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Join our community of cat lovers on the Mumsnet Cat forum for kitten advice and help with cat behaviour.

Can cats get lonely?

9 replies

Anothernamechangeplease · 20/08/2022 20:04

We occasionally agree to feed our neighbours' cat when they are away. In the first couple of days, it generally seems sweet and friendly - purrs a lot, rubs up against our legs, seems to enjoy being stroked etc. It appears without fail when we go to give it fresh food, whether it's inside the house or outside - it comes rushing towards us as soon as we arrive. But after its owners have been away for a few days, the cat starts to get a bit aggressive - it still purrs and rubs up against us, but it stands in front of the door and tries to swat us when we leave, and occasionally it tries to nip as well. My teenage dd was too scared last time to go and feed it again, and I must say that I didn't really enjoy it either.

Not being a cat owner myself, I know nothing about feline behaviour, but the only thing I can think of is that the poor cat may be feeling lonely if its owners are away for more than a couple of days? Is that possible? And if so, is there anything we can do to minimise the aggression?

The neighbours have asked us to help again next week, and we're not really sure what to say. Don't mind putting down food and water for the cat, but we haven't really got the time to spend hanging around and petting it etc. We did mention the aggression to the neighbours last time when they came back, but they didn't really say much... just something about the cat being grumpy.

Can anyone advise? I feel really sorry for the cat if it's craving company, but we can't provide that company so wondering if it might be better to tell the neighbours to make alternative arrangements?

OP posts:
Fluffycloudland77 · 20/08/2022 21:12

Yes they do, their very complex little animals who don’t take things well!

Fluffycloudland77 · 20/08/2022 21:13

I left mine overnight to get married and he refused to purr the next day.

BlueKaftan · 20/08/2022 21:17

Sounds like a lonely and upset cat, also possibly with some additional energy from being bored. Toss a few treats in the corner and while puss is eating them prepare the food and leave. Aggressive cats are usually best distracted.

Bluebells12 · 20/08/2022 21:23

Yes he sounds lonely and stressed. Cats do sometimes nip when they’re feeling affectionate but swatting doesn’t sound affectionate.

You and the owners know that they’re only away for a couple of nights, but for all
he knows, they’re never coming back. He feels abandoned and stressed.

Having you pop in to feed him is still better option than a cattery though, cats hate those.

Sockmonkeysloth · 20/08/2022 21:32

It would be better if they could find someone who would spend some time with the cat instead of nipping in and out.

Antarcticant · 20/08/2022 21:36

Yes, they do miss their humans. I agree with pp, the neighbours need someone who will spend time with their cat as well as just feeding him - a paid cat sitter.

SallyWD · 20/08/2022 21:49

Definitely! It's always been clear to me that any cat I've had gets very lonely and quite depressed when we're away. I now use Housesitters so at least my cat has company most of the time. It works well. Can you spend some time keeping him company? It might calm him down.

Anothernamechangeplease · 21/08/2022 01:12

SallyWD · 20/08/2022 21:49

Definitely! It's always been clear to me that any cat I've had gets very lonely and quite depressed when we're away. I now use Housesitters so at least my cat has company most of the time. It works well. Can you spend some time keeping him company? It might calm him down.

Thanks for all of the replies.

Unfortunately, I don't have the time to spend with the cat, nor the inclination if I'm really honest. I do feel very sorry for the poor little thing, but if I wanted a cat, I'd get one. I have agreed to feed him previously as a favour to my neighbour, and was OK with going in twice a day to give him fresh food and water and maybe a quick stroke, but I wouldn't be willing or able to commit to any more than that. My dd is also busy, and she is actually a bit too scared of the cat to spend any time with him now.

I will suggest to my neighbour that the cat needs more than we are able to offer, and hopefully they will be able to find someone else/ pay a catsitter etc.

OP posts:
mountainsunsets · 21/08/2022 07:56

Cats are generally sociable creatures and do like human interaction, fuss, play and cuddles. Yes, you'll get the odd one who isn't bothered but I work with animals and most of the cats love a fuss and human company.

I leave my cats when I go on holiday but there are three of them and the sitter spends 30 minutes, twice a day giving them a fuss and company when she comes in to feed them.

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