How did you know it was the right time to put to sleep

[namechange085]

It was confirmed today by the vet that our lovely cat who we have had for over 12 years (she was about 3 when we got her) is at the end of her life and likely to be in pain/uncomfortable.
We have brought her home to spend some time with her. We obviously have got some pain relief. I just feel extremely guilty making the decision. The vet has obviously left it completely to us. I feel guilty if we do it too soon but also I don't want her to be in a lot of pain and miserable. I just wondered how others made the decision?

If you're thinking about it, it's the right time - better a day too soon than a day too late. It's very hard but you know you have to do the right thing by your puss. Been through it many times and it's a kindness to let them go peacefully with no pain. Hugs to you.

i had to put my cat to sleep at 16 on September the 6th after a month before the vet telling us everything was fine. Then to the worse of the worse and honestly I can’t get over the feeling that I murdered my cat and it absolutely breaks my heart but I know in my head that she wasn’t enjoying life. There is a list that I basically used called the Feline quality of life scale www.thenzcatfoundation.org.nz/learn/the-feline-quality-of-life-scale/
The day I had to take her I knew, I could see it in her face she just didn’t want to be here, she wasn’t herself and as much as it kills me. I would rather she be happy with a peaceful end with love than to suffer.

My heart absolutely breaks for you. Take it easy, you will know when it’s right for you and your kitty. Massive love to you

As very many will tell you, better a day too soon, than a day too late.
As you now know that your much-loved pet (I'm sure) is going to die, it's time to make plans.
Maybe plan for as soon as possible, but in the meantime concentrate on giving them lots of love.
I had to let my old boy go over two years ago and I still feel the pain that I had to do it, but it was better than (for me and how I felt about it) leaving him to be in more and more pain, with no quality of life.
As much as you would want to keep your beloved pet for ever, at least you can make that decision for them, so they don't go on suffering.
It's a hard choice to have to make, but a loving one.

We had to make this decision just a couple of days ago. Once we realised our 12 year old (so not old) kitty was suffering we took the decision immediately and the emergency vet put him to sleep. It's horrible having to do it, but personally I cannot let an animal suffer in any way if there isn't any future.

There's a saying 'better a week too early than a day too late' and it's a very wise one. Cats are very good at masking pain. We knew the other day that we had to put the cat's welfare before our own feelings and made the decision as a family to pts immediately. Of course we are heartbroken, but we know we've done the best and right thing for our beloved ginger boy.

@namechange085, and sorry, I should have said this before - I'm so sorry you find yourself in this situation.

@DramaAlpaca, I'm so very sorry for you too. It's such a painful decision isn't it?
My old lad was around 22 / 23 when I had to make the decision, but, even with his advanced age it was horribly difficult.

Very sorry about your cat OP. I'm afraid I also tend to think that if you are asking the question then it is almost certainly time. 💐

When a terminally ill cat is taking medication to help it cope with the pain. That's not kind, to keep her alive like that. The kind thing is to let her slip away peacefully. Don't keep her alive because you don't want to make the decision.

The vet was very hands off with us too. My cat was well into her 20s, I'd had her since a kitten and knew, just knew, that it was time. But the vet did offer blood tests etc and to keep her in under supervision which surprised me as it was so bloody obvious to me. I think he was trying to be gentle with us and not push us into anything - but really it was a ludicrous suggestion and would have resulted in a much less calm and pleasant farewell.

Thank you for the sympathies @vipersnest1, much appreciated. It really is the hardest decision, but the right one.

My cat had HCM but was very well with it. She started losing weight very quickly. The cardiologist doubled her diuretics and her kidneys packed up. Had bloods done, but I looked at her that night and realised the light had gone from her eyes. The vet said it was treatable, but it really wasn't. Waited for the results to come back just so I knew for certain and had her PTS that evening.

Her death was really peaceful and dignified. And I have absolutely no doubt that it was the right thing to do.

Please,@namechange085 , the greatest kindness you can do for your beloved friend is to let her go.

Seriously: do it now.

Believe me, I've been there, and I'm so, so glad I made that very hard decision.

Thank you everyone. It's the first time I have had to make such a decision and whilst I knew it would be hard I didn't expect so feel so uncertain. I suppose that is just the guilt.
We got her a couple of months after getting married so she has been with us almost all our married life. Going to tell the kids today so they can spend the day say goodbyes and ring the vets tomorrow morning.

Our vet told us. I'm not being flippant with that - he is a community vet who set up in our village the year I was born and has lovingly looked after generations of our pets. He tells us clearly and simply when the time has come.

If your vet is leaving it completely open that's not very helpful, but might suggest the time isn't quite yet in terms of purely avoiding suffering, but do ask them what they would do in the same circumstances.

I'm sorry for what is about to happen, but have also taken genuine consolation from being with our cats when they are put to sleep. It is so kind and instantaneous. I wouldn't have believed it and was personally glad to make that choice.

I am going to revise this in light of other people's posts. Clearly it isn't every vet who is as clear and careful about avoiding pain as ours. It sounds like you have made the right decision.

The bit about the kindness of it is right though. It is a gift of love and ownership.

I really struggled with this when it was our beloved dog. I remember saying to mil that ‘if I decide she’s going to die then it’s like I killed her’ but mil said it’s not deciding if she’ll die (she was dying) it’s deciding how she’ll die. And a dignified death before they’re too uncomfortable is really the best of the worst. Very few animals die a natural death that’s comfortable.

Oh it's so hard. I had this at the beginning of this year. Our vet really does not lead the thinking, they were very uncomfortable, and suggested quite silly and expensive tests the week before. I found the video here on the PDSA website really helpful though, and for our dog it was the loss of interest in food that really did it for me.

www.pdsa.org.uk/pet-help-and-advice/pet-health-hub/other-veterinary-advice/euthanasiaputting-your-pet-to-sleep-advice-video

It's terribly hard and my heart goes out to you, OP. I've had to make that decision 3 times now with cats who had various chronic illness. The third cat was the worst as he seemed on the face of it to be fine and was going about his daily (if restricted) business, in and out doors. However a trip to the vet revealed a large mass in his chest and it was apparent he had very little time remaining - in fact the vet wanted to euthanise him there and then. On reflection, I can see he had symptoms of discomfort, but you know cats, they mask so well.

My partner (who was with our cat at the vet) insisted the vet come to the house after hours and euthanise our kitty there (they had done so for 2 previous cats). This was what happened and our kitty passed away peacefully at home. I felt terrible about it as I kept feeling I'd put a healthy cat to sleep (he was nearly 18 and very far from healthy!). It took me some months to come to terms with the decision (which was the right one). It spared him having a very unpleasant end, possibly only a day or two later. He was such a trusting, loving soul, I still miss him.

You're doing the right thing, OP, just give your kitty loads of love. Thinking of you.

It's the last kindness you can show her and it sounds like now is the right time.