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Join our community of cat lovers on the Mumsnet Cat forum for kitten advice and help with cat behaviour.

Original poster

Mother cat growling/hissing at teenage kitten

15 replies

LaMigraine · 31/12/2022 09:44

We have just adopted a pair of beautiful rescue cats, mother is about 18 months, son is about 6 months (exact ages unknown as they were dumped in a box outside a vets). They are both extremely affectionate to us and quite confident - we’ve only had them 2 days but they’re happily roaming round the house. The trouble is, mum cannot stand her son. Every time he goes near her she growls and sometimes hisses at him, and he is clearly scared of her.

Initially I thought she was growling at me petting him and was being protective, but quickly realised it was because he was getting attention from me and she didn’t like it. I know it’s very early days but I’m wondering what we can do to help the situation. We are giving her lots of attention and love to try and reassure her, but I’m a bit worried this may be a long term problem.

They were in a foster home for a couple of weeks before we got them but were given no indication that this was a problem there. There were two other kittens with them (children/siblings of our cats) so the dynamic was different there, so maybe the problem only began when we brought just the two of them home. It’s hard to know. What I do know is that it’s been a really difficult year for our family, and getting cats was supposed to be a nice thing, but it’s turning out to be hugely stressful!

OP posts:
Namechangedforspooky · 31/12/2022 09:46

i think I would try some feliway and see if that helps. Otherwise it’s early days and might just need for them to settle. Good luck!

SummerSazz · 31/12/2022 09:52

My rescue cat came from slightly similar circumstances. Mum (my cat) had a litter and they kept a boy. All I know is that she then went missing for a number of weeks (months?) and when she rocked back up the son had become dominant. They re-homed mum as she was the one who had gone awol.

Original poster
LaMigraine · 31/12/2022 10:10

SummerSazz · 31/12/2022 09:52

My rescue cat came from slightly similar circumstances. Mum (my cat) had a litter and they kept a boy. All I know is that she then went missing for a number of weeks (months?) and when she rocked back up the son had become dominant. They re-homed mum as she was the one who had gone awol.

See, this is what I’m worried about. Obviously we will keep them in for 8 weeks anyway, but I’m worried that as soon as we let them out, one of them will disappear. And if it’s the boy, who is so, so sweet, I’ll always resent his mum. Who is lovely when he’s not near, but I already feel
protective of him and he’s only little. Dammit, this was supposed to be a nice thing!

OP posts:
Original poster
LaMigraine · 31/12/2022 10:11

I will get some Feliway pronto, though - thanks @Namechangedforspooky

OP posts:
Notanotherusername4321 · 31/12/2022 10:13

This is part of the risk with more than one cat. Sometimes they just don’t get on.

have you got a big enough territory for them both? Hopefully it’s just initial establishing of boundaries, but make sure they can get away from each other, at least 3 litter trays, feed separately etc.

eurochick · 31/12/2022 10:15

Presumably they have both been neutered?

RedPandaFluff · 31/12/2022 10:17

Ahh that does sound stressful, @LaMigraine - agree with @Notanotherusername4321 - make sure there are lots of resources (in terms of feeding bowls and litter trays) so they don't feel they are competing for anything, Feliway/Feline Friends, and hopefully in time they'll mellow.

Just to reassure you - it's not the end of the world if they don't start snuggling up together etc. We have two cats who hated each other initially but now have learned to tolerate each other and it's pretty harmonious.

Courgeon · 31/12/2022 10:18

A colleague has a mother cat with her children all living together and the mum just didn't want to be around the children after a point and now keeps going missing. I wonder if like swans it's some kind of evolutionary thing to reject them/separate from them?

Catoneverychair · 31/12/2022 10:19

Have they both been neutered? It's natural in a way, they'll probably settle after a while.

Original poster
LaMigraine · 31/12/2022 10:22

Yep, they have both been neutered. In terms of feeding bowls, litter trays etc - how will they know which ones to use? Where should they be put etc? Currently both bowls and trays are in our sitting room where we put them for the first day. Eventually they’ll both go in the kitchen but is it enough to just have them in separate spots? And how do I stop him eating her food?

Sorry for the apparent cluelessness - we’ve had a single cat before, but this is our first time with two.

OP posts:
SummerSazz · 31/12/2022 10:31

LaMigraine · 31/12/2022 10:22

Yep, they have both been neutered. In terms of feeding bowls, litter trays etc - how will they know which ones to use? Where should they be put etc? Currently both bowls and trays are in our sitting room where we put them for the first day. Eventually they’ll both go in the kitchen but is it enough to just have them in separate spots? And how do I stop him eating her food?

Sorry for the apparent cluelessness - we’ve had a single cat before, but this is our first time with two.

I now have another cat (came as a kitten). Original mum cat is now 15 and doesn't really tolerate other animals (we have a dog now too). However her safe space is the utility surface and she has a litter tray, bed and food. DKitten who is DD's has a litter tray and food in her bedroom. Kitten knows not to try and eat DCat's food (although it's inhaled in minutes!). DDog keeps out of her way as she knows she'll get a smack on the face if she comes too close.

ThankGodImAnAtheist · 31/12/2022 11:04

Just to pick up on one of your questions … you can buy auto cat feeders that are opened by the cat’s microchip … they could each have their own food bowl which is safe from the other. They are also handy if you are trying to stop a dog wolfing down the cat’s food. Good luck !

RedPandaFluff · 31/12/2022 16:41

We use dried food from a gravity-dispenser so there's always food available from three separate sources dotted around the house. It's not ideal but it means that they have food/water available easily wherever they happen to be lurking.

Fluffycloudland77 · 01/01/2023 01:21

I think this is normal though, cats don’t keep their kittens they encourage them to move on by attacking them.

Sunshineandrainbow · 01/01/2023 01:28

Mine did exactly this, I had mother and kitten, when kitten was about 20 weeks old she started hissing at him and wouldn't lay with him.
I read online that is not normal for them to stay together and its the mothers way of telling kitten to leave home.

You could try feli way plug in

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