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Join our community of cat lovers on the Mumsnet Cat forum for kitten advice and help with cat behaviour.

How to stop aggression?

3 replies

TMose · 02/10/2022 10:09

We have a cat called Ronnie, who we adopted two years ago. He is extremely gentle, good with people, good with cats and dogs, has never shown any aggression.

Our next door neighbours kicked their cat out, Daisy, and stopped feeding her and stopped letting her in. She was sleeping in a bush for a while until I realised what was going on as she was looking skinnier. I started feeding her and letting her in when my cat wasn't around but whenever they would both be in the garden at the same time she would hiss at him and then lunge and go to scratch him. She would also hiss at us when she first saw us.
Also my cat just runs away he never sticks up for himself or retaliates so they don't actually fight, she just goes to attack him but he darts off.

I spoke to the neighbours and they confirmed that they no longer want Daisy and tried to re-home her but nowhere will take her as they are full.

I really wanted to take her so I thought maybe she was only acting aggressive towards my cat because she was starving and though he was going to steal her food that I was giving her.

It's been about a month and I have been keeping them completely separate. Sometimes they do see each other in the garden but they just sit separately and ignore each other, unless they come face to face. When I let them in they go in separate rooms, but they have seen each other through the gap under the door sometimes

Now that Daisy is used to getting fed and sleeping here she no longer hisses at all. They met in the garden yesterday and Poppy went over to Ronnie and they touched noses. I was amazed but then she just started slapping him! She was batting him over and over and he scrambled away. She didn't hiss and her claws didn't come out.

Is this progress at all seeing as it was slaps not scratches? Or is it still just as bad? I don't know what I can do to stop her from doing this. He just ignores her he is no threat (although she obv thinks he is). Could anyone give me some advice because I really would like to keep her. Has anyone dealt something like this where one cat is unfriendly to the other and how did you solve it?

OP posts:
FluffySocksAndHotChocolate · 02/10/2022 10:12

It's normal. I have three and my eldest one can become aggressive if she feels threatened (literally the other two will sit on the floor by her while she's on the sofa and she'll go nuts it's happening less and less though) and other times she'll be really passive and ignore them.
Just takes time.

Allergictoironing · 02/10/2022 10:23

Sounds like pretty good progress to me. No hissing, no claws, no growling & no blood/tufs to fur make me think this was more play fighting or warning than real aggression.

It's only a month, give them time 😀

Surtsey · 02/10/2022 10:30

Our female cat bats the boys like that. I suspect it is what mother cats do to kittens when they are being annoying. You've made good progress, so don't give up yet. Maybe get one of those Feliway plug-ins, there is one called Feliway Friends, which is designed to calm things down between cats living together.

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