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Join our community of cat lovers on the Mumsnet Cat forum for kitten advice and help with cat behaviour.

Original poster

Should I get a new Kitten?

32 replies

simplefree · 27/12/2022 12:34

I got my beautiful cat in 2020 as a kitten - I was living in the ground floor and raised him to go out to the patio, shared garden and further - it was a very green neighbourhood and lovely people around who loved him. He loved climbing on trees, chasing bees, lying on the grass, exploring, playing with other cats and visiting the neighbours.

Due to a change of circumstances I had to move out immediately (long story) and ended up on a flat on the 9th floor. My cat had a hard time adapting and my heart broke seeing him looking out on the balcony and the window, walking around looking for something interesting to do. During the heat wave I left one of the windows opened slightly wider and found him standing on the window ledge outside - 9th floor! Luckily I scooped him back in but was terrified and very sad.

I then found 2 ladies who were happy to re-home him. Lady 1 had a sudden health issue when we were talking about details so I ended up going with Lady 2...she loved him a lot and had an awesome garden for him but her husband didn't adapt having a cat at home for whatever reason and after 2 months she said she wanted to re-home him. I told her that I wanted him back and meanwhile got in touch with Lady 1 and explained the situation and she was happy to have him. So Lady 2 took him to Lady 1 who already had a cat and gave it a good go for about 2-3 weeks but the cats didn't get along very well and her neighbour's cat was getting involved too so she asked me to get him back.

So he came home and I was so happy! He acted like he never left. But I still worry that he is sad and bored and I am not giving him a good life. He doesn't play with toys anymore so I don't know what to do. People say that I am projecting and he has no feelings and is happy just to be around from one room to another, eat and sleep. I wish I could believe.

I ended up signing him up to a rescue charity under the condition that he is adopted by a cat lover with outside space and in a calm household - he is on the waiting list. But another idea would be to get a young kitten who is not territorial yet to keep him company and give him feline friendship. I think it could work. And the new cat will not suffer from not being outdoors because it would not be part of his life experience anyway.

I am also trying to move back to a ground floor home but it is difficult. I am a council tenant and my only chance is by exchanging. People hate high rising blocks and are crazy for ground floor. I don't mind and the only reason I want to move again is to benefit my cat.

What do you think?

OP posts:
MyBooksAndMyCats · 27/12/2022 12:37

The first thing I'd do is cat proof the balcony. It's easy enough with mesh wire. Or take him out on the balcony with a cat Leash.

But yes I'd get a kitten as a friend if you intend on having him as a house cat. I have two house cats and a third cat who goes out. My first one used to go out but something happened and she's now terrified to go outside and she's a lot happier having a friend whose always in with her.

Bestcatmum · 27/12/2022 12:40

You can get cat proofing mesh to go over windows and balconies, it's not difficult to fix.
I got a kitten for my 12 year old cat and they have a lovely time chasing each other and playing. I find they are better off with the same sex.

IToldYouAmillionTimesAlready · 27/12/2022 12:43

Please DON'T get a kitten!

Your existing cat might well hate having another ct around
The kitten will be indoors as well (which I think goes completely against a cat's natural instincts to want to climb and wander)

Cat owner with 42 years of experience (all my cats were allowed to go outside)

KillerRobotCompetition · 27/12/2022 12:46

Why a kitten?
There are lots of cats in rescue that can’t go outside due to FEV or whatever. If you get a kitten then your cat goes, the kitten will miss them. Just wait until your cat is rehomed then adopt an indoor only cat if you still want a cat.

Anything else would be cruel imo & isn’t something a responsible pet owner should do.

Supernormative · 27/12/2022 12:46

I agree. Don't get a kitten. Your cat has nowhere to escape to and kittens are lively and demanding. Cats are natural loners as they get older and bringing another cat into a high rise flat will be destabilising for all. I second cat proofing the balcony. Could you harness train your cat and take him out for walks? There are some great YouTube videos on how to train your cat to do this.

Original poster
simplefree · 27/12/2022 13:00

MyBooksAndMyCats · 27/12/2022 12:37

The first thing I'd do is cat proof the balcony. It's easy enough with mesh wire. Or take him out on the balcony with a cat Leash.

