask them to pass on your details so the real owners can let you know what they want you to do if it hsows up again. It will probably be "stop feeding him and letting him in your house!"

Again for the people at the back - Never feed anyone else animal without their permission!

Original poster
Ohsoverytired11 · 12/01/2023 13:31

I have an update. The daughter of the owner has got in touch following the vet phone call. In summary, his owner has sadly been struggling due to a sudden health deterioration and their daughter has realised that they have been forgetting about the cat which has led him to go elsewhere. The daughter wants to take over the care of him now and has been to fetch him. She has our details and we have hers. If he comes back around the street she is going to come over and fetch him for meal times. She didnt know about the vet visit and isn't sure how her relative got him home. But we are pleased it is resolved and its lovely to know his name if and when he wants to say hi.

Thank you to the people who advised asking the vet to pass on a message.

OP posts:
justasking111 · 12/01/2023 13:44

Wonderful but unless she keeps him in for a month, builds a bond with him. He'll be back

Sparklingbrook · 12/01/2023 14:12

That's good news as @justasking111 says, he needs to be under house arrest for a good month to get used to his new home. I assume the new owner (the daughter) also lives close to you.

Are you a little bit disappointed? It would be understandable.

RomeoOscarXrayIndigoEcho · 12/01/2023 15:14

You've done the right thing and the cat sounds loved and wanted.

You can be an extra pair of eyes and ears for the cat.

oakleaffy · 12/01/2023 15:19

Mum has has had and has several cats that aren’t hers, and I was asked to house sit in school hols to feed him!
Cats are six dinner Sids ( Read that book!)
they go where they like.
If he is a Tom, I’d get him neutered, a fast and easy op that takes less than a minute with a male cat.

oakleaffy · 12/01/2023 15:26

@BloodAndFire
Dreamies are the Crack Cocaine of cat treats.
Ditto 🦐 prawns.

DRS1970 · 12/01/2023 15:27

It isn't your cat, no matter what you think. If you have concerns for his wellbeing report it to the RSPCA.

BloodAndFire · 12/01/2023 15:28

oakleaffy · 12/01/2023 15:26

@BloodAndFire
Dreamies are the Crack Cocaine of cat treats.
Ditto 🦐 prawns.

I know! That's what I meant. Her "oh this cat just keeps turning up and annoying me" was unconvincing even before i realised she was buying cat crack 😁

Ursuala · 12/01/2023 15:30

Ohsoverytired11 · 12/01/2023 01:09

Thank you for the advice about asking the vet to pass a message on. We gave our contact details and those of a neighbour to pass on at the time but I didn't know they would pass a message on if the cat returned. I will do this in the morning.

But the cat hasn’t “returned” to the owner

Essentially he’s missing again so I can’t understand why wouldn’t go straight back to the vet

Ursuala · 12/01/2023 15:32

Ohsoverytired11 · 12/01/2023 13:31

I have an update. The daughter of the owner has got in touch following the vet phone call. In summary, his owner has sadly been struggling due to a sudden health deterioration and their daughter has realised that they have been forgetting about the cat which has led him to go elsewhere. The daughter wants to take over the care of him now and has been to fetch him. She has our details and we have hers. If he comes back around the street she is going to come over and fetch him for meal times. She didnt know about the vet visit and isn't sure how her relative got him home. But we are pleased it is resolved and its lovely to know his name if and when he wants to say hi.

Thank you to the people who advised asking the vet to pass on a message.

nice resolution

Emmamoo89 · 12/01/2023 15:54

Stop feeding him. That's why he keeps coming back. You have no right to just take him when he has owners.

justasking111 · 12/01/2023 16:05

Emmamoo89 · 12/01/2023 15:54

Stop feeding him. That's why he keeps coming back. You have no right to just take him when he has owners.

Well he might now fingers crossed but the original owners were forgetting to feed him so he was starving . Is this okay with you?

justasking111 · 12/01/2023 16:06

Ursuala · 12/01/2023 15:30

But the cat hasn’t “returned” to the owner

Essentially he’s missing again so I can’t understand why wouldn’t go straight back to the vet

Show quote history

Read the Bloody update 🙄

Florissant · 12/01/2023 16:45

Thanks for the update, OP. I'm glad to hear that things are in hand.

Beamur · 12/01/2023 16:56

Good update. Sounds like you did do the right thing in feeding him as he wasn't being looked after.
Personally I would always err on the side of feeding a cat that seems hungry while I try and track down the owner.
Hopefully this chap will now be taken care of.

Luckyducker · 12/01/2023 17:04

It's called cat stealing. Plenty of people do it. They should not.

Theunamedcat · 12/01/2023 22:02

Good update fingers crossed for the little cat

justasking111 · 12/01/2023 22:41

@Ohsoverytired11 you're so kind, well done.

Pudmyboy · 14/01/2023 11:21

@Ohsoverytired11 you are very caring and did everything right, that ginger boy recognised kindness and picked the perfect people to board with till his home circumstances were sorted out. I am sorry for the original owner and glad he has at least two places where he will be looked after in future

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