But yes I'd get a kitten as a friend if you intend on having him as a house cat. I have two house cats and a third cat who goes out. My first one used to go out but something happened and she's now terrified to go outside and she's a lot happier having a friend whose always in with her.

the balcony is cat proofed and he loves being there - he scared through my bedroom windows during the heatwave - silly me I didn't realise he would contort himself so much to go outside. I didn't think he would fit through that slightly open window.

OP posts:
Original poster
simplefree · 27/12/2022 13:03

KillerRobotCompetition · 27/12/2022 12:46

Why a kitten?
There are lots of cats in rescue that can’t go outside due to FEV or whatever. If you get a kitten then your cat goes, the kitten will miss them. Just wait until your cat is rehomed then adopt an indoor only cat if you still want a cat.

Anything else would be cruel imo & isn’t something a responsible pet owner should do.

a kitten because of territory issues - research that I read says that it is easier for an older cat to accept a kitten in their territory

OP posts:
Toddlerteaplease · 27/12/2022 13:05

Cat proof the balcony and stop messing the poor cat around.

Original poster
simplefree · 27/12/2022 13:05

Supernormative · 27/12/2022 12:46

I agree. Don't get a kitten. Your cat has nowhere to escape to and kittens are lively and demanding. Cats are natural loners as they get older and bringing another cat into a high rise flat will be destabilising for all. I second cat proofing the balcony. Could you harness train your cat and take him out for walks? There are some great YouTube videos on how to train your cat to do this.

the balcony is proofed and he enjoys being there - but is not the same as outdoors

I tried harness but he hates it - gets very distressed
He hates the lift and panics

OP posts:
Original poster
simplefree · 27/12/2022 13:07

The balcony is safe you all

During the heatwave I left my bedroom window open slightly more wide then usual not thinking he would manage to squeeze himself out

Sorry if this was not clear on the OP

OP posts:
trythisforsize · 27/12/2022 13:08

If you like cats volunteer in the cattery instead.

Getting another cat to try and solve the boredom problem of your 1st cat is just adding to the misery of cats being kept indoors.

Pet ownership needs rethinking, 99% of the time it's just forcing an animal into a restricted life.

Find another hobby.

Whipmuncher · 27/12/2022 13:09

IToldYouAmillionTimesAlready · 27/12/2022 12:43

Please DON'T get a kitten!

Your existing cat might well hate having another ct around
The kitten will be indoors as well (which I think goes completely against a cat's natural instincts to want to climb and wander)

Cat owner with 42 years of experience (all my cats were allowed to go outside)

Respectfully, I disagree with this (similarly experienced cat slave here!). As long as you equip your home sufficiently with cat trees, toys, things to climb on etc - AND are willing to put in the extra work to keep your cat entertained, cats can be perfectly happy indoors. I have had indoor and outdoor cats and the only issue with the indoor ones is ensuring they don’t get bored. Definitely look into cat proofing your balcony.

An existing older cat is more likely to form a bond with a kitten than an adult rescue, and they would keep each other entertained. If you do decide to keep your cat then I’m going to go against the grain here and say a kitten might be good for him. Also a kitten would not have had a taste of the outdoor life so will adjust more easily.

You’re clearly a responsible person who really cares about your cat and is trying to do the best by him. Good luck, whatever you decide :)

Original poster
simplefree · 27/12/2022 13:15

trythisforsize · 27/12/2022 13:08

If you like cats volunteer in the cattery instead.

Getting another cat to try and solve the boredom problem of your 1st cat is just adding to the misery of cats being kept indoors.

Pet ownership needs rethinking, 99% of the time it's just forcing an animal into a restricted life.

Find another hobby.

I agree with you but I think you didn't read the part where I was living on the ground floor and my cat had an amazing garden to go to everyday.
Life threw me a curveball and I am on the 9th floor now. Too long and complicated to explain.

OP posts:
Original poster
simplefree · 27/12/2022 13:17

Whipmuncher · 27/12/2022 13:09

Respectfully, I disagree with this (similarly experienced cat slave here!). As long as you equip your home sufficiently with cat trees, toys, things to climb on etc - AND are willing to put in the extra work to keep your cat entertained, cats can be perfectly happy indoors. I have had indoor and outdoor cats and the only issue with the indoor ones is ensuring they don’t get bored. Definitely look into cat proofing your balcony.

An existing older cat is more likely to form a bond with a kitten than an adult rescue, and they would keep each other entertained. If you do decide to keep your cat then I’m going to go against the grain here and say a kitten might be good for him. Also a kitten would not have had a taste of the outdoor life so will adjust more easily.

You’re clearly a responsible person who really cares about your cat and is trying to do the best by him. Good luck, whatever you decide :)

Show quote history

thanks for understanding

the balcony has always been cat proofed

OP posts:
Supernormative · 27/12/2022 13:56

It sounds like your set up is fine OP. Just look at lots of ways to keep your cat entertained inside. Another cat is not the answer.

Original poster
simplefree · 27/12/2022 14:01

Supernormative · 27/12/2022 13:56

It sounds like your set up is fine OP. Just look at lots of ways to keep your cat entertained inside. Another cat is not the answer.

he does not like any toys I buy anymore but he has plenty of climbing / hiding spaces - any suggestions of entertainment activities appreciated

OP posts:
iknowwheretheothersockgoes · 27/12/2022 14:11

My DCat is an outdoor cat but doesn't enjoy playing when indoors. I spoke to the vet and he said that some cats just don't want to play indoors. The essential thing was that DCat has a lot of places to hide and sleep. Does your DCat have that??

iknowwheretheothersockgoes · 27/12/2022 14:12

I didn't mean to double ? there!

Original poster
simplefree · 27/12/2022 14:17

iknowwheretheothersockgoes · 27/12/2022 14:11

My DCat is an outdoor cat but doesn't enjoy playing when indoors. I spoke to the vet and he said that some cats just don't want to play indoors. The essential thing was that DCat has a lot of places to hide and sleep. Does your DCat have that??

he used to play indoors a lot in addition to going out
that is why I think he is too sad

being re-homed by the charity could be the best thing in his life moving forward but I will have no say in who they will choose - and no updates to know he is okay

OP posts:
Allergictoironing · 27/12/2022 14:19

A suggestion for the windows is Flatcats window screens, I have them because my cats are indoor only. That way you can have the windows wide open in summer but the cats can't get out.

iknowwheretheothersockgoes · 27/12/2022 14:21

How old is he now? Some cats do become less playful as they get older.

RandomMess · 27/12/2022 14:24

I second FlatCats for your windows ready for the summer.

I wouldn't be against getting a kitten as it's highly likely they will bond and play well together. My older boy loves the kitten so much.

Favourite toys are cat springs and catnip mice.

https://www.amazon.co.uk/CATMAT-Spring-Luxury-Interactive-Activity/dp/B08ZQRSRR1/ref=ascdff_B08ZQRSRR1/?tag=googshopuk-21&linkCode=df0&hvadid=534907126773&hvpos=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=3890672607010990768&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=m&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=1006854&hvtargid=pla-1433960082601&psc=1

Original poster
simplefree · 27/12/2022 14:28

unfortunately the FlatCat will not work on my old council flat style windowns as they open by tilting inside if you know what I mean? The bottom part goes out but the top part comes in - all of them.

OP posts:
Original poster
simplefree · 27/12/2022 14:30

iknowwheretheothersockgoes · 27/12/2022 14:21

How old is he now? Some cats do become less playful as they get older.

only 2.5

OP posts:
Original poster
simplefree · 27/12/2022 14:31

RandomMess · 27/12/2022 14:24

I second FlatCats for your windows ready for the summer.

I wouldn't be against getting a kitten as it's highly likely they will bond and play well together. My older boy loves the kitten so much.

Favourite toys are cat springs and catnip mice.

https://www.amazon.co.uk/CATMAT-Spring-Luxury-Interactive-Activity/dp/B08ZQRSRR1/ref=ascdff_B08ZQRSRR1/?tag=googshopuk-21&linkCode=df0&hvadid=534907126773&hvpos=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=3890672607010990768&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=m&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=1006854&hvtargid=pla-1433960082601&psc=1

thank you - ordered

OP posts